Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

PREGNANT DRINKING+ TERMINATION

24 replies

doonchey1 · 19/05/2019 00:58

Hi, I recently found out I was 6 weeks expecting I have a 20month old DS.. I WAS ON PILL prior to finding out. Just wonder what any of you had experience as think it's too soon and me and DH thinking of termintion as heavy drinkers IE bottler of wine A NIGHT cooking/after dinner to unwind...PLEASE HELP..

OP posts:
SpoonBlender · 19/05/2019 01:52

Twenty-nine months between is a good gap imho. You don't want them too far apart.

There's no safe level of alcohol, but there's no good studies either. Most FAS comes from more a bottle of vodka a night than half (?) a bottle of wine.

Alcohol doesn't actually relax you, and makes your sleep worse so it's a bit self defeating as an unwinding tool. I write this at 2am with a diaqairi in front of me Grin

If you want the kid now, odds are decent all will be fine - and if not, then early alcohol damage generally results in a non-viable foetus that'll MC at some point. I'd suggest taking yourself to the doctors or prenatal consultant for a chat and a scan. And stopping drinking.

Caterina99 · 19/05/2019 02:21

Only you can decide if it’s too soon. Mine are 2 years 3 months apart, which is smaller gap than yours would be, and that seems like a very normal age gap amongst friends.

As for the drinking. I’m absolutely not a doctor or an expert, but I was led to believe that drinking in the very early days of pregnancy didn’t affect the fetus much. Of course you should stop immediately, but a bottle of wine a night is excessive anyway in my opinion so you should try and cut down for your own health whether you want this baby or not

Caterina99 · 19/05/2019 02:22

*that end bit should say cut down even if you don’t want to keep the baby. Obviously if you do then you need to reduce your alcohol immediately

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

mindutopia · 19/05/2019 06:50

There are plenty of people who drink heavily through pregnancy without realising they are pregnant and all is fine. Baby is barely even attached to your bloodstream at only 6 weeks.

It’s slightly different but I was on holiday and then had houseguests just before I found out I was pregnant with my youngest (between 4-5 weeks). I certainly drank at least a bottle of wine a day in that week or so before! It never would have crossed my mind to get a termination.

If you don’t want another baby, sure, but not because of drinking. I can’t see how you would do any harm at this stage as long as you stop now.

LuckyLou7 · 19/05/2019 07:35

If you don't want another child, arrange a termination.
If you want to address your alcohol dependent lifestyle whilst caring for a toddler, that would helpful - see your GP.

Passthecherrycoke · 19/05/2019 07:38

You’re only 6 weeks, the placenta isn’t attached so the alcohol isn’t getting to the baby

If that’s the only reason you’re considering termination then it’ll be fine. But it sounds like there are others so I could concentrate on them in making your decision

doonchey1 · 19/05/2019 11:13

Im new to this so don't. O how to edit .. re the bottle of wine a full bottle is 4 glasses we share a bottle or somethimes just get the small 1 each.. I am NOT ALCOHOL dependant

OP posts:
outvoid · 19/05/2019 11:22

The embryo isn’t feeding from the placenta yet so at this stage, no harm will come.

Entirely up to you. Had a 15 month gap between my first two and 14 month gap between DC2&3. They’re all very close now and it’s become far easier the older they have got.

NamelessGem · 19/05/2019 11:24

Troll thread no doubt about it

SpoonBlender · 19/05/2019 11:43

My "and stopping drinking" comment is only relevant if you decide to keep the pregnancy! Wasn't getting on your case.

gamerchick · 19/05/2019 11:49

Troll thread no doubt about it

Don't say, just report.

OP if you're for real then drinking every night indicates some sort of dependency whether you'll admit to it or not.

KindergartenKop · 19/05/2019 15:19

I wouldn't be expect that amount of alcohol to have a massive impact on the baby.

I don't think the decision should be based around the alcohol, it should be about whether you want/can cope with/afford another child.

doonchey1 · 19/05/2019 16:29

Hi, I'm not a troll this is my first post and I'm very scared, I'm only 18 and I don't drink every night but I was concerned I would have harmed my baby. I am married and a SAHM and have noone to turn to... It's like I'm stuck in a rutt and don't no what to do for the best I never thought about a second baby and was on the depo proior to taking the pill. I took the pill AFTER I was pregnant and didn't even more I am concerned maybe that has affected things

OP posts:
HJWT · 19/05/2019 16:40

@SpoonBlender if your going to give out ridiculous advice like that you need to stay of these threads.

MWNA · 19/05/2019 17:01

You say you and your child's father are both heavy drinkers. Who looks after your child in the evening if you're both pissed?
Sounds like a shit home for your kid.

BurnedToast · 19/05/2019 17:16

Do you want another baby?

That's the question OP and one that only you can answer.

mytittifersungtheirsong · 19/05/2019 17:20

So you were married/had your first DC at 16? Are your family supportive?

GhostIsAGoodBoi · 19/05/2019 18:29

@SpoonBlender That’s a ridiculous and frankly dangerous post.

OP if you’re both drinking that much per evening, who the fuck is looking after your child?

A bottle of wine per night is more than enough to seriously damage a baby during pregnancy. FAS is not something to be taken lightly.

doonchey1 · 19/05/2019 19:15

OK..!! maybe I made my self sound like an alcoholic . I DO NOT DRINK EVERY NIGHT AND WHEN IM COOKING. DINNER I WILL SOMETIES SHARE A BOTTLE 2 glasses each with the meal and that's it's for the night? I know all of you are mother's but I asked for advise not to be abused. My son sleeps through the night bed at 7:30 and awake at 7, that's his own routine he likes and has been doing this since he was 9 months old. If ANY OF YOU READ I'm more concerned about taking the pill while being pregnant I'm booked to gyno on Tuesday. IM GOING THROUGH A TOUGH TIME DEPRESSION WISE and doing the best I can and sometimes I think I'll have a glass with dinner I really didn't think I would be judged when I posted on here.

OP posts:
Angelinthenightx · 19/05/2019 19:59

Just wait & see what they say, there is no baby in the sac until 6/7 wks pregnant so im not sure how taking that pill would affect things. Best thing now is no more drinking until u deside what to do.some women dont know they are pregnant & drink etc & their babies are fine. Try not to worry & stay calm & healthy.

gamerchick · 19/05/2019 20:05

YOU are THE one who SAID they were drinking EVERY night.

We can only GO ON what you say in YOUR POST.

Look OP, speak to your doctor and go through your choices and your worries. That might be your best bet.

LuckyLou7 · 19/05/2019 22:27

me and DH thinking of termintion as heavy drinkers

That's what you wrote. Now you're snapping at us for addressing your alcohol consumption as well as pregnancy concerns.

nwybhs · 19/05/2019 22:30

Not gonna lie, quitting alcohol is a better long term solution than termination.

Irulez · 19/05/2019 22:36

Tomorrow, when you're calmer, ring an abortion clinic and see what counselling and advice they can give.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread