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Original poster

8 people and 3 bedrooms

74 replies

JUMC · 07/04/2019 11:57

Currently living in a 3 bedroom house with 6 children and DP and I. 4 DD's ages 13 months, 4, 8 and 15. 2 DS's ages 8 and 11. The current set up isn't really working, DP and I are in the smallest bedroom with our youngest who's getting a bit old to still be in with us. Then both boys are in one room and girls are in the other. DD15 is struggling to get homework and such done whilst sharing with DD4. DD8 and DD15 would like to continue sharing, DS8 wants to share with DD8, she's also happy with that as long as she's still with older sister. DD4 wants to share with DS11, he's not so keen on that because of her early bedtime and wanting to play on his xbox in his bedroom. The two bedrooms are quite big, big enough to fit a bunk bed and a single bed. I know some are a little old to be sharing with opposite sex but it's not seen as a big deal in our house and they're happy to. This isn't an ideal situation but won't be able to move for at least a few years

OP posts:

Palominoo · 07/04/2019 13:36

Oh for the old days when we could just take any spare children down to the market and sell them.

Op, are there grandparents nearby thzt can help as I suggested previously?

MyPatronusIsAnOrca · 07/04/2019 13:42

Could you create a homework/ chill out area for the 15 year old?

One of my friend’s has a desk etc set up under the stairs.

Or a log cabin/summer house in the garden ?

Hecateh · 07/04/2019 13:42

I grew up as one of seven kids in a 3 bedroom house. My eldest sister was 15 when the youngest was born.

We had 2 bunks in the biggest bedroom. bunks in the little bedroom and the youngest in a cot with parents in bed 2.

When the youngest got to about 2 we went to 4 boys in the big bed, 3 girls in the second and for a few years mum and dad were in bunks in the little bedroom (didn't strike me as odd at the time LOL)

This stayed the same for a while even after the older ones went off to uni as they were home for hols. It was only as the older ones got married it changed again.

Bedrooms were definitely only for sleeping in in winter as it was too cold up there to play pre central heating. We did have a separate dining room which was designated homework space during the week

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PCohle · 07/04/2019 13:43

To be honest I think being the child(ren) chosen to shipped off to a grandparents would be far more upsetting for a kid than sharing a room with a few siblings.

TSSDNCOP · 07/04/2019 13:55

Di you have the money to convert the attic? I'd make that priority 1 and be sleeping in the living room until then.

Palominoo · 07/04/2019 14:01

I didn't say ship the oldest child off to the grandparents as a permanent thing. I suggested a bedroom at the grandparents that the oldest child at 15 could access a couple of nights a week for some peace and quiet.

Original poster

JUMC · 07/04/2019 14:18

I'll have to look into loft conversions because I don't much about them but if that doesn't work out a shed or pod of some sort in the garden. Not sure about a bedroom there but maybe a space for homework/xbox/playing so bedrooms are more just used for sleeping. They do have sleepovers a lot during weekends, neither grandparents live near by but my sister does and they often have sleepovers with cousins there as there's a lot more space. In general they're happy to share and get on well it's just hard to find somewhere quiet to do homework

OP posts:

Hollowvictory · 07/04/2019 14:24

Our loft conversion cost £30k and that was 10 years ago. By no means a cheap option.

doctorsbag · 07/04/2019 14:28

Not a cheap option for a loft conversion but cheaper than moving maybe. Plus you are adding value to your house.

You could do the minimum you need to make it habitual and legal and then add to it in the coming years.

Hollowvictory · 07/04/2019 14:31

Yes and you can add the cost to your mortgage in some cases.

titchy · 07/04/2019 14:34

Why can't homework be done at the dining table? That's the obvious choice surely?

Original poster

JUMC · 07/04/2019 14:37

It can but it's not exactly quiet there so i thought an extra space might be a nice option

OP posts:

IceCreamAndCandyfloss · 07/04/2019 14:44

I'd look at getting a second job and moving. It's unfair on the children.

Smoggle · 07/04/2019 15:00

I'd prioritise the 15yo having her own room through her GCSEs and ALevels.
8 year olds can do homework at the kitchen table but 15 year olds need somewhere quiet.

Original poster

JUMC · 07/04/2019 18:22

I don't know if having her own room is realistic, space to do homework and revise is necessary of course but I'm sure plenty of GCSE and A level students share a room and still do just as well as those who don't

OP posts:

seriouslytiredandsore · 07/04/2019 18:35

I think the loft conversion would be my only option in this situation OP. I presume you own the home though? If you do could you remortgage to cover the costs?
If you are renting then I would look for somewhere bigger ASAP.

My best friend lived the same as this, 6 kids 3 bedrooms. They had 3 kids in each but it just wasn't suitable as the others got older and older.
She used to be embarrassed to bring people back and there were constant fights and mess, especially as they all entered their teens. Then boyfriends/girlfriends came into the mix and it was impossible.
She was relieved to leave home at 19.

Your kids might say they don't mind this now, but they will eventually. Especially the 15 year old.

Leeds2 · 07/04/2019 19:15

My friend had a glorified shed in her garden, that her DC used as a games room/place to entertain friends when they came over. It had electricity, and wi fi, but not used as a bedroom. I would look at something like that, but would also try and make sure that the 15 year old has a quiet place to study during exams.

MamaRaisingBoys · 07/04/2019 19:29

As an immediate short term solution for studying, can you fit a desk in your room for oldest dd? If you just use your room for sleeping no harm for her to escape there during the day/evening?

BruceAndNosh · 07/04/2019 19:33

Have you got a dining room you could convert to a bedroom?

Bingo!
Seriously, if the OP had a surplus dining room knocking about, don't you think she would have thought of using it?

Hellywelly10 · 07/04/2019 19:39

I like the shed idea they can use it for xbox, friends over to play etc. If you cant afford electric then run a extention lead to it.

Deadringer · 07/04/2019 19:45

I was raised in a huge family in a 3 bedroom house. A small 3 bedroom house. It was different times but, parents had smallest room, boys in one room, girls in the other, regardless of age. If you move the youngest in with their siblings could you put a desk in your bedroom and the eldest could study and do homework there, perhaps at set times during the day? I often see it suggested that parents can sleep on a sofa bed but I think adults need their own space too, especially for storage. If you can afford a loft conversion it would make a huge difference.

Angelinthenightx · 07/04/2019 19:47

Could u put a false wall up in any of the bedrooms or even in your livingroom to make a extra bedroom?

Angelinthenightx · 07/04/2019 19:50

I like the shed idea u can get like a garden house type thing we plan on doing this for our kids when they get a bit older.

MyDcAreMarvel · 07/04/2019 19:55

Op join this Facebook group
Large Families 4 or more children UK
it’s a lovely helpful group and you will get lots of advice/support. I have seven dc but luckily a six bed.

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