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Problems

4 replies

Hypothesis16 · 27/05/2019 21:23

So myself and my girlfriend have been together for a few years and everything has been, I wouldn’t say perfect but hasn’t been too bad just like any couple. We have two children, one step child and one together.

So my girlfriend and I had a child a few years ago and when one of her best friends found out they fell out and haven’t spoke for around 3 years until recently. She kept contact with another friend who has been in her life and our child’s life since I can remember.
I don’t drink and I don’t condone drugs and before we got together I asked her if this would be a problem that I don’t drink and go out clubbing or partying to which she said no, but now I’m thinking that was just a lie.

So with having two children and with her being best friends with someone who also has two children they socialised a lot and occasionally went out drinking to which I have no problem with. I wanted her to have fun and didn’t stop her from doing anything she wants.

Regarding all this, my girlfriend has reconciled with her old friend and now all of a sudden socialises a lot more and I’m getting the brunt of it because things have changed all of a sudden.

I work ten hour shifts at the end of the week and after a long day I want to come home to her at 10.30pm and relax and talk and do what couples do. This has changed recently were now her friend is round at our house at weekends and my girlfriend all of a sudden likes to drink and is very inquisitive of her friends very social life. She does drugs and very active with males and my girlfriend is very keen when engaging in the conversation around all of this. The girl then ends up staying over and with takeaway boxes all over the floor, wine glasses all over the floor and most nights she’s here something is spilt all over the carpet/rug which she never cleans and I end up having to sort it out. When it’s time for the kids to wake up (6/7am) and go down for breakfast they’re both lying there passed out on the settees with no intention to move or leave so the kids can get on with their day. It generally gets to midday before the girl leaves and it’s quite frankly annoying.

My girlfriend now spends even more time on her phone ignoring me and the children and when I question her about our relationship it all seems to be my fault.
She’s now ditched her best friend for years for her new reconciled friendship and now Our relationship is over and I have to look for somewhere to live.

I know I’ve missed a lot of detail but it’s very hard for me at the minute I just need an opinion from someone else.

Any questions asked I will answer but I want to know if I’m being unreasonable in thinking she needs to think about fixing her relationship instead of going out getting drunk and any opinions on the situation will be grateful.
Thanks

OP posts:
AliceRR · 27/05/2019 21:28

There’s a lot going on there OP. From what I understand she’s recently been spending a lot of time with one friend, socialising and drinking, and it impacted on your relationship and your free time. Is that right?

And now she has left you? Do you know why?

If she doesn’t want to fix your relationship she doesn’t have to. She could be going through a hard time for whatever reason or she could just want to move on.

I’m sorry you’re going through this.

Hypothesis16 · 27/05/2019 21:44

I don’t understand why though, before her friend came along we were I the best place we’ve been at since the honeymoon stage. Everything was perfect, we were getting along so good and then it’s just gone downhill, she says she just doesn’t want to be with me and doesn’t want to try and work it out.

OP posts:
magicBrenda · 27/05/2019 21:46

She might have met some one else.

Interested in this thread?

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AliceRR · 27/05/2019 21:51

Could she be having a relationship with the “friend”?

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