Baby shower do and dont's?

[EmeraldIsle81]

Hi Mumsnet, planning a baby shower but not been to many myself. Looking for ideas here, dos and don't s , do I invite my partners female friends and family too? Do I invite male family members? Is it just sit around and eat food, what else are you supposed to do? Do the guests bring their own kids? Not a clue really .... thanks!!

I'm sure you'd find Quilting bees and Knitting circles, and pot luck suppers in the church meeting rooms twee too.

I love a good stitch and bitch. No need for games, just chat.

I don’t really see how it’s considered less ‘grabby’ for a friend to organise your baby shower if you’re aware that they are doing it/encouraging them to do it than it is to organise one yourself. In fact I think it’s arguably worse!

I don’t really see how it’s considered less ‘grabby’ for a friend to organise your baby shower if you’re aware that they are doing it/encouraging them to do it than it is to organise one yourself. In fact I think it’s arguably worse!

Well, just put it down to cultural differences, then, because I've never heard of anyone in Canada who thinks they are grabby.

Do I invite male family members?

God, no.

These responses are horrible! I have a close group of friends and we all threw each other baby showers. It was our last girlie get together before giving birth and we loved it. We played silly games, ate loads and drank non-alcoholic Prosecco.
Do it exactly as you please. If you do it big, games are difficult. Most party websites have baby shower games and they’re lots of fun. Enjoy OP, don’t let others put you off.

I am the most 'non-twee' person ever but I don't get the baby shower hate? Surely it's just a nice opportunity to have a final get together with friends before the baby arrives? I think balloon arches, flower walls, massive cakes etc are a bit OTT but they aren't doing anyone any harm?!

FWIW I had multiple baby showers for both of my kids. One with colleagues, one with one group of friends, one with another group of friends etc.

All of them were very casual get togethers hosted at one of my friend's houses - one of them was literally just pizza and a few glasses of Prosecco in my friend's garden. Most people did bring a small gift but this really wasn't the purpose of the event.

Congratulations on your upcoming arrival!

Urgh. Good luck, OP!

My aunt had a stillborn, I had a stillborn, two of my colleagues had a stillborn, one other colleague had a sick baby that died at two weeks old. I like the idea if a party but I'd have the party after the baby has arrived just to be sure.

I love a good stitch and bitch. No need for games, just chat.
That was pretty much 90% of the time spent in baby showers I've been too, including my own.

PrimeraVez
A pre baby get together is lovely. But then just do that and arrange a nice catch up.

There's no need for a gift giving event before baby has arrived and twee games.

Ok, so the twee games and all the tat thay comes with such events (balloons, props for photos, baby themed decor etc) is more my issue with disposable culture and that everything has to be cute and instagrammable. I find helium balloons spelling 'baby' etc so wasteful and it's more for show than anything else. That's my bugbear more than anything else.

On gifts, I dislike giving gifts before baby has arrived. It doesn't sit comfortably. I've known too many people with miscarriages and still borns etc to find the whole thing quite uncomfortable. The idea of anyone having to dispose or return loads of presents following a loss when they are grieving is heart breaking.

To me, have a lovely catchup before or after birth and presents are for after baby's safe arrival.

Ah OP congratulations and if you want one, have one. You do ‘you’. There will be loads of context and relationships that you can’t convey in a mumsnet post and some people on here feel strongly for or against them. We don’t all need to like the same things, and some people have the ability to rub along with all sorts of different people and customs (wish I was one of them!) and others are less tolerant. What suits one person isn’t going to suit others. Just enjoy the last few weeks of anticipation and prepare for the new baby however suits you.

(Ps I didn’t have one but only because my baby came 6 weeks early - I was trying to think of a pre-sleep deprivation hang out with both genders of friends and family, and their kids, before that) x