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tips on how to be more assertive

2 replies

Mary2019 · 19/05/2019 10:17

Does anyone have any tips on being more assertive? I suffer from anxiety and seem to turn to mush in front of my peers or people in positions. This recently happened with a school senco who is ever elusive never gets back to your messages or calls and when asking to speak to them recently was told they were busy. Cue a few weeks later when I had a 9:30am appointment to get to, DS1 was sent out of his classroom out of his learning time to fetch me back as "Miss B needs to speak to you". I had requested for an EHCP and this is what I wanted to talk to the senco about a few weeks previous. I should have gone to the office and said this isn't an appropriate time and they'd have to rearrange but I found myself waiting in the Office anyway. Where I was promptly told in a 30minute waffle meeting that they wouldn't be supporting an EHCP if I went ahead. I had it all planned in my head what I was going to say yet found myself saying "well I'll leave it for now then". I'm kicking myself for not being more assertive but I really struggle.

OP posts:
peppaminttea · 19/05/2019 10:31

Sorry, going slightly off topic with the assertiveness... I would thoroughly recommend requesting an EHC assessment yourself. School said exactly the same to me, yet my son still got one. It's not easy but I assume you have sufficient evidence if you are thinking of filing for one yourself. There is a Facebook group called EHCP experiences England which is a great source of help for parents just like you, as well as charities such as IPSEA and SoSSen who have guides to the whole process.

federationrep · 19/05/2019 19:20

Fake it till you make it. I was bullied through primary school but was going to a different secondary so thought I'd escaped. First day and a second year made some comment. I remember this distinct thought of "no not again" and gave as good as I'd got. Then went and was nearly sick in the toilets. I didn't know who it was at the time but turns out they were a horrid bunch of girls who were definitely looking for fresh meat to be the brunt of their jokes. I'd say the whole of secondary was about me finding my voice. Many times I'd go back to that first day and think if I did that I can do this.

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