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Anyone had one child for 7 years and then had another?

26 replies

wwyd24 · 11/06/2019 22:00

Didn't want any more until it just felt right..

Anyone else?

OP posts:
BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 11/06/2019 22:04

My folks! I was 7 when my little sister came along. My dad worked away but wanted another, my mum said not until you're home for good. Then it got to me being seven and she gave him the ultimatum. Work close to home or no more kids.

AdmiralSirArchibald · 11/06/2019 22:04

6.5 years here. Totally not interested in having two, then really wanted another. She is a blessing and a torment 😂

Crazyladee · 11/06/2019 22:04

Yes, us. Two boys.. 7 years between them. What do you want to know?

Flopdoodle · 11/06/2019 22:06

I'm about to have a 6 year age gap and super excited about it :)

PurpleCrazyHorse · 11/06/2019 22:13

6yrs here. Our reason was that we were living in a very small house and simply no room for a baby. Our oldest was also a terrible sleeper and I just couldn't have managed with a baby and a 2.5yo on very little sleep.

In fact our age gap has worked well and both children have been able to have lots of 1-on-1 time with me as our oldest was in school when DS was born.

WeArnottamused · 11/06/2019 22:42

7 years here too, both 2 boys, although I was a single parent for 3 of them, hence the age gap

wwyd24 · 12/06/2019 12:28

@Crazyladee

I don't know really just looking for experiences... good and bad

OP posts:
Toooldtocareanymore · 12/06/2019 12:56

I have a 7 year gap, wasn't exactly the plan, we lost a couple in-between, but its how it worked out in end, I have nothing but positives for this, at times it felt like I had two only children, as at very different stages of their life-but they were rare occasions, eg one in nursery when one in primary, got younger into primary and sibling went to secondary after one year, now younger leaving primary while other in uni, it has meant though we have always been able to focus on child that needed it eg exams, medical issues etc different bedtimes and routines meant lots of time with us, in my case younger didn't sleep as a baby- or well really as a child still, so the older one went to bed earlier, as we knew this may cause problems we built special routines around this it was mum time while dh dealt with the terror!!

It has meant I will never have 2 teens at same time! and the bond between my two is so tight, by time younger was old enough to be annoying, sibling was old enough to understand. In fact at times they have confided in each other rather than tell a parent. I have had a great babysitter for last few years, there has never been any issues sharing clothes or toys or computers or net flicks account, as well grown out of , or use at different times.
Only negative is perhaps the little fellow got babied a bit as there were three people to run about after him and look after him.

Singlenotsingle · 12/06/2019 12:57

My dsis had a baby girl, then 13 years later had her DS.

MrsBlondie · 12/06/2019 12:58

6.5 years here. Son now 13 and daughter 6.5.
Reason being son never slept til he was 4 and we couldn't face the sleepless nights!

Its fine. Any age gap is what you make of it, all have good and bad

Mintypea5 · 12/06/2019 13:06

My DS was 6.5 when his brother was born. I think it's a lovely age gap. DS can understand about baby needing mummy etc and he's really helpful grabbing me a nappy etc if I can get to them.

Mintypea5 · 12/06/2019 13:06

I forgot to say DS1 adores his brother and they have a wonderful relations! DS2 thinks he's the most amazing
Persons

LenoVentura · 12/06/2019 13:09

Two DS, 7 years apart. Got divorced in between, then met now DH and had DS2. Downside was that they never went to school together (went to the same primary but not at the same time, didn't go to the same secondary) so they don't have that shared experience. DS1 went off to Uni as DS2 started secondary, so they effectively didn't live together from DS2 being 11. They are friends but not particularly close today.

Upside, they never went to school together...
Also upside, being the same sex they shared a bedroom when they were both at home which meant they could have the third bedroom as a playroom / study. Upside - they have had a lot of individual attention because the age gap was such that they did different activities. It was also easier to manage a newborn and an older child than I imagine it to be wrangling a newborn and a toddler.

amusedbush · 12/06/2019 13:14

My brother and I are 6 and a bit years apart, I’m the eldest. It didn’t work because we were at such different stages and then by the time he stopped being so fucking annoying was a young teen I had moved out. I don’t see him that often and we’ve never been close.

YorkieTheRabbit · 12/06/2019 13:43

I’m watching a good friend go through hell at the moment with a five month old and and eight year old. Velcro reflux baby who doesn’t sleep and the eight year old is playing up no end as mum is completely knackered and can’t just put the baby down to play, read, go swimming, cinema, bake, all things which they did together.

DennisSkinnersMolotov · 12/06/2019 13:46

DS will be 7.5 when this one arrives in September. The age gap wasn't planned, it just took us nearly 4 years to conceive baby 2. DS is very excited and it's sweet to hear him talking to his brother already.

The only thing I wish I could have timed better would be being off on mat leave over the summer holidays.

HereForAdvice2019 · 12/06/2019 13:46

12 Yr gap. Between my Ds and dd..
20 yrs between me and my sibling

Eastie77 · 12/06/2019 13:52

A friend has 3 children aged 7, 14 and 22. All planned. I don't understand why anyone would want to drag out the baby phase, school runs, teenage years etc for that duration of time but she is very happy with the set-up and the 7 year old is doted on by her older brothers.

Whatsnewpussyhat · 12/06/2019 13:57

Yeah, bit of jealousy and attention seeking from the older one because they'd been used to being the only and having us to herself. Much better now past baby stage though.

NabooThatsWho · 12/06/2019 14:03

I’m watching a good friend go through hell at the moment with a five month old and and eight year old.

That can happen with any age gap though?

MsAwesomeDragon · 12/06/2019 14:05

Dd1 was 10 when dd2 was born. There are reasons for that, like me going to uni, graduating, getting a job, meeting now--dh, then taking a long time to fall pg.

It's worked quite well, but it's been like having 2 "only child" experiences. Dd2 was dragged along to watch what dd1 was doing a lot as a toddler/preschooler. Then dd1 got more independent as a teen and was left at home while I took dd2 places.

They're now 19 and 9. Dd2 idolises dd1, dd1 sort of tolerates dd2. They don't spend much time together, but dd1 will do some childcare and school runs if necessary when she's at home (she's home for the summer but going back to uni in October).

gubbsywubbsy · 12/06/2019 14:09

Me and the gap is really big .. we have to have separate days out 😩

Crazyladee · 12/06/2019 14:24

Okay OP there's exactly 7 years between my 2 boys.

The gap wasn't really planned that way due to various reasons but I felt it worked really well.

It was relatively easy when DS2 was a newborn as I would get my eldest to school and have plenty of time to bond with DS2.
I also think it's great that DS1 had quite a few years of our undivided attention and having us all to himself before DS2 came along. Logistically it worked well as having just the one child in a pram was easy. When DS2 was born, my sister had a one year old and a two and a half year old and would be struggling going out and about with a newborn and a toddler.

Relationships wise, they didn't really get on until they were much older but I don't know whether that's down to the age gap or just different personalities.

Dollysuite · 12/06/2019 14:27

Yes, two boys, eight years between.
We didn’t really experience any problems because of the age gap. The elder took having a sibling in his stride.
As they grew up though, they were at totally different points in their lives so had few interests in common.
They’re adults now and very close.

Redcliff · 12/06/2019 14:40

I have a 7 year gap between my two boys and its worked for us. Upside - at 7 oldest could amuse himself when DS2 was tiny (although he was a velcro baby I just put him in a sling for cinema trips ect) and now DS2 is 5 they get on really well - there isn't the jealousy that I think a smaller gap would have brought.

Downside - apart from the odd cinema trip or meal out it is hard to find things they both like to do so not lots of trips out as a family (although trampolining has been a hit)

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