To have compassion for my younger self?

[rubyblueeyes]

I normally feel crap about myself and my decisions but recently I've tried to be more compassionate to myself. I realise alot of mistakes I made were due to anxiety and insecurity. Anyone else practising kindness to themselves?

Yeh, there's a lot of things I look back and regret now. But hindsight is a gift. And if it wasn't for those mistakes, I would never have learned from them or be the person who I am now.

I got married when I didn't want to because I was worried about what others thought

One of my favourite quotes is this one (paraphrased) from Maya Angelou - a very wise woman indeed:

‘I did then what I knew how to do. When I knew better, I did better.’

Most people do the very best they can with the resources available to them at any one time. The same was true for you (and me). I try to afford myself the same compassion I would give to a friend or loved one. But it is a struggle.

I heard something nice recently. The usual line is what advice would you give your twenty year old self. Turn it around and make it, what would your twenty year old self thank you for? What have you achieved, created, worked through? So rather than berate or feel bad for your younger self, imagine how proud that self would be of you now

I have changed since hitting 30 defo and see myself in a better light.

I would tell my 20 year old self not to think she was ugly or worthless

And what would she say to you? Thank you for building our confidence? Thank you for taking those risks?

I'm trying too, op.
What's struck a chord with me is something Anita Moorjani said, about going beyond forgiveness (because forgiveness still has connotations of judgement), and getting to a state of empathy and compassion instead.