Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Flip

Original poster

Child neglect prosecution

19 replies

Worriedmum201 · 13/04/2019 23:04

I have name changed for this as very outing.

Not sure I’ve added it in right place.

Long story short, DS was at his dads today and he was caught drink driving with ds in his car. Not only is he facing drink driving charges but they are going for prosecution of neglect.

Ss will be involved.

Does anyone know where I stand with this having a reasonable contact order? Am I breaking it by stopping contact or is a prosecution enough to protect my child from this man?

Sorry if it’s garbled I’m in a state of shock

OP posts:

mummymummymummummum · 13/04/2019 23:05

When is contact next due? Do you have time to seek advice before then? If social services are going to get involved I'd speak to them and see what they advise in the short term.

Original poster

Worriedmum201 · 13/04/2019 23:21

Wouldn’t be for another couple weeks as it was during contact this weekend. Exp is currently locked up

OP posts:

Original poster

Worriedmum201 · 13/04/2019 23:46

Doubt I’m getting much sleep tonight

OP posts:

yellowsun · 14/04/2019 00:46

How worrying for you I am sure that SS will be in touch during the week. They may do an assessment which will may involve safety planning. This might include supervised contact, for example, at another family members house or with them present. This is assuming that you don’t share contact 50/50.

If you don’t hear anything from them in the morning, you can always ring and see if SS have received a referral from the police.

StillMe1 · 14/04/2019 00:58

Are you worried about having to hand your child over to a person who would drive them about after drinking alcohol?
I think you would have to get a variation on the decision for contact with the exp.
I would definitely get on to SS first thing and discuss the situation. Have they had previously involvement? Does your child have extra needs. This help get access stopped if the exp cant act responsibly

Original poster

Worriedmum201 · 14/04/2019 07:04

This is the third time ss have been involved with him and I have still allowed contact to go ahead afterwards. Ds is 12 now and I’m struggling to persuade him to go anyway. This is the final straw in a long history of exp’s criminal behaviour and putting ds and his half brother in danger. The police contacted me and they have reported it to ss. At the moment I’ve said all further contact takes place at his parents house pending advice from ss

OP posts:

Trull · 14/04/2019 07:35

I think SS will want to ask why, if this is the third time they’ve been involved with your ex on the grounds of neglecting your son, you’ve continued to allow contact.

Fraggle84 · 14/04/2019 07:43

I wouldn't be offering contact

He put your children in danger

Are they back with you now?

I'd be speaking to a solicitor on Monday

Waitingforinspo · 14/04/2019 07:45

Stopping contact would be seen as acting protectively.

NeverTwerkNaked · 14/04/2019 07:45

Of course you would be reasonable to withhold contact. Indeed you must.

But if you are at all worried then make an application to the court, set out those facts and ask the judge to make an order suspending contact. You can do it yourself, you don’t need a lawyer. Just set out the facts.

PinaColadaPlease · 14/04/2019 07:47

I’m surprised unsupervised contact has been allowed for this long.

yellowsun · 14/04/2019 09:27

Ah ok. At 12 and with your son saying he doesn’t want to see his dad, then you have even more grounds for stopping contact. I would stop it and apply to the court to change the court order. What do you think your ex’s reaction to contact ceasing would be?

mrsed1987 · 14/04/2019 09:38

I doubt ss will contact you today as its sunday, but they may well do during the week. Is there a court order re contact? If so you need to take some legal advice but imo you are justified in stopping contact and he would have to go back to court and prove otherwise.

Zoflorabore · 14/04/2019 09:42

I think the decision may be made for you op, hopefully.
What an absolute idiot. I hope they throw the book at him.

Original poster

Worriedmum201 · 14/04/2019 10:16

@Trull I don’t appreciate you insinuating that this is in any way my fault. It is court ordered contact which I was told I may be in breach of if I stopped it. The other issues were with his younger child not directly mine. As I said in op this is a very shortened version of what has happened and Social services themselves have never stopped the contact between them.

OP posts:

Original poster

Worriedmum201 · 14/04/2019 10:19

I don’t know what his reaction would be. Probably to take me back to court. It’s the financial side which worries me. I might ring a solicitor and get advice, which is what I did last time but I was advised I would be breaching order.

OP posts:

Karigan195 · 14/04/2019 10:24

You need legal advice now. I would not be sending my son to his dads if ds have been involved 3 times and he’s being prosecuted for child neglect. See a solicitor if you can and if you can’t go back to court to change the order yourself

spongedog · 14/04/2019 10:27

You are quite right to be very wary about breaching a court order on contact. Judges at the moment seem to be incapable of understanding that mothers who express concern over contact might just genuinely have those concerns. So it seems sensible to talk to SS first. Then re-apply to court for a variation, taking into account your son's wishes. They may ask for Cafcass involvement.

Trull · 14/04/2019 12:38

I ‘insinuated’ nothing, OP. The question I asked was an obvious one, based on the information you gave, and you had not said that the previous SS issues had concerned another child, not yours.

Flip