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Have I been had?

25 replies

Witchofzog · 13/05/2019 17:55

I don't think so but I don't know. Walking to the train station today I saw a woman who was heavily pregnant and crying. She was trying repeatedly to call someone on her phone.

I stopped and asked if she was ok. She said she wasn't. Her boyfriend had smashed his phone and hurt her (she had 2 phones with her - one smashed) and she wanted to get back home to another city nearby but only had £3. She had been trying to call her friend and only had 4% on her phone left. I offered to pay for her train fare and she said no, it was too dear, so we settled for coach fare. She was reluctant and didn't want to accept it but I took a tenner out and gave it to her.

My friend who I have just been talking to said this is a well known scam. But this lady wasn't asking for money and was reluctant to take it. She was wearing a maxi dress and definitely heavily pregnant. And I just thought- if that was me I would want someone to help me. But she did also say that she had been shouted at by a homeless man before so maybe she had been asking people for money.

Do you guys think I have been scammed? Either way it doesn't matter I guess as I could not leave her in case she is genuine and if she isn't then I hope she does something good with the money

OP posts:
DecomposingComposers · 13/05/2019 17:58

Maybe a scam. But if I can afford to lise the money I would rather give it and they didn't need it than not give it and they really needed it.

That was a kind thing that you did.

TeaForTheWin · 13/05/2019 17:58

I wouldn't think so. What does your gut tell you? Did you see her get on the coach? Anyway, you did the right thing scam or not.

Chancewouldbeafinethlng · 13/05/2019 17:58

I think that’s very kind of you. I would like to think she was genuine but you will never know.

Sparklingbrook · 13/05/2019 18:00

Wouldn't she have accepted the train fare and not said it was 'too dear' if it was iffy?

ScreamingValenta · 13/05/2019 18:00

If she'd been scamming you, wouldn't she have taken the train fare, rather than the cheaper coach fare?

Singlenotsingle · 13/05/2019 18:02

It's only a tenner, and I'm sure you did the right thing.

fuckitywhat · 13/05/2019 18:02

She sounds genuine.

If she was after money she would have taken the higher train fare amount.

Besides. I would rather help someone out and be scammed than risk leaving a crying pregnant woman fleeing a domestic abuse situation.

HelpAFattieOutHere · 13/05/2019 18:03

Sounds like a well known scam. There's a woman who does it regularly (although with a baby in a pram rather than pregnant, but no doubt she was pregnant to begin with!) near me. She is seen fairly regularly and the story is always the same.

Were you scammed? Maybe, maybe not. I'd have offered the coach fare and walked her to the station to buy it for her. That'd weed out the non genuines

bedunkalilt · 13/05/2019 18:03

If it’s a scam it’s quite subtle, expecting people to approach with offers of financial assistance. It could be, but it doesn’t sound like it’s obviously dodgy. And she turned down a higher offer of money too.

In my previous area we had a lot of street scams where people would try to sell a certain story. Obviously living there I saw the same people doing it, so it was clearly not genuine when a daily occurrence. There was a woman who would be in tears, would only approach other women crying that she’d fought with her boyfriend and how she needed to get somewhere else; if you couldn’t offer the money she asked for, she’d suddenly stop crying and swear and walk off! There was several others, different stories but similar outcomes.

Maybe where I lived was basic and you have a more sophisticated set of hustlers at play Grin but I would have given what you describe the benefit of the doubt too.

MyCatHogsTheBed · 13/05/2019 18:04

With the benefit of being an observer on the internet I'd have preferred to have got her to a police station to report the violence and get her into whatever system there is to help victims of DV.

Was it a scam? I don't know in all honestly. Hard to see that it was if she refused train fair which would have been more money. I have known very visibly pregnant women begging in what I assumed was a scam, though. The type where "I need £2 to catch the bus" then they don't get on the bus and collect lots of people's £2s.

Submariner · 13/05/2019 18:05

No, don't think it's a scam. The ones who are scamming normally approach you and say 'I need x amount for bus fare'. The fact that you approached her makes me think she was genuine. Good on you for your good deed!

bellinisurge · 13/05/2019 18:08

Even if she was scamming you, you did a kind thing and the shame is on her. She's the one who has to live with herself if she was lying about something like that to extort money. It wasn't very much so being a lying sod for such a small amount is pretty dreadful.

windysowindy · 13/05/2019 18:10

Well you know OP, it might be a scam, but if you hadn't helped her you might also be wondering and feeling shitty, so in a way, £10 you invested on not worrying.

AngelOfDeathNix · 13/05/2019 18:17

If it was in Oxford, there is a well known lady who does this on a regular basis!

Nandocushion · 13/05/2019 18:22

Sounds like a scam. You were walking to the train station, so if she'd accepted the train fare you would have taken her there and bought a ticket for her - instead of giving her cash. She wanted cash, obviously.

whitehalleve · 13/05/2019 18:34

It screams scam to me.

whitehalleve · 13/05/2019 18:35

She didn't want the train fare cos you were going there and probably would have purchased the ticket yourself. Sounds like she wanted the cash.

AlyssasBackRolls · 13/05/2019 18:42

People needing bus/coach/trainfare and being upset even bloodied and apparently beaten up is a well worn schtick for extorting money. There was a guy in my city who constantly gave himself a bloody nose and staggered around, asking for cash.

Witchofzog · 13/05/2019 18:46

Hmmm. Yes. My first offer was to buy the ticket. I didn't have time to take her anywhere as I had to get my own train. The thing that made me think it was, was that her whole demeanour changed when she had the money and she left sharpish. But that could have been to catch a bus who knows. Oh well. I tried to do a good thing even if I was scammed

OP posts:
DarlingNikita · 13/05/2019 18:48

You were walking to the train station, so if she'd accepted the train fare you would have taken her there and bought a ticket for her - instead of giving her cash. She wanted cash, obviously.

I'm afraid I think this too. I'd like to think better of people, but there we go.

Having said that, if she WAS genuinely in trouble then you've helped.

LaraLily90 · 13/05/2019 18:50

Regardless of whether it was a scam or not, you still did a lovely thing with the best of intentions

NoBaggyPants · 13/05/2019 19:00

It's a confidence trick. They draw you in by their modesty - "I couldn't possibly take the train fare, it's far too much", but they'll take the lower amount from you. And you think nothing more of it. Whereas if someone willingly takes the higher amount it might make you question it, possibly report it to the police.

Better to have five people give the bus fare without a thought, than one person give the train fare and risk you getting caught.

NoBaggyPants · 13/05/2019 19:03

This is a more elaborate version, but the principle is the same:

metro.co.uk/2019/04/09/drug-addict-posed-pregnant-woman-scam-kind-hearted-strangers-9141366/

AllAboutHallowsEve · 13/05/2019 19:10

Whenever I've been scammed by a sob story, they always leave sharpish without even a thank you.

Witchofzog · 13/05/2019 19:49

I am in two minds because I approached her. I have never seen her before. And she looked like someone I might be friends with. But she left very quickly after and it's that which made me wonder. That link though- I can't believe how much money people have that woman. I am glad she was jailed

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