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Dc forgotton birthday

2 replies

CoPuss · 01/05/2019 18:50

MIL is sometimes hard work and I’m sure she thinks the same of me, but we get on fine 95% of the time.

Not much of a backstory except to say she is a very unorganised person in that she won’t really make plans just turns up, always running late, doesn’t budget properly etc. And she previously didn’t buy xmas gifts for dc due to having no money (no issues with that at all) expect she promised they would come later and they never did - over 2 years ago.

Oldest Dc (10 & 12yo) had a birthday a week apart a couple of months ago, she came over to see 10yo on their birthday with some thoughtful gifts even though she is in a bad position financially. For 12yo birthday she was abroad volunteering so wished them happy birthday and said would get present and card to them on her return a few days later.

But it’s never been mentioned by her again, and 12yo hasn’t seen her since. I don’t know if the 12yo remembers she hasn’t got him anything.

Would you say something? If she hadn’t bought sibling gifts the week before it would be different. And when I was growing up one auntie didn’t get me anything despite buying for my siblings and I remember being so upset about it. I’d hate ds to feel the same.

I know she’s not got much money just now but she’s feeding her animals fresh meat & pies from bakeries so I’m sure she could buy a packet of haribo and a card for him to show she’s remembered.

Name changed (hopefully) as outing and I could be being a thoughtless cow.

OP posts:
mimibunz · 01/05/2019 18:58

She’s volunteering abroad but has no money. Ok. I would ask her or remind her. It wouldn’t matter as much if she’d forgotten both DC but she didn’t and the current situation could be interpreted as favouring one child over the other.

CoPuss · 01/05/2019 19:04

She’ll have just forgotten but if I remind her there will be excuses to make me feel bad i think, as DH says nothing is her fault. But we don’t keep in touch as much as we should so not perfect.

Yes that was an issue, she was in Spain and thought she would get expenses back & she didn’t, even though she didn’t ask, so was left asking for money from SIL on her return. So the birthday was probably last thing in mind.

OP posts:
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