Staying at her dads

[Raimbow]

I'm just after a bit of advice really.
My 14 year old daughter often stays with her dad ( we are seperated )he lives with his new partner . My daughter loves seeing and spending time with them but will not stay more than a couple of days because of the bad living conditions?
I dare not bring the subject up with my ex but it does seem such a shame?
Any words of wisdom for me?

What's wrong with the living conditions?

What do you mean by 'bad living conditions'? Do they not have a room for her, or is it mess related?

Think you should elaborate on the living conditions part x

Ok they live in a flat and very untidy to say the least...she says you can't even see the floor. She sleeps on a sofa and comes back with flea bites. Her clothes etc smell as although her dad has supposed to have given up smoking he still is

Flea bites?! I'm far from houseproud but that's beyond the pale. I wouldn't let her stay overnight again until they'd taken steps to address the flea problem - and preferably bought her a single bed and mattress to sleep on.

Is it definitely fleas or could it be bed bugs? They can live in sofas too.

Can't be sure..she came home with bites over her after they gave up their bed one night, so could be bed bugs. Sad thing is she chooses to sleep on the sofa,there is a single spare bed in the girlfriends daughter's room...however my daughter says it's very uncomfortable and she can't even get in the door of that room for stuff!

You 100% need to talk to her dad. I would be livid if my daughter was going round and it was like that there it's not on at all.

You need to speak to her dad. I'm not sure she's got much of a choice about sleeping on the sofa if that is her situation.

Have you been able to see inside the home for yourself?

I wonder if you could address the issue by saying that if they'll tidy up and deinfest you'll chip in for a new mattress, so there's a bit of quid pro quo? Not that you should have to, but to get some movement on the issue.

I'd still not be allowing her to stay somewhere where she's getting insect bites every time she visits - it's not just a bit of grime.

I have tried to message dad this evening but he has not responded. Yes I have been in the flat....

Still no rely this morning...his lack of response says everything really..such a shame he's not willing to listen!!