Relationship advice please

[Sandy21]

Hi there I've being in a relationship for 7 years and I cheated last year I regretted it the min it happened but I know that's no excuse I was in a very deep place in life it really wasn't me so for our family sake (2 kids) we put it behind us and worked things out now I thought it was going so well lately I felt as we were back where we were years ago and nothing or no-one mattered more to us then each other besides the kids obvs I've built my life round him and our 2 kids I'm constantly reminding him how much I do love him and he has being showing it back into tonight I found msgs from him telling my cousin she's hot and that he would like to see her some time he even asked if she was up for a phone call now this cousin lives in a different country and she wasn't leading him along but she agreed that she wouldn't tell he texted. Now what do I do should I just take this as punishment for my wrong or does this mean our relationship just isn't going to work I am heartbroken my head is all over the place I don't know what to do 😭😭

@Sandy21 this is a very tricky situation. And it will be hard whatever the outcome you chose. However, from my perspective I see it as that the number one rule is family members are completely and utterly across the line. Although you cheated, which wasn't all the best but you do see that. He is appearing to be cheating with your cousin. Which is poor on both of their behalves. I say you take it up with the cousin and confront her with no one around and without your husband and kids not knowing. And filing out what happened then taking it from there x hope this helped some way

Why are you checking his phone firstly. Second maybe he is expecting you to cheat again or isn’t feeling secure with you. Third maybe he only stayed for the children. Most of all though your relationship isn’t in a good place, you need to be honest and talk to him about all this

@mc15 no I very much know what I done was wrong and I really have proved myself to him that it was a huge mistake and one that will never happen again. This cousin lives in a different country I don't even know why he was texting her because as far as I know they have never spoke before I'd even met in person x. @Alicewond I wasn't checking up on his msgs I use his Instagram account regularly and when I went to go on it tonight he refused to give me the phone which in the whole 7 years of our relationship neither of us ever had an issue of either of us using each other's phones, So yes it did play on my mind until I got his phone, I would never even read his msgs but obviously when I saw my cousins name i was going to read them to see what it was about. I know he is going to just blame it all on my cheating and make me feel like the bad person and that it's all my fault 😥