Daft things you got told off for as a kid? (lighthearted)

[jennymanara]

I remember my mum offered me extra pocket money to do a pile of family ironing. When I had finished it, she told me off for not ironing creases into the front of her jeans (the kind you do in smart trousers). My protestations that jeans do not have ironed creases in them fell on deaf ears.

Too many to list, but I'll have a go:

Mispronouncing "beverages" (I thought it was "bee-verages").
Frequently wearing trainers/slippers/wellies without socks.
Picking up litter.
Wanting to type out books I had read on our word processor.
Pretending that my grandparents' sliding kitchen door was a lift door, and constantly opening and closing it.

My teacher asked me what colour did I think my new coat was so I told her it was 'taupe'. I got into trouble for being cheeky. But the catalogue said it was taupe!

Ironically I should have been in trouble for not having a blue or black coat rather than my nonexistent cheek.

#injustice

My mum demanded to know how I'd spilt the hamster's drinking water from his bowl. I explained that I'd moved the cage with my foot, and that I was not expecting so much friction between the cage and the carpet. My mum screamed "don't you dare use long words!"

But it was the fucking truth.

Not me, but I remember a couple of brave children defying the fearsome primary school headmistress (she used to rant about whatever point she was trying to make), while she was drilling us in this awful song which had the repeated line "'cause we're all one family".

Headmistress: "It's 'family', not 'fam-ER-ly'!!! Who says 'family'? Put your hands up.
(Most of the children put hands up)
Headmistress: "Who says fam-ER-ly?"
(A couple of children put hands up, which she wasn't expecting)
Headmistress (with a huge sneer) "Oh, do you?!?!?!"

Making jam sandwiches for school packed lunch. It was orphan food apparently

At school, sometimes we were given half an apple for "pudding". I was told off for trying to eat it with a spoon, instead of biting into it. Mind you, I knew someone at university who used to "kill his pudding" before eating it, by stabbing repeatedly with a fork.

Touching the TV screen when it was on. Do you remember the crackle it used to make? I was told I'd get a sore (as well as square eyes).

Putting my bare feet near the fire to warm them. I was told I'd get my feet burnt off, like Pinocchio.

Climbing up the back of the sofa, over the top, and plopping down on to it. I called it "basting".

Rhyming words that went with witch. I went through the alphabet and got to bitch, my dad was angry with me. I was 5 and had no idea it was a swear word.

Told off for swearing by a dinner lady when I was 8. I didn't have a clue what she was talking about and hadn't said anything remotely sweary or insulting...

I'd only said to my friend, "remember when I trapped this finger in the desk?" Which had happened a few months earlier resulting in a good amount of blood and a very exciting finger bandage.

It was my middle finger, so I got grassed up for swearing and there was no sweary context at all. I didn't even know you could swear with your hands

In the last couple of years I was told off by BiL for stepping backwards off the path onto the lawn. I was trying to avoid the shed door that he was opening that we had to admire.

He has two DSs. He's wasting his time aiming for an immaculate lawn in a small garden!

Walking with a limp and a stoop by my uncle. I have had excruciating pain in my legs since I was a very small child, and in this particular day, I was bad with it, he told me to stop walking like a poor old invalid, and poked me in the back so I would stand up straight. I was about 9!

I got a clip round the ear when I was little and for years didn’t know why until I was around 15 and I realised that my mother thought I was saying the F word when I showed her my impression of Muttley from Wacky Races!

My granny told me off for eating ice cream because I'd "get a chill in my stomach".

She had taken me out to the cafe and let me order the ice cream!

Buying red court shoes age 13, with money I earned baby sitting. They were slutty apparently!

I think I might win?

One Christmas I received a new cocoa mug with some marshmallows and I fancied using it that morning. I couldn't find any hot chocolate powder in the cupboard so settled with nesquick chocolate milkshake powder. My dad had a right go at me and warned me never to use it for anything other than a milkshake again. Wtf? Does it matter if I have it with hot milk instead of cold milk?!

My cousins and I still laugh about being told ‘don’t run, you’ll fall over’. Weirdly none of our parents said it to us individually, only when we were all together!

Being too thin ('people will think I'm not feeding you - drink your minadex')
Being accident prone
Pacing up and down (I was anxious - it was a displacement activity)
Using long words (only at school - my parents were quite happy for me to use long words)
At secondary school I was told off for 'pretending to be stupid'

Staying in and reading on a nice summers day, my mum thought I should be out playing.

I was gently told off for dropping things / knocking things over. Mid 40s and I've been diagnosed as dyspraxic!

Laughing at her - she hated it but once me and Dsis got the giggles we were inconsolable 😂

Singing off-key at the assembly. I had broken my arm so couldn't play my instrument and was given a solo. The band accidentally started on an A rather than a C and it kept going out of range. She was furious.

Spilling olive oil on the outside steps

For getting the shower wet when having a shower. Not the floor, the shower.

Nesquick is trying to encourage people to use hot milk with it now.