Please tell me what a typical day with your kids is like? (Losing The will)

[ClareSleepy]

I have a beautiful 3 month old DD and I love her to pieces but I need some hope for the future. It feels like my life ended the day I gave birth. I rarely have a minute except when she's asleep and I can't ever really switch off completely as I'm listening in case she wakes up! My DH helps when he's not working so I do get the odd hour here and there but that flies by and hen the sheer relentlessness of life with a baby continues.

What I would LOVE to know is how old are you kids and how is your life with them on a typical day? Are they in childcare and do you get time (how much) to switch off and do your own thing?

At the moment DD sleeps 7pm-2am and then 3am-5.30am so I know that's quite good for her age, then it's a constant cycle of feeding/ changing/ settling /random naps until bedtime again. Is this just what parenting is??? Please I've been consoling myself with the fact that at some point she will go to school!

Oh gosh. Very different but DD (19 months):

Sleeps 8pm-7.30/8am (and has done since 7 months)
DH takes her for the first hour, feeds her
We play at home until 9.30/10, then outing to local park/toddler thing.
Home for lunch at 12.
Nap 1-3pm.
Park/supermarket in afternoon, then dinner, playing, 20 minutes of Peppa, bottle, bath, bed. DH sometimes does the last bit.

It does get easier OP. For me it got easier when she was in 2 predictable naps a day, so I knew when my next break was coming. And going to bed with her in the early days was a lifesaver.

My DS is 3 months, sleeping 9pm - 5am then feed, sleep 5.30am-8am (ish)

I know what you mean by life's now a cycle of nappies and changes. I try to set myself "adult tasks" for the week. Don't limit it to a day because some days we struggle to achieve anything! But like, this week we'll go to town and buy something we need or even go clothes shopping, we go to baby group on Thursdays, we see certain family members particular days. Basically I try to fill the time as much as I can.

Try to see it as you're doing life but scheduling in the baby's needs, not that you're looking after baby and scheduling in your life (if that make sense)

It is really just a phase...and in a little while you will look back and see that it went so fast.

Its also very intensive looking after small babies and toddlers so really take any chance you can for a rest..I used to have a couple from my church come over and look after him so I could go upstairs and have a sleep.

Ah it’s all so new!

I’ll give you my week this week - pretty typical and I love it!

2x DSs, 3 and 1

Monday: had no plans and should have had a homey day playing but ended up trampoline park a.m., napfor littlest (12-3) and quiet time/Lego for eldest, then park to play with friends

Tuesday: DS1s swimming lesson then park again, (then chicken pox jabs), nap, grandad came round as me and DH were heading into London early, but usually would do another play date or play at home

Weds: physio appt for DS1 which also involved costa stop and play in playground and looking at a tractor and a digger. After naptime went to a local mini farm

Thurs: eldest in nursery 8-3. Took little one swimming. Did some work in naptime, then straight into nursery pickup

Tomorrow Friday : both in nursery! Wahoo! As of last week. I’ll do work.

DH our of the house 6am-8pm mon-fri usually, and usually takes the boys out for a few hours at the weekend. I do an exercise class Sunday mornings.

Got a nearly 4 year old here.
Mondays and tuesdays- wake him at 7, breakfast/toilet/dressed out the door at 7.40 to go to childminders. I go to work. Home at 6, boy has been picked up by my other half. Dinner, bedtime starts 6.30-7. Boy asleep by 8.
Wed - same but i pick him up at 4 and give him dinner by 5.
Thurs - wake at 8. Slow morning. Go hangout in play cafes/parks/kid friendly museums for the day. Bed as above.
Friday - boy is at pre school 8.30 -3.30. A day to myself! For shopping/housework/hobbies.
Sat and sun is similar to thurs, but my other half and i alternate lie ins. We see friends with kids, have a day out or just mooch.
It's easier now boyo is older.

And yes, I’m rather excited for DS to go to school in sept although he’s going to be even more knackered than ever!!! But PPs are right, it all passes.

Kids are 6 and 4. I work part time.
On a work day:
Get up at 7.00am. Get kids dressed and make breakfast. Get myself showered and dressed while they eat. Put on wash load. Deposit 6yr old on school bus. Take the bus to work. DH takes 4yr old to nursery (she does 3 hours in the morning)
Come home 5.30-6.00ish. DH has dinner on the table. Eat dinner with kids. Help 6yr old with homework. Get them both bathed and do bedtime routine. Wash dishes, clean kitchen, fold and put away laundry. Watch GoT in bed while eating biscuits and drinking wine from 9pm onwards.
On a home day:
Get up at 7. Same morning as above except I also take 4yr old to nursery.
Get home at 8.45 and enjoy 3 hours on my own! Eat breakfast, do housework etc..
Pick up 4yr old at 11.30 and do lunch (normally "snacky-lunch" of bread and butter, apple pieces, bit of cheese etc)
Go out to the park or playgroup for a bit. Pick up 6yr old from bus stop. Homework, make tea, washing up. DH does bedtime routine.

I've been where you are OP and it does get easier.

I have four dc aged 14,8,5 and 4.
It does get easier and you relax a lot more,weekends for us are great now everyone sleeps all night, the little ones wake around 7.00 and go downstairs and watch tv or go on an iPad.
8 year old gets them all a drink or they get a smoothie themselves and fruit if they are hungry.
We get up around 8.30 everyone gets themselves ready and makes their beds.
Then we usually do something together as a family.
Both dh and I get lots of leisure time and time to ourselves.
I hope that gives you hope?!
I remember how hard the early days are, I had a just 4 year old, a 13 month old and a new born at home with me plus a nine year old at school.
I literally used to count them in and out of the car as I was worried I would forget someone in the school car park

My DS is 3.5 months, he sleeps 10pm - 4am (feed), 6/7am feed, on/off sleep and snuggles in bed until 9/10am. I use this time to do any work I need to do (I support my mums business), order food shopping, anything I need on amazon etc.

We usually leave the house around midday and have a walk and do an activity like baby yoga, sensory, baby cinema, hartbeeps etc

Then come home around 3pm, have a tidy up and make tea for my partner who gets in 7pm ish. If he is awake and wants to play I put him on his play mat and do the washing up etc ... he's usually happy like this for 10-15 mins.

I do find it a very long intense day... but I try to do some activities out the house so I have something to build up to during the day. I also get very lonely if I spend days in by myself with my son...

My ds is 17.... (I know) and we probably only have a couple of hours contact a day unless it's a special occasion or holiday. You won't be feeling it now, but I am very nostalgic for the time that he needed me most of the day. Don't wish it away is what I'm trying to say.

I’d also add, DD now does amazing (to me) things like request ABBA songs by name (no idea who taught her, wasn’t me), call out for her friends when we see them on the street, follow instructions in English and DH’s language, ask for bananas. It’s magical - once they start giving more back it evens things out a little bit. (Even if I now have to listen to more bloody ABBA than the ushers at Mamma Mia.)

Mine are 14 and 12. Normal day (school day) tends to be:-

7.00am Wake up/breakfast/dressed (they do all that by themselves)
8.15am Drop to school
3.15pm They walk home from school or I pick them up
Don't really see them again until dinner at 6 unless they want to chat or have clubs to go to/friends houses to be dropped to.
6.30pm Homework
9.30pm Bed

It definitely gets easier

I have 1 in secondary and 2 in primary. I work part time.
The typical day is the usual get up in the morning, get ready for school, have breakfast, go to school, come home, do an activity, chores. homework and mooch around. Have dinner with them, watch tv together, bed read.

Mostly it’s pleasant. Sometimes there’s drama and shouting.

Every day is fine but what makes it really lovely is the weekends and holidays. Those moments when you’re all away from the humdrum and just be free to enjoy the wonder, joy and laughter in the world.
That might sound cheesy but it’s the best thing.

And yes I do my own thing all the time. I remember being where you are and how frustrating it was!

Ds is 10 months, sleep is not ideal at the moment.

Monday - got up at 6, bottle, play, breakfast. Nap with me 8-9.30. More playing and reading books. Lunch at 12, had a friend and baby for play date and we went for a walk. Dinner at 5, bath and bed for 7.

Tuesday - wake, feed and nap same but slightly different time. Impromptu visit from friend so we took babies for a picnic, and a long walk. I made a hig portion of stew so i had some in freezer for him. Dinner and bed as before.

Weds -shopping with friend and baby, lunch at theirs, baby group in afternoon and dinner at friends

Today -swimming this morning then grandparents had him for afternoon until dinner time whilst I cleaned house.

Tomorrow were meeting friends at soft play mid morning, will probably go back to someone's house.

That's a fairly typical week for us. Ds naps with me or in carseat/pram if out so I dont get time to do bits then. I've always made sure to let him have some time playing by himself and hes more than happy crawling around and causing havoc whilst I'm in the room doing bits.

It gets easier, from about 4 months I would say! Ds started to go to bed at around 6.30 from 6 months so other than popping up a few times to resettle him, dh and I basically have the evenings to ourselves.

OP I am glad you have made this thread because I feel exactly the same as you! I can’t seem to see how my 7 week DD will ever sleep for longer than 90mins without waking.

Oh god it gets so much better. I wanted to swap my 3 month for a 5 year old so badly so much of the time Hang in there, I PROMISE you will have a life again. Promise promise.

It's sooooooo intense at the beginning . Totally immersive. You don't feel like you have a moment to think or just...be.

Anyway. DS turning 2 in June. I work 2 days a week and he goes to nursery.

During our days together..up at 6/7 depending. Milk, play, breakfast. ALWAYS a toddler group in the morning. Always. Between 0930 and 1130. Then home for lunch. He's 50 50 on naps atm. Sometimes has a few hours sometimes refuses. In the afternoon we tend to go out somewhere local or play at home just the two of us. I used to have to be out all the time as I found it so incredibly dull stuck at home,but sometimes I'll find we've passed 3 or 4 hours just playing, crafts, cooking, "helping" with chores. He is getting marginally better at entertaining himself for (literally) 5 minutes at a time.

I started to feel like I could "breathe" when he was around 12 months and I went back to work. When he goes to bed I am totally able to switch off, read books, write. I exercise too...also felt more myself when I stopped breastfeeding. Even now, when we spend time together, I don't find it "relentless" in the same way...i can daydream and think about other stuff while paying him attention.

Rambling answer but in short, I think it gets easier wayyy quicker than when they are school age.

I’ve got a 4yr old and a 4 month old, currently on mat leave but the eldest is in nursery 4 days a week so mainly just me and the baby.

These are all approx times of how our day would go

630. DS2 wakes, plays in cot/cuddles in bed, feed 7/730. DS1 wakes, we have breakfast and i start the long task of making him get dressed. DS2 generally back playing in cot and watching the bedlam. I also get a shower and dressed.
631. DH and DS1 leave. I get DS2 dressed and play 9-10. Naptime. I sit down and have coffee, mumsnet and any life admin which needs doing. 10-12. DS2 awake, feed and either will go out to a class/playgroup/softplay or meet a friend. If we do stay in he generally wants my attention at his time of day so normally play with him in between laundry etc 12-2. Naptime. Either at home when I have a break and lunch or if we haven’t been out I tend to try and do the food shop at this time or anything else he would find boring. 2-4. Repeat of 10-12 tho he’s more amenable to just having a kick on his play mat or in his chair in the afternoon 4-5. Pick DS1 up from nursery, DS2 will have a short nap somewhere along the way. 5-630. Both play/watch TV whilst I make tea for me and DH and endless snacks for DS1. 630-7. Bath, milk, stories and then bedtime for both.
632. WINE He will wake generally once, sometimes twice a night for a feed, could be at any time tho.

It gets easier, I promise. I felt like u with my first but once everything starts to settle down into place and naps become a bit more predictable then you will get some time for yourself back.

I found it easier to make that time when there was only one of them! This time I’m trying to find things to do with DS2 that I enjoy (exercise classes and yoga) rather than things that I think I SHOULD be doing, like bloody baby massage

Good luck xx

I have 1 year old twins and our normal day is like this:
They wake up 630/7ish, dh takes them down whilst I shower. 745 dh to work, i do breakfast
830 all upstairs get them dressed teeth etc.
Head out 930/10 to park or playgroup.
12 home for lunch
1-3 nap - during this time I clean, do washing etc then Netflix
Pm out for park or play in the garden
Tea 5
Then bath and bed at 7.

I have found things have got a lot easier the last couple of months, I think partly because I've got used to my new life! I also get out every day now which makes things miles better!