Shorts under school summer dress?

[mommathatwearspink]

DD (5) goes back to school after half term tomorrow and will be going back in her Summer dress. I’ve heard friends talking about their daughters wearing white modesty shorts under their school summer dresses... I didn’t know this was a thing?? Should I invest in some for DD or are knickers adequate on their own??

No, don’t. Don’t start teaching your daughter that there’s something wrong with someone seeing your knickers. The knickers are there to provide your genitals with a bit of privacy - if someone sees them, job done. Knickers don’t need privacy. Same as bikini bottoms or leotards. They ARE the privacy.

The reply to ‘I can see your knickers’ is ‘...and?’...

Secondly, there’s no need for your DD to be hot and sweaty in her pants region or to have another thing to deal with when using the toilet.

Just make sure her pants fit her well and don’t gape when she sits down. Seeing pants is one thing, seeing everything they’re meant to be covering is something else.

Why so grumpy WeepingWillowWino? Your personal response to the word "flash" is just that. It does not in my view contribute in any serious way to the sexualisation of young girls, especially as the context here is a discussion between mothers.
And unfortunately if you think uniform helps hide the students who come from poor families you are mistaken.

Every school I know of around here allows girls to wear uniform shorts like the boys. Knickers, shorts, school polo or t-shirt. Comfy and practical for active children of any gender.

errr - I don't think that? Obviously - I'm very averse to uniform and am perfectly aware that uniform doesn't hide who has money and who doesn't.

Saying that girls 'flash' their knickers is a highly suggestive thing to say, it implies deliberation on the part of the girls, it makes them active, the verb applies to them, not to others. Better to say that others might catch a glimpse of a girl's underwear.

Language matters, especially with regard to socialization. You're laying the 'blame' for others' reaction to this at the door of the girls - and we all know where that leads.

No, don’t. Don’t start teaching your daughter that there’s something wrong with someone seeing your knickers. The knickers are there to provide your genitals with a bit of privacy - if someone sees them, job done. Knickers don’t need privacy. Same as bikini bottoms or leotards. They ARE the privacy

The reply to ‘I can see your knickers’ is ‘...and?’...

Secondly, there’s no need for your DD to be hot and sweaty in her pants region or to have another thing to deal with when using the toilet

Just make sure her pants fit her well and don’t gape when she sits down. Seeing pants is one thing, seeing everything they’re meant to be covering is something else

Yes, totally agree.

My Reception Year DD has been refusing to wear skirts or dresses/pinafores. When I tried to find out why, she said everybody will see my pants (that was the part of the year when tights were worn!) I promptly got her white shorts to wear underneath her dress. Obviously this is a thing at school :(

I don’t want her to feel uncomfortable

Weepy the use of the word "flash" is not in and of itself suggestive. It does not imply deliberation on the part of the girls, just the fleeting nature of the event. A flash in the pan is not the fault of the pan; I was laying no blame anywhere other than at the society in which we live which choses to sexualise young girls! The suggestion that I am some how supportive of narratives that justify violence against women and girls is insulting!

I also remember my DD mentioning people in her class laughing at somebody’s pants on show in pre-school! I brushed it off then as it was children of four and sometimes three years of age. So she just wore normal underwear underneath her summer dresses. She didn’t make too big a fuss of it. Now this year, in Reception, she started to refuse to wear dresses. If it is this uncomfortable for her, I am happy to provide shorts.

At my sons Primary (where his sister also went) after about Y3/4 the girls tended to wear shorts the same as the boys in summer

The suggestion that I am some how supportive of narratives that justify violence against women and girls is insulting! Quite!

Im not keen on shorts under dresses.. as I think they are kids, but my dd in year 4 insists that she wear them, as she does cartwheel and climbing frame... so I had to get her some.. as it’s her choice and if she’s comfortable than she wears them.

I don't understand why it is okay to see little girls underwear (albeit fleetingly), but we then wouldn't allow boys to runaround without shorts/trousers on.

Not letting them have shorts could be seen as sexist as it means that girls could be too embarrassed to be able to have active play in the playground rather than having to sit and chat so they aren't accidentally showing off their underwear.

You can get playsuit dresses from marks .. they seem to solve the problem .

My 5 year old is wearing a play suit she loves it, comfortable and practical. And she can easily unzip it to go to the loo.

I still don't understand how it can be easy to go to the lavatory in a playsuit.
Unlike the pyjamas I had when I was 2or3, which had a buttoned flap at the back.

Nobody bothers with shorts under dresses at dd’s primary, thankfully. Or not so I’ve noticed anyway. She’s in year 4, so I think it would have come up by now.

It seems ridiculous to me.

The playsuits we bought are zip-up and pretty easy to get on/off. My 6yo has no trouble going to the toilet when wearing it. Yes a skirt/dress is probably slightly easier particularly if the child struggles with dressing etc. but she prefers shorts/playsuits and has never struggled.

Re unsuitable uniforms: Uniforms in Primary schools were mostly restricted to Church schools in the 60s, 70s, and 80s. It was only in the 90s uniforms started to be adopted by State Primaries. Neither I nor my DD (39) wore uniform at Primary. The school where I taught held a vote and it was the parents who decided to have a school uniform, now most schools do. Parents, it is in your hands.

Uniform for primary school is only 'agreed' iirc so they can wear what they like.

We'd have never got out of the door if there hadn't been a uniform

We'd have never got out of the door if there hadn't been a uniform
Which is probably why parents voted for it.

But you would. It took hardly any time for DD to get to grips with what did and didn't work for school or her activities. We lay out her clothes the night before and she would say 'no tights, Mummy, we've got swimming after school' and so we'd swap for something else. Clothes are bought cheaply from supermarkets or H&M.

She's Year 4 now and for most of the girls in her class they just wear a t shirt and leggings or shorts, and trainers or sandals. Only a small number of girls are actively interested in clothes and fashion, most simply couldn't care less. Nothing in the way of fads or fashions that must be followed (I only read about JoJo Bows on MN and had to look them up, never saw them at school), no judgement on what anyone is wearing.

Clothing is an absolute non-issue, and the staff waste no time in policing it, and I waste no head space on it - except when I read the endless uniform threads on here and thank God none of it is my problem .

Honestly - it is not the headache everyone thinks it is.

And yet there arent any more of those parents who leg it down the road 5 minutes after the whistle went in mufti days than there are any other day.

Are schools in other countries all like some deserted derelict building because all the kids are at home scratching their heads wondering what to wear?

Are the British somehow incapable of making decisions as trivial as what black hoody to wear that day
I suppose it's a good idea surgeons wear scrubs really. Or people would never get their operations

Knickers are fine. If the school have a problem then they should let girls wear more practical uniform items than dresses.

SarahTancredi, I grew up in a country which didn’t have school uniform. And it definitely showed it up to everybody who were the less well off kids. It was just another way to show off what your parents can afford which the others couldn’t. It was another source of bullying for the less affluent kids.

It was just horrible as there is nothing you could do as a child to get better expensive trainers or an infinite variety of expensive outfits to model at school.

As somebody who lived it, I am most grateful that this nasty source of competitiveness is removed by my children’s English school. And the uniform is actually practical, comfortable and well made. So sorry don’t agree with you on that one.