How to deal with a mother that’s quite preachy and leachery

[Lardlizard]

It gets quite annoying

Give us examples of what she says?

Did a double-take on leachery, thinking you meant lechery

Examples would help. And remember you can be too polite; it's fine to tell someone who is being rude that they are being rude. After all theyre not worrying about upsetting you are they.

leachery do you mean she lectures you? Or does she go around ogling men?

I think it's important to know before we can give advice.

Haha I mean she lectures
Hard to give examples as you kind of have to be there to take inthe tone etc

In that case, you can either tune her out or change the subject - you know, just don't engage and hope she'll take the hint. Humour her - nod and smile and once again don't engage. Or take the bull by the horns and politely but firmly state that you are an adult, you appreciate that she cares and wants to help you, but you don't need to be told what do like a small child.

My mum has a tendency to do this, so I sympathise.

Stop listening! Hang up the phone or leave the room after you tell her you will not be spoken to like a daft child.

Use phrases like 'that's interesting but I think we all have to find our own way to do things'
or 'Oh really ? I do it this way - but each to their own'
or 'It's one of those things where people have lots of different opinions don't they? I just do my own thing and it seems to be working fine'

(or 'shut up and bore off' if she won't take the hint )

I find a good ‘well they’re all so different’ helps with my friend who likes to bitch sting me with parenting tips I.e.- I mention DD loves Nightgarden and she wants in about how her husband read this article about how tv before 2 is terrible for speech development and how her pfb won’t be watching anything, at all, until after two years old.

I’m a bit petty and quite often drop into the conversation how advanced DDs speech is (I would usually rather die than be that parents she just brings out this horrible side of me).

I say absolutely nothing, give her a blank look until she's finished and continue or start a new topic and don't aknowledge anything she's just said. Same on the phone, I just go silent until she's finished and wrap up the call. Texts are great because I can just ignore them completely.

Then I carry on doing my own thing.

Say

Well that’s the way YOU do it. I do it differently.