Posted here for traffic, Nc if you recognise me please don't out me.
I have OCD as per username. It's extremely severe at the moment to the point I'm barely leaving my bed.
Have had same cpn for a while, liked her at first but last few month feel she has become increasingly impatient with me and hasn't been listening to what I've said about what I'm experiencing and issues with meds.
Also been "reviewed" on meds by lower level psychiatrists who only met me once or twice and I've also felt didn't listen to me.
This has resulted in meds being unchanged for several months despite me asking for additional help. Part of this was I think they were determined to pressure me into taking a med I wasn't happy to take due to side effects and from other patients with same/similar history saying that it made the anxiety worse which is very last thing I need.
Currently I feel like I'm basically being threatened 'take the meds we're telling you to or else no support'
This is making me very anxious, distressed and honestly bloody angry!
I've been asking for months for other input too and today cpn tried to claim I hadn't asked until today which is bullshit.
So I'm wanting to speak to her line manager with a view to having a different cpn but also having the issues I have been raising for several months addressed.
Her timing dreadful too as very recent bereavement which she knows about.
I'm wondering if she's under some kind of pressure as me not getting better is seen as her under performing? So any cpns or similar reading I'd appreciate your thoughts on that?
I'd also like to know what to say in phone call to achieve what I want.
What I want is
A cpn that really understands the condition.
A cpn who has patience - even on phone calls regarding practical matters like arranging appointments current one can be very abrupt even hanging up when I'm still speaking
For the cpn and team to listen to what I'm saying about the difficulties with the meds.
They seem to have got it into their heads that I don't want to take any which isn't true. I've had really good experiences with some meds but unfortunately I've sort of become allergic to the ones I was using before so can't use them any more which is very frustrating. I don't expect no side effects (which one of the psychiatrists "reviewing" me blatantly said is what they thought of me! But there are certain side effects that would be extremely distressing for me and therefore counterproductive in terms of reducing anxiety even if they worked a little on that score) but I know which ones I can suck up and which ones would just be too much for me.
Cpn suggested using an advocacy service which to be honest I don't think should be necessary!
Also I'm now at a point where I'm more distressed after meeting sm cpn than less which I feel is what should be happening. She should be helping not making matters worse.
I feel like I'm being seen as a problematic patient that nobody wants "on their list" - is there a stats thing I need to be aware of? Is she getting grief for my not getting better?
Please please help as I'm feeling like I'm about to be abandoned by the very people supposed to help.