How can I make maternity leave less boring?

[Boredonmaternityleave]

DD is almost 8 weeks old. I’ve been on maternity leave for 11 weeks as DD was overdue.

I’m on SMP and am totally broke. I also didn’t do NCT as we couldn’t afford it and I don’t know anyone with babies. I’m back at work on the 4th September.

I tried to go to a free group today but whenever I try leaving the house DD needs feeding or changing, no matter how early I try to leave. Leaving the house with her is a nightmare.

I’m applying for work from home positions like surveys and CV writing etc to bring a bit of extra money in but I don’t know what else to do. I’m so bored and I feel bad for DD as well. There’s only so many walks you can go on!

I don’t know what I’m going to do for the next 4 months. Suggestions please

Get to baby groups. No one minds if you turn up late! It will get easier to leave the house.

Read books libraries are normally good to put babies down / have toilets etc / I learnt lots of new recipes to cook / do puzzles / crafts. I also went to baby cinema but that costs some money. Go to any free groups you can. Go swimming if it's not too many £££. Most babies wake up a bit more from 10ish weeks so they become a bit more company too.

there's usually a local mums page on facebook that lists local groups. and nct offers sensory sessions, buggy walks and baby massage at low or no cost.

it won't be long before dd is in more of a pattern so you can anticipate the next feed etc and get out more easily.

our library does a few groups, reading and singing and also an informal meet up for parents of pre-crawlers. doesn't matter if you're not there at the start.

Thanks all.

I’m definitely going to check a free group out tomorrow. I’m worried that because I didn’t do NCT I won’t meet anyone or make any friends also worried I’ve left it too late as well since DD is nearly 8 weeks

Where abouts do you live? I set up a page to meet other mums in my city. Could you see if there is anything similar near you?

8 weeks is very young to be pressuring yourself to get anywhere on time.
Go easy on yourself. Our library has lots of free groups. Some I hated but persevere a couple of weeks to really see how you feel. I met two close friends on the time I said "that's it this is my last visit to this crappy group"

I never did NCT, didn't get out to groups till DD was about 3 months old, I met and made friends I still keep in touch with now DD1 is 5 (despite having moved).
Dont pressure yourself!

8 weeks is young, don't worry! Nobody minds if you're late to groups - or if you don't want to see people just yet,head to the park! Babies tend to sleep well outside, I used to stroll around until ds1 fell asleep then sit with a book, and actually made a good friend that way too.

Also don't worry that everything has to be perfect before you go. With 4dcs, I often have to leave knowing that I might need to stop on the way to have a feed or a change soon - sometimes it actually helps to make them more patient too.
The Mush app is free and has lots of mums in your position too..
Just remember you're not alone! Many other mums will be feeling similar, you're in the very early days still and doing well

Also -

Thanks!

That does make me feel better.

I’ve been on a massive google frenzy so I’ve found somewhere to try out for the rest of the week.

Feeling a bit low at the moment so
I know I need to get out. Worried about how I’ll be at this group as I’ve not had to make new friends since I was at uni (10 years ago) and so socially awkward. Fingers crossed!

That's great! Making friends with babies is so much easier than it usually is as an adult - you have loads of things to start conversations about. Some new mums get very snobby about how people at baby groups just want to talk about baby poo and nap timings, but it's not true (although at various times I have been a bit obsessed with both!), it's just that they're easy openers.
Give people a chance, start by saying how people look well, or do something well, or note something cute about their baby, and often they'll be lonely and awkward too and thrilled to chat.

I had real social anxiety until I had my DD. Since then I've made lots of friends. There's always something to talk about with babies around. Just compliment the baby's outfit or ask how old they are. Easier said than done though and I do appreciate it can be hard.

Even popping to the shop or rhyme time at the library would give you a change if scene. At that age I loved going to a cafe with my babies. £2 for a cold drink and you might get chatting to someone. Obviously not every day though.

I was lucky that I had my DCs 8 and 5 years ago when the children's centres (sure start) offered free activities every day, literally. Baby massage, sensory play, music groups. Now it is different in my area but people I know with babies use the church hall type groups a lot. Pay £1 and get a hot drink and a biscuit. Usually there's a kind group of people. Nobody minds if you're late.

Do you have a local Facebook group of mums which you could join to find out about stuff going on?