Feeling sad

[WithAllIntenseAndPurposes]

As yet another refusal to have the kids by my parents so me and my husband can do something for a special occasion
I know they aren't obliged to help but it's the latest in a long line where I'm told I shouldn't expect anything and I'm so so nasty and selfish
Please tell me I'm not alone here

Just start using babysitters........

Pay for a baby sitter for a weekend away?

Book a babysitter, ask for reccs from friends or local community.

Don't bother asking parents for support, they're clearly not on board with it.

Make your own life independent of them, jfdi.

No friends who you can call on to have a sleepover?

Take the kids with you.

Sorry they don’t help out but that’s life for many people with kids.

Our parents help out babysitting whilst we go out for a meal, but 3 years into being parents and we’ve never had a weekend away together.

That's just life, we have no-one we could ask.

I have no parents to ask. Sleepover swaps with friends? That way you both get e free weekend..

Presumably DH's parents can't help either?

My dc are 15 and 12 and me and dh haven't had a night off yet! Not the same as you because I've never asked for anyone to have them. My mum has always been clear that she's happy to babysit but doesn't want to do over nighters. Mil was just too frail and unused to small children to have them.

Now my dc are huge, it won't be long til we can just leave them at home alone for the night! I won't pretend it would have been nice to have the odd night off. It was a bit of a pai to have to refuse invitations to child free weddings away from home or to be the first ones to leave a night out as we had to be home for 11. But it wasn't a big deal.

Try not to feel too sad. It sounds like your parents have been unkind in the way that they've refused you but you're right, they aren't obliged to help you out.