Has anyone on here ever run away/gone missing and returned?

[qwertyskirty]

I just wonder a lot about people who are missing and then return? What happens when you come back? I'm.guessing it's not all celebrations. Did being away help at all?
I suppose this is a fairly nosy question - although I spend A LOT of time fantasizing about just disappearing.

I haven't, however I have read something from someone who did. And the reaction when she got home was like everyone was watching her, was she going to do it again? People were angry at her.

Why do you want to disappear? Is there anything we can help with?

Only as a child, but I returned within the hour.

I have thought about this. Not going missing missing but taking myself off for a few days and letting people know this is what I am going. I have no young dc's or dc's at home

only as a child, 11 years old mom had annoyed me decided to leave home with 50p in my pocket, got on my bike rode all the way to the centre of Birmingham from Halesowen ( about Ten miles) hit a huge hill turned round went home and never did tell my mom i had left home

Yes. Well, sort of. My family knew the area I was in but not actually where I was probably for about a year and I didn't keep in touch. I was very unwell and in a dreadful place mentally but also in a horrifically abusive relationship. I escaped and came back eventually. Then went back again. Then got out for good. I can't even bear to think what I put my DM through. I was never "missing" officially but I know I was missed. If that makes sense.

It must be awful for the people around you and yes a sense of being watched/untrusted afterward too.

Yes, 10 years ago now, would not recommend it ever, you get a moment of relief when you get away from everything, then shit hits the fan, people are ringing everyone you know, then when you come back it's an understandable drama and then everyone when you come back boss, family, friends look at you, like your crazy. Which maybe i was but still not a plesant feeling.

Thanks Missing. Yes it's that feeling of relief I know I am fixated upon. But it isn't true relief really because of the inevitable shit / fan.
I hope things are better for you now? How did you handle the aftermath?

I'm really interested to hear people's stories too. I spend a lot of time thinking about this, just walking off into the sunset with my little boy..but my reality is, I would have nowhere to live and no way to support my son or myself
It's a nice fantasy though.

Yes it's that feeling of relief I know I am fixated upon. But it isn't true relief really because of the inevitable shit / fan.
I hope things are better for you now? How did you handle the aftermath?

I hope life gets less stressful for you soon, I know that to get to that point of even thinking about it life is tough. 💐

The aftermath was hmm interesting!! and lasted years I mainly got through it with alcohol and selfloathing, very healthy!

Re things getting better it wasn't straight away, but it is now I ended up "running away" from the problem again later in life but in a much more sensible and conventional way. I moved countries, told the relative that caused the most stress that I was moving away and that I wouldn't be in contact again. But kept in contact with good friends (but told them not to tell relative where I was moving to) and had a fresh start with a totally new career etc but in a much more normal less dramatic fashion. I'm far better now, I kept the support I needed (friends) but ditched the abusive one (relative) and left behind all the bad memories and links to that moment, job etc. it didn't need to be an all or nothing situation that I tried to do the first time, it's possible to move on but keep somethings if that makes sense. Moving away in an orderly fashion, planned, new job, place to live and starting to a fresh somewhere else = normal (ish) running away with thr clothes on your back and no plan = a complete cluster fuck!

It's a bit rambly as it still kind of messes with my head that period in my life, but the too long didn't read version is, the whole romantic idea of running away with no plan is awful, if you have to get away, there is more sensible ways, which are better for your mental health.

CaughtInHisTrap
I don't know if I'm reaching, but I'm basing this off your username, so I might be way off the mark, there are charities to help if you are in an abusive relationship, womens aid being one. Running away is sometimes the answer if it's done with support and not just blindly iyswim. Everyone deserves to be happy

I think about this often. I have come very close. I once drove to my local airport with just my handbag and passport after dropping the kids st school. I parked my car and tgen thought wtf am i doing.

I don't want to put my loved ones through the stress so will never carry it through but bloody hell it seems like an easy option some days.

I went missing a few times as an older teenager, and again as an adult (with MH problems).

As a teenager I managed a few days each time. I was embarrassed to find that the police had gone through all my stuff. My friends had their houses searched, rather forcefully in some circumstances as the police thought they could be hiding me.

I ended up being caught as a teen due to looking dodgy, younger than my years, and police not believing my story. People were angry with me for messing them around. I was ashamed and full of self hatred. Returning was awful. I spent time in police cells whilst waiting to be returned.

As an adult I went missing and eventually returned the calls of the specialist MH liaison officer and agreed to meet them. Getting a full on police escort to hospital was embarrassing. Again, I’d worried a lot of people. Worrying people you love is the worst bit. Wasting police time 2nd. Everyone was very nice that time around, but again I felt so ashamed.

So, if you are going to go missing I’d advise making sure people you really care about know, and are sworn to secrecy.

Yes. Kind of. I was 21 or so and in a very toxic relationship, he had even convinced me to move abroad with him away from my family and friends. Eventually I saw sense after a massive twatting and moved back to my home country.

A friend offered me a place to stay so I accepted, not ready to my face my family who he had wrapped around his little finger. But he called them and told them I was mentally ill and has jumped on a plane home. I didn't have a mobile phone (sold it to afford plane ticket) so my DM couldnt get hold of me and I didnt know that she was worried anyway!

She ended up calling the police, telling them my description, notable marks e.g. my tattoo. I only realised about all this when I got ambushed by police in town!

I was gutted I had put my mum through that tbh.