Can't sleep and feeling very sad

[needtotalkaboutit]

Everything is getting on top of me at the moment.
I've got lots of weight to lose (6 stone according to BMI which was a shock!), started a healthy new diet and I've been really careful all week but I wonder if the lack of sugar etc is making my mood plummet. I do suffer quite bad depression and anxiety at times and it doesn't help that I forgot my tablets last night (sertraline, largest possible dose). So maybe diet + lack of meds has created a double whammy effect??

My lovely DS (age 6) has autism and ADHD, which seems more pronounced than ever atm. I worry myself sick about him, he hasn't seemed happy and settled recently and it's hard not quite knowing what's wrong. Also yesterday he fell down the stairs, thank god he bumped down them on his bottom and I caught him but it really shook me.

He's started saying to me "I want to go home", meaning his dad's, when he's with me. We used to have lovely times together but he's so obsessed with Minecraft now which he only plays with his dad. He doesn't seem interested in much else, whether it's books or his Lego or anything else. He just wants his Kindle or the TV and I give in much more than I should because I'm often tired, trying to catch up on things and can't seem to engage him with other things anyway.

Feeling so anxious at work atm for no apparent reason, today I got an email from my line manager asking to have a catch up and went into an utter panic, literally felt my body go cold and felt certain she was going to say they're not happy with my performance. Which I have no evidence for! What's going on in my head atm??!

My lovely supportive partner is away with work for the next few weeks and I'm missing him so much. I just want a hug 😢. I work essentially on my own all day and come home and worry about DS and his behaviour, whether he's happy, healthy, making good progress, doing okay socially etc etc. I feel helpless, I'm always trying to do the right thing for him but never sure if I am or not.

Sorry for this ramble. Just feeling pretty bleak tonight and needed to get it all out.

Hey, just saying hi. I know that feeling of not being able to sleep and being sad.... I find everything seems worse in the quiet of the night and bad things whirl round in my head uncontrollably!

Do you like music? I ask because I have found it often helps me to unfocus if I listen to something quietly, even in bed

Thank you for replying! Listening to something is a good idea actually, the radio always cheers me up. I'm going to try that (and give in to the temptation to raid the fridge!)
It really helps to have someone reply. Thank you.

Yum, hope you find something nice in the fridge 😁

Being alone a lot doesn’t help does it, there’s nobody to give a different perspective or cheer you up. I’m glad you have a lovely partner (sorry they’re away at the moment though of course!).

When have you got to have your “catch up” at work, do you know yet? It sounds horrible - maybe you should try and get it over with ASAP!

Btw if I sound like a know-all, I’m ok at thinking of ideas but useless at applying them to myself! Otherwise I’d be asleep by now 😂

Hugs and hope you feel better soon.

have you cut your calories too low ? that can make you feel unsettled, tired and anxious, reducing sugar is always good and you will lose weight provided you diet is healthier, but like everything else all in moderation.

I agree that going cold turkey on sugar may be contributing. Look into foods with natural sugars such as bananas?!

You are obviously a very caring mum, your DS won't suffer with extra tv atm. Do what you need to and don't feel guilty!

I have a rule for myself - never listen to anything my brain says after 9pm. It is not to be trusted. The key is to ignore it all and distract yourself with things that are nice and pleasant like podcasts or tv or a warm bath.

It doesn't make the problems go away but there's nothing good to come out of stewing on them at night :(

I entirely sympathise about the diet, it can be truly soul crushing especially when you're used to reaching for food as comfort.

Thanks all of you for being there. I'm still awake, feeling slightly less angsty but still not right. I've had a banana with some Greek yogurt but still feel hungry, maybe it's psychological though. Can't wait for my partner to be back home, I knew I'd miss him but I didn't expect to feel this low. We're very cuddly with each other and he's a really positive person which I think rubs off on me when he's around.
I think tomorrow I'll ease off on the diet slightly. I've been eating quite a lot 'on plan' but mainly fruit and veg which has been good but I think my body needs a bit of stodge. I do want to lose weight but given my mood issues, I might need to accept a little bit of comfort eating is better than being really unhappy? Maybe that's just my lack of willpower talking!!
DS is snuggled up next to me . I'm going to try again to get some sleep. Just feel like my brain is in overdrive worrying about him atm. Parenting is hard!

Hello.
I'm awake too. I have low mood and anxiety on meds and also have ds7 with ASD and adhd. It's not a combination that makes for good sleep. Also I need to lose 5 1/2 stone and am wondering if c25k will kill me !! No help but you are not alone in your predicament.

I hope you've got some sleep!

I did get some sleep, and now I'm awake over an hour before I need to be, argh! This is often how a bad patch starts for me...

Didiplanthis sounds like we're in the same boat. PM me if you'd like to chat.