How to overcome the super-impossibility of doing something you're too afraid to do?

[BankHolidayBingo]

I'd like to hear success stories of others who've managed to overcome their supreme fears to step outside the box & do something they needed to do. I'm hoping I can learn something that my help me with my struggle. I have an apocalyptic fear of getting a job & yet I desperately want to be working. Every time I've stuck my head above the parapet I've been rejected. Often now I can't even leave the house. Sometimes I can't even feed myself. I am in therapy for this. If you've once been totally stuck like me, what were the events or tipping points that enabled you to move forwards?

Not as serious as what you describe, but I had a phobia of driving that stopped me from even trying for years. The tipping point was having DC1 and feeling that it would be so much more convenient for all of us if I could drive. I had CBT, and it was pretty apparent that my anxiety was much wider than just driving, and understanding what that anxiety was really about helped me get some perspective, and encouraged me to find the bravery I needed.

I also did something practical to take a first step (got refresher lessons). Breaking things down like that can help. I wonder if there's something similar you could do? E.g. volunteer for something, as a one-off? It might feel a bit "job-like" without all of the pressure?

It also helped that DH was very supportive. We're all anxious about something, although many people are good at hiding it! It helps to have someone you can talk to who doesn't think you're weird for having a particular fear, or says you just need to get over it.

Hope you manage to overcome this.

Try some CBT techniques I was taught. Break the situation down into chunks. How does it make you feel physically? Heart racing, breathing trouble? Get on YouTube and look at mindfulness techniques and breathing exercises.

What are you scared will happen? Think of a time you were scared in the past. What were you scared would happen and what actually happened? It may have been less bad than you thought, even if not you lived to fight on. Get a plan for what will happen if what you want doesn't happen, a plan B.

Analyse why you're scared. Is someone putting pressure on you? Your parents, spouse, are you competing with high achieving siblings?

I've sometimes used these. I've also had to make myself do things that I'm shit scared of. Just doing it in spite of the fear, trying not to think about it. I've made progress in my fear of heights like this. I've managed climbing walls and Go Ape now, but still can't climb a dark clocktower.