Would this make you suspicious?

[JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff]

Feeling a bit sensitive about this so please don't wade in - just trying to get some perspective.

DD is 4.5y old. She has attended a private nursery since 6mos, FT or 4 days/wk. From the age of 6mos-4y they raised no concerns about her. Parents' evenings, handovers etc, no concerns and always within usual age range for EYFS assessments or slightly ahead.

On day in Jan this year they said to me she had behaved oddly that day. She had blanked out when staff spoke to her and become quite upset. This was unusual so they would keep an eye over next few weeks. Fine.

Over the next few weeks she was sometimes quiet and subdued, and sometimes didn't listen. Nothing else.

On Feb 21 I was rung and asked to leave work early due to concerns about DD. They wouldn't say what. I rushed there as soon as I could, only to be handed a tablet which showed a video of her making jerky movements with her arms. They told me they wanted me to make a GP appt that week with a view to seeking a dx of autism. Then she could have a support worker brought in. I asked, to support with what, exactly? They couldn't really say.

We compromised by sending DD to a private paeds psych who specialises in autism dx. She is taking her time, meeting with us, with DD, interviewing nursery staff. She will then write a report indicating whether there is enough to push for a dx. Recently, the nursery have started pushing, asking when will her report be ready, will it be next week, when are we going to start approaching GP for referral etc.

I couldn't really understand all this urgency. DD is behaving in a non-concerning way at nursery at the moment.

Then, I found a recent Ofsted report for the nursery. It is dated Jan this year. They have slid from good to requires improvement. One of the things they need to improve is demonstrating that they have supported individual children's needs esp those with additional needs. They had to produce an interim report for Ofsted by Feb 27th and another by July this year.

Suddenly, I am wondering...... is DD a manufactured case study for their Ofsted?! Am I crazy to even think along those lines.....?

I'd be pushing for medical tests rather than going down a psychiatrist route, as it sounds like a neurological issue to me.

Have you spoke to the GP about her symptoms without mentioning autism?

Hi Simple

No, we haven't, because the nursery specifically said they thought she had autism and we should be asking for a CAMHS referral. So we took her to a professional specialising in autism.

I am really intrigued by all the people saying it might be neurological. That had genuinely never occurred to me, as something to bring to the GP.

So can I ask, if your preschooler had one episode where she became upset and went 'a bit blank', would you go straight to the GP because of that?

It seems a bit '0-60' to me, iyswim. I just assumed she'd been very upset and was becoming withdrawn bc she didn't have the social skills to articulate that, rather than assuming she should be investigated for epilepsy or similar.

It sounds kind of odd to me...I guess I'd ask if you are worried? Does she display any concerning behaviours at home? If not...it is perfectly ok to say you're not concerned and won't be pursuing it! You get to make that decision! You sound pretty switched on, and able to advocate for your DD.

Also, in my experience CAMHS won't get involved unless there are significant concerns about a child's progress. They just don't have the resources!

I don't think I'd take my child to the GP after one episode as you describe if I had no other concerns.

Ex CAMHS worker here and I think you're handling this in exactly the right way.

Whether these concerns have been flagged up due to the OFSTEAD report is difficult to say, it could be purely coincidental and I'd suggest you put this question to one side, continue as you are and tell the nursery everything is in hand.

If this situation is making you doubt the integrity of the staff at the current nursery it maybe worth considering a change.

Good luck and have confidence you are handling correctly.

Hi Mutha

Thanks. I really really appreciate you commenting.

Tbh when the nursery called me in, back in Feb, they were so insistent I was really taken aback. We had had a great relationship for 3.5years at that point. Then all of a sudden it was 'come home right now and make a GP appt for your child this week as we have serious concerns'.

I didn't share their concerns but I also thought, crikey, these are trusted professionals looking after my child and they are expressing real worry. I didn't think a GP would take me that seriously if I said 'well she's had 2 episodes at nursery.... no, never witnessed it myself.... no, no prior concerns... no, I'm not worried myself'. I felt that a private specialist would just be easier to engage with. We've gone to considerable trouble and expense.

I know the Ofsted question isn't something I'll ever know. But I saw those dates on the report and thought uh-oh, that all fits..... no concerns whatsoever for 3.5y--then Ofsted tells them they have to evidence they are supporting DC with additional needs, and suddenly I have to make a GP appt right before they have to report back.... funny that!

Anyhow the psychologist will probably be reporting back in the next fortnight so we'll see.