OP i really sympathise. My DS was exactly the same. By 9 months i had a month left before I went back to work and I couldn't cope any more. He BF constantly still in the night, I had his cot next to the bed but he wouldn't sleep longer than an hour in it and I just put him in with me through exhaustion by about 11pm. I had no evening, no time to myself, behind with everything in the house, and felt ill with exhaustion. I didn't want to do CC, and after reading many mumsnet threads I went with a method by Andrea Grace - she has a book worth reading, but here's briefly what I did.
The goal is to teach him how to fall asleep on his own and break the feed sleep association:
1 - consistent routine. Bath, pjs then last feed downstairs, so he's not associating it with bed. If he falls asleep at the end gently wake him, though mine woke up taking him upstairs and putting him into sleeping bag anyway.
2 - place into cot awake. This will be hard. He's no idea how to fall asleep on his own, and he'll protest! I dreaded this as I thought mine would scream all night. In fact, it took 45 mins for him to fall asleep. Don't leave him - you can hold and stroke his hand, sing, cuddle over the cot, but don't pick him up. This is where you'll feel horrible, but you're teaching him how to fall asleep by himself, and he's going to tell you off as he's never done it before. When you put him in the cot asleep - as I used to try too - he wakes up, doesn't know how he's got there, and then gets upset. By falling asleep on his own, he knows he's in the cot, and will be able to learn to get himself back to sleep if he does wake.
3 - Same method with the night wakings - comfort in cot, but don't pick up. I just sat next to cot shushing and stroking his hand, and he actually went back to sleep. I think about 3am I really couldn't settle him so did a quick feed, but again back into cot awake, and same routine again. I did 1 night feed for about a week I think, then I stopped having to do that one too. If I hear him cry in the night, I wait for just a minute, and half the time I don't hear anything else and he goes back off. If he carries on I go in.
4- When up for the day, open curtains in room, saying good morning etc so they know its daytime and feed time now, then take downstairs for feed.
First night was 45 min to get to sleep with about 4 night wakings/one feed. This reduced to around 15 mins to get to sleep after a week, with one night feed. After 2 weeks no night feeds with the odd wake up.
Her method includes gradual retreat, so over days moving further from cot until you can lave the room straight away, but I haven't actually done that yet! He now takes 5-10 mins to fall asleep, and sometimes he still cries for a minute, but I just pat the mattress and he lies down and grabs my hand.
He now sleeps from 7 to somewhere between 5-6. I actually have an evening again to myself (just used to go to bed early in the hopes of any sleep I could get). Sometimes he wakes once or twice, but I can get him back to sleep easily sitting by cot and shushing.
I also think that by BF so much at night, he wasn't hungry in the day, and so it became a vicious cycle. By 8 months he was still barely eating any solids as he filled up on milk. Now he eats loads in the day!
Disclaimer - obviously all babies are different and i can't guarantee what works for me will for you, but if you're anything like I was I'm sure you're ready to try anything! I liked this method as I was able to reassure and comfort DS that is was OK to go to sleep on his own while gently giving him the message that night time wasn't feeding time anymore. I hope things get better for you soon OP xx