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What do I do?!

6 replies

Throwitthen · 28/04/2019 18:54

Hello, I’ve name changed for this post as I’m embarrassed to be in this position.

My husband of 10 years left last week. I have 2 kids (under 10). I work part time on a low-ish salary. Youngest starts school this year so always planned to go full time after that and I will do so.

Now DH has left I’m in the shit financially. Whilst he will pay for the kids (he’s on 18k himself so won’t get much) I’m going to have to claim benefits to get me through until I can improve my earnings.

The problem I have is a bank account I’m named on. A relative is completely mentally incapable and lives in a nursing home. I have power of attorney and a joint bank account to pay their fees/buy toiletries etc. There is a large sum of money in there which I know (And understand why) this will prevent me claiming any help as it looks like I have savings. However, this money is not mine. Never has been, never will be. Legally, morally in any way I cannot/do not/will not use this money for myself.

If I remove myself from the bank account (not sure I can do this without the joint holders consent which they can’t physically give) it will look like I’m hiding assets. I will ring and ask advice tomorrow but just wondered if anyone knew what the rules around this might be?

Do I apply online and hope they don’t check all my bank accounts I have access to? Declare it and hope they believe me that it’s not my money? Ask the solicitor to write a letter supporting this?

I’m so stressed and have no idea how we will cope if I’m not able to claim anything!

Thank you in advance if you can offer any help!

OP posts:
TheQueef · 28/04/2019 18:55

Just declare it.
They will check.

Throwitthen · 28/04/2019 19:31

Will they believe that it’s not my money though, I can see why they wouldn’t

OP posts:
Knittedfairies · 28/04/2019 20:13

You won't be the only person in this situation. Give them a call tomorrow and ask their advice.

Interested in this thread?

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oneforthepain · 28/04/2019 20:53

It's not your money. It's not a matter of belief.

Hidingtonothing · 28/04/2019 20:57

I would have thought proof of POA would resolve any potential problems, ring and ask tomorrow but I don't think you need to worry Flowers

Throwitthen · 28/04/2019 21:05

Thank you everyone

OP posts:
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