Ever Changed Your Job To A Lower Paid One?

[IfOnlyOurEyesSawSouls]

Hello

I am wondering if any of you have ever chose to leave your stressful job for one that is lower paid ... ie approx a third less in salary.

If so how has it impacted upon your life and that of your family?

How has it affected your physical & mental wellbeing, your relationships, social life and activities that you like to do?

Positives & negatives please & thankyou 😊

Thankyou everyone, much appreciated.

I'm in that situation now. Current job has huge amounts of stress and is anxiety inducing. A potential move would be a 20k drop in salary and I'm worried that even if I do move the stress levels will be the same. What's making me stay where I am for now is that my current role has an extra 6 days of annual leave and that is too precious to give up. I did find my dream role last month but did not get the job. It threw me into a really deep depression for a while and I'm worried it made me feel desperate enough to settle for anything job wise. Trying to take my time and wait until the right role comes along but that means worrying my current job and my stress levels are through the roof.

This is a good thread OP

Yes I did recently. Almost a 10k pay cut.

Before I left my old job, I was having panic attacks every Sunday evening. My husband found me sobbing on the bathroom floor and told me I had to leave.

I went back to a career that I’m passionate about with much less stress, I haven’t regretted it for a second. No job is worth sacrificing your health for, mental or physical.

Thats a nice thing to say @TeaAddict235 .

Its been Inspired by the fact that i was assaulted at work 6 months ago. I went off sick for a few months because i found myself in a dark place . While i was off, i really sat and thought about what my values were , and whether my lifestyle was helping me to live in accordance with my values.
At the time i was working full time , in a very stressful job earning the most i had ever earned and equal to that of my partner.

But i was so exhausted all the time. I had a senior position so often ended up needing to do work at home , and i just had no energy left to do the things that helped my relationships or my wellbeing. For example walking our dog, reading, going to the gym etc.
The people that i was channelling my energies into at work support wise we're nowhere to be seen when i was assaulted.

My job was to support people's well-being but i just wasnt paying any attention to my own and really lost myself.

Im in the very early stages of making changes but I have already cut my hours and my days .

Im just not sure yet how the significant loss of earnings will impact upon us a family (obviously we have worked out we can afford the bills , its just everything else that goes along with it ).

Im really glad it has worked out for you @WifOfBif 😊

Have you talked it through with anyone @Powergower ?

Thank you, I wish the same for you

I did. Never regretted it. Was doing something that felt worthwhile and returned to me my self-respect. We bumbled through financially. Life is too short to stick with something you are not happy with. Money is not everything.

Children survived and learned important lesson about values. They missed out on some things, but that is life - you can't have everything you want.

Your absolutely right @Mishappening .

One of the top 5 regrets of people on their death bed is that they wished they had worked less.

Best thing I ever did... It was hard to adjust to new budget etc but better for my MH and my family!

Thats lovely @BoysAreEasier

Bless you @IfOnlyOurEyesSawSouls . Well done for finding a healthy solution. I think that your thread is very thoughtful as so many of us have caring responsibilities (parents and children) and our mental health is stretched nowadays as there isnt the support of the whole community. A change in career or jobs is relevant to how we juggle modern day life, and make it to the end.

They say that it's in our darkest moments that we actually blossom. Think of a seed under the soil with everything against it, it somehow summons the energy to break through the shell and the soil to reach the sun and then blossom. Amazing.

Thanks for starting this thread, OP, as DH and I have been talking about this recently.

He's on £41k in a stressful job in a horrible company and he hates it. Last year he interviewed for his dream job, but read the salary wrong and it ended up being £28k. He ended up turning it down.

He's going for more interviews but they're all around the £32-34k level.

I think I'm going to have to take up the financial slack, but I'm freelance and struggling to earn even £18k (my average) at the moment. We have D.C., a mortgage and debts to pay off a c I don't know how well do it.

But voluntary redundancy has come up in his stressy job and that'd give us a £30k buffer.. if the timing works out, it might be ok.

@TeaAddict235

I have often said I really don't think we were designed to live like this. So fragmented and disconnected.

Its no wonder that maternal mental ill health is on the rise ... we are told that we can have it all , career , family, wonderful holidays, sparkling homes , instagram worthy social lives , but at what cost.

Iv decided to really knuckle down to what my core values are ( I wrote them in list form ) and now each day i start off reminding myself that my intention is to meet those core values.

Iv also learned that although compassion is very high in my values... it has to include compassion toward myself. I cant carry on tying myself in knots thinking i need to work more & earn more so that i can endlessly give to others .

Hi ifonly, do you mean have I spoken to anyone at work? I work in a massively competitive ance target driven field (commercial lawyer) and we are all expected to manage and deal with the stress. It's difficult to raise it honestly. But I do know I can't sustain this pace but don't necessarily want to work less hard. I love working hard, I just hate the stress and anxiety with this particular role. Also, any drop in salary has an inevitable impact on our family so there's huge guilt associated with dropping salary. I also feel really upset at the thought of dropping salary when I've worked so hard in my field to earn what I do.

If the dream role came round again i would definitely go for it irrespective of salary.

@HasThisSoddingNameGoneToo we are paying debts too ( in fact we are with Stepchange ).

But i found that the more we talked we through the more realistic it became to drop my salary.

Often we tell ourselves a story of why we think we cant take a big step, usually through anxiety or fear , (eg "we cant afford it " or " i will feel guilty for not being able to give the children as much " etc ) . I felt trapped for such a long time with these ideas , but honestly, there are always options.

@Powergower I mean have you spoken to any of your loved ones about how you feel?

Yes I totally get the guilt. Grappled with it a long time , and to some extent i still am. But at those times i just visualise my head stone reading "stayed in a role that dug her own early grave so she could earn more for her family" - which I honestly went to bed some nights feeling so stressed i was scared for my heart.

I used to for a long time feel defined by my role. It had taken me years to become senior and I enjoyed being able to develop others. Really enjoyed it.

But the reality was (and i was the very last person to acknowledge this ) is that I couldn't do all that and feel fulfilled at home . So when i miss my old responsibilities i just bring myself to the here and now where i feel calmer , im not ruminating so much over work stressors , and i can give more of myself to the people that matter to me because im not so frazzled & exhausted.

I was just existing and now I feel like i am living.

I've just accepted a job that's a 25% salary drop. I couldn't go on as I am in my current job. My mental health is more important and I'm sure it's the most economically sensible solution long term.

Interesting thread. I've hung on in my current role for a long time and I'm not sorry as it's enabled us to save and buy a house. But it's made me quite miserable.

DH and I had a long chat at the weekend and I think I will be resigning soon and looking for another job which is part-time (properly part-time, none of this "work all the bloody time but only get paid for four days because that is when you are officially in the office" nonsense), more local and less stressful.

I am equal parts excited and terrified!

I did and don't regret it for a minute. I've got a much better quality of life Nd my mental health is so much better.

Hello,
I have just gone from 50k working four days a week, term time only (holy grail eh?!) to 20ish (flexible and I choose when) hours term time only but an actual take home of 12k.

I am running a small charity. Day to day work is 100% less stressful than before. In fact there is no stress. Plus I am using my skills and strengths. The rhythm of my day is better paced. I am getting to exercise daily, eat daily and my house is in order. My children are all out happier because I am taking them and picking them up from small. This is all adding to feeling amazing and worlds away to a few bleak months ago when I was dragging a bloated and stressed and headache fatigued body through life. Shadow living. Not living.

I also feel like I have the potential to apply for project funding to do more interesting projects and get paid better connected to the charity.

So it doesn’t feel like a step down. It feels like liberation!!

But it’s mixed. If I am totally honest there is a part of me that is a bit disappointed. I was paid so well because I was so good at my job, but i couldn’t keep up with the pace and keep house, and look after my children and stay well.

However I would rather be where I am now. I am also holding it with some openness and if we really can’t manage on this new wage I will have to make a change but for now my husband is earning, we are saving money on childcare and we have stopped over paying our mortgage.

I definitely think women work harder for their money. Maybe that's why it gets overwhelming. I know the men in my office at my level are not consumed with imposter syndrome, mum guilt, wife guilt, worries about school pick ups, homework, lunch, dinner, cleaning etc etc. I feel they have the head space to be able to give their all to work.

Thanks for this thread OP. My own experience isn't totally relevant - I quit a relatively well-paid and highish-status (though esoteric) job to be a SAHM. I found the job stressful and fairly meaningless, and felt there wasn't much of me left over for any of the things I actually care about. We are lucky in that my husband earns enough to pay our bills - though we are by no means well off.

Although I'm much happier and healthier now, I do sometimes doubt myself and my choices. It can be difficult to live in a society where the dominant values (intense focus on the importance of "work ethic", individual career development above all else) are at odds with our own convictions. So it's nice to know I'm not alone, because it can certainly feel that way!

Placemarking as I am considering a job change that would mean a 20k pay drop.
It's far more aligned with what I like doing and will be far less stressful.