Do housework strikes actually work?

[Sofasurfingsally]

I was reading an article in the Guardian today about housework strikes by women. I've read threads about them on here often over the years, and lord knows I've had cause to. But I'm curious to know how effective they are.

Have you every gone on strike? What happened after? What about the longer term- was any change lasting?

Academics evaluate practice-why shouldn't we?!

[CruCru]

To be fair, if I went on strike the person who would be most irritated by it would be me.

[YesQuite]

To be fair, if I went on strike the person who would be most irritated by it would be me

This

[OnlineAlienator]

I did. DH never mentioned, but started going to ridiculous lengths to avoid having to do things, so i thought fuck this and we split up. 16mo later due to circs i have had to move back in - surprise surprise i had to muck out the house to make space to move, and im back doing pretty much everything . I did all cleaning and tidying in kitchen yesterday incl. Disinfecting health hazard microwave (very vocal while doing so) - it is a tiny kitchen and it was all back in situ by 10am, and there he stands with a plateful of sausages I cooked, pratting about trying to decide what he can balance them on rather than doing any cleaning or tidying.

He is now shamefacedly doing the token amount of washing up he does to prove he's a Good Man.

And this is why i will never move in with a man again.

[REDCARBLUE]

As above poster, id get irritated.

Ive told my friends if i die before DH they need to ensure he hires a cleaner.

[Kiwiinkits]

Yes me too. What works better (if you have the means) is outsourcing the cleaning/shitwork to someone else, and giving out a hard stare followed by grey rock if he complains about the cost.

[notoafternoontea]

No, they just irritate me and leave me with a shit ton of work when I break (after about two days).

I used to live on my own and my flat was spotless and beautifully organised.

[SerendipityJane]

How about a sex strike ?

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lysistrata

[bushtailadventures]

I used to think about going on strike when my dc were teenagers. I never did it though, because I knew that, although they would feed themselves, maybe even wash their own clothes, everything else would be left until I 'got over it'.

Even if it did work, who's to say it would last? I can see it being a temporary fix, but I think it would all slide backwards again. How many strikes would it take to be effective long term?

[TwittleBee]

Nope, went on housework strike with my flat mates. It got so bad and awful that I ended up practically living with my, then, BF. Flat mate's mum ended up popping in for a coffee and proceeded to clean the whole place - of course flat mates all bought her flowers and chocolates to say thank you... I officially moved out that following weekend after that.

What's worked with my DH when we first moved in together was open and Frank conversations about house work etc. We now follow that TOMMethod which means whoever is off work knows what needs doing on what day.

[Passthecherrycoke]

Ime a hell of a lot of men when left alone either react like onlinealienators partner or simply contract out to a cleaner, which is pretty hurtful.

Also the problem with housework is it works most smoothly little and often. Go on strike and the likelihood is you’re storing up a bigger problem for when you break.

It’s shit but I think the best thing is to outsource to a cleaner, but the problem is that only helps so much- a cleaner once a week isn’t going to deal with the constant wiping/ dishwasher unloading/ laundry/ collecting things and putting them back in the right place etc

[Ninkaninus]

No I haven’t because thankfully both of the men I’ve lived with have been equal partners and have never given me cause to.

I could not live with a man who expected me to take up a mummy role with him. Ugh.

But I suppose if I somehow ended up with a man like that I would very quickly have to set about teaching him that he ought to have the self respect to act like a fully functional adult, and sufficient respect for me not to expect me to act like some kind of skivvy. Actually no, I just couldn’t bring myself to bother...if you have to go on strike then they don’t deserve you.

[Knittedfairies]

I'm not sure my husband would notice for quite a long time. I agree that the best approach to housework is a little and often; I know he'd do the 'big' things, but I suspect that crumbs wouldn't bother him as much as they irk me.

[Sofasurfingsally]

Hmmm. So far it sounds like they are ineffective. When I was younger I used to find mine would change for a couple of weeks once I started asking him what he was actually for.

Now mine are all grown up (DS3 left sixth form college yesterday!) , it's easier. Sometimes I get more taxed about what they haven't done than anything else, and make everyone put in 20 minutes.

[ChewbaccaHutchinsCool]

Don't think they work long term. Best advice I had was to immediately terminate relationships with men who were a mess.

[Bravelurker]

This thread is stressing me out remembering the zero fucks given by the partners /flatmates you were trying to punish, whilst you were delaying the inevitable.

[ChewbaccaHutchinsCool]

YY, the flatmates and partners don't give a fuck, you're the one getting stressed and irritated. Not so bad with flatmates, you can move out, hence, why I even issue that advice to my daughter and stress it over and over, if you go out with a bloke and find his room, his flat, his car a total shit tip, RUN, just run, no matter how hot he is or anything, he's a swine and will never change.