How do different cultures/countries view British kids?

[clairemcnam]

Just interested to know your experience of how different cultures/countries view British kids. I know my mum (complicated heritage) can't get over the amount of kids diagnosed here as disabled. I keep telling her that they still exist, but would not get diagnosed in other countries she lived, but I don't think she believes me. She was also shocked at first about the casual way kids here speak to parents.

I think that judging the behaviour of children on holiday is always going to be unfair as they’re likely to be tired, overstimulated, parents are more relaxed (or stressed) than usual etc. I used to work in a very touristy part of London and the worst behaved school parties were always French. But from what I hear about how strict French parents are I guessed they were just “cutting loose” while away from home.

On that basis I wouldn’t put any weight on how people from other countries or cultures judge British children as a whole unless they’ve actually lived here for a while.

Mrsfrumble - trust me the French kids I saw on French school trips in their own country - but away from their parents - behaved like little horrors.

I worked just past Madame Tussauds for a few years and can't recall which nation were most rude but when I was queuing to go in Chamber of Horrors a few years back as a teenager there were some French teenagers being nasty about us in French - which I understood as my French was excellent. My French friend Aude overheard them and snapped back at them in French as they'd assumed - I was with 2 other friends both English and Aude hated speaking English - we were all English. The looks on the French girls faces were priceless.

We are in the Middle East. Most of my colleagues from the Gulf think that:

• our kids go to bed ridiculously early
• that we are way too strict on ‘routine’
• that we should let our nanny deal with the kids when they are wake up in the night
• that our kids are really active and boisterous
• that we are really precious about insisting on car seats
• that we are too hung up on the idea of giving our kids healthy food/a balanced diet
• that we are crazy for letting our kids get dirty/wet etc when they are in the park

Our kids are 9 months and 3 years and I actually think we are pretty laid back... l!

My Dutch friend thinks that British parents are overprotective and that our kids go to bed very early.

As someone who emigrated to the UK from the US, I'm amazed at how relaxed and confident British kids are with adults. Not rude but casual in a way that can seem jarring to someone from the US or another country where kids are expected to show an automatic deference.

There are loads of little examples, but one illustrative moment was the time I parked in a road and as I was leaving my car a bunch of neighbourhood kids asked me to move my car up a few spaces because they wanted to play football there. Wow. They were perfectly polite and chill about it, but it blew my mind because 1. in the US kids wouldn't ask a known adult for a favour like that, and 2. Kids in the US wouldn't address an unknown adult at all . The second point speaks to a higher crime rate in the US unfortunately.

Well, I think that British kids in general (I'm talking teens) are fairly self confident, articulate, and sometimes a touch overdramatic.

Which is to say, pretty much like all teens the world over. . .

They do seem a bit 'older' than where I'm from in terms of drug and alcohol use, which is a bit disconcerting.

I'm Irish in Ireland but have friends in the UK so go over there quite a lot. I don't think there's much of a difference between British and Irish kids to be honest, except maybe funerals.
A lot of Irish kids (especially rural) would grow up going to funerals and wouldn't be phased by them, but I often see threads on here about whether or not people in the UK should bring their 10 year old to a funeral and I must admit to being a bit about that.

A child in my family is part Dutch

We found their parents approach rather unusual

I then read an article that Dutch children are the happiest because the parents are fully child led or something that it's their culture to place the childs wishes above all things. I'll see if I can link

I moved to the UK when I was eight, I remember friends being in bed at 7:30ish while I was out playing until 10pm most nights. Children from Pakistan are treated very differently, as a boy I could do as I liked, my sister however was a mini housemaid and had very strict rules. Pakistani children are generally very polite and will help strangers if someone appears to be in trouble. Boys are also encourage to be cuddly etc, you won’t hear phrases like man up etc.

Where I live children don’t seem to have any freedom to go anywhere on their own until they’re secondary school age, which seems a bit old, but I wouldn’t let my almost four year old out of sight, yet when I was that age I would walk to school and essentially vanish at weekends and pop back home for food.

A lot of Irish kids (especially rural) would grow up going to funerals and wouldn't be phased by them, but I often see threads on here about whether or not people in the UK should bring their 10 year old to a funeral and I must admit to being a bit confused about that.

I guess it would also be a regional thing as in my part of the UK (very Northern England) it's normal to take children to a funeral or at the very least to the wake afterwards and in many cases actively encouraged as "he/she would have wanted all the little ones to come and enjoy themselves". The last funeral I went to everyone was really put out at the function afterwards that I hadn't brought my then 1yo and I kept getting told "it's such a pity the baby couldn't come", my mother eventually drove home to collect her and reappeared 30 minutes later with the "baby" in a party dress. She was dutifully passed around the room, crooned over, given many £1 coins by various relatives, and fed lots of little cakes and sandwiches from the buffet. I was reminded by more than one of my older relatives that children are needed at funerals to remind everyone that life goes on and to cheer us all up afterwards, the funeral service is for being sad but the function afterwards is for laughing and remembering.

Where I live children don’t seem to have any freedom to go anywhere on their own until they’re secondary school age, which seems a bit old, but I wouldn’t let my almost four year old out of sight, yet when I was that age I would walk to school and essentially vanish at weekends and pop back home for food.

I think that's regional too. Children here are encouraged to start walking themselves to/from school from Year Four (age 8-9) and it's expected that they'll definitely do so from Year Five (age 9-10). All the children around here play outside without an adult actively supervising them, on a weekend my 7yo and 5yo will go out together to call on their friends and then they all play in the street. They'll pop in and out for the loo or a drink or to ask if they can have what looks like half the street in to play in the back garden. My 10yo isn't allowed to go around to the park on his own, he's autistic and needs a higher level of supervision, but all his friends go to the park on their own and to/from swimming on their own. I l do let him go but with still with a level of supervision, so I'll take my younger DC to the park and we'll play in an area where I can supervise him from a discreet distance.

I've heard that lots of cultures think British kids go to bed too early. My dc go to bed early I suppose..between 7.30-8.30....but they wouldn't get up in the morning for school if they went to bed any later. How do other countries deal with this or do they all have afternoon naps?!

My DC are all in bed by 9pm. 2yo and 5yo go between 6.30 and 7.30 depending on how tired they are, 7yo goes between 7pm and 8pm by choice, 10yo goes at 9pm. Any later and we see a definite deterioration in their behaviour due to tiredness.

Any later and we see a definite deterioration in their behaviour due to tiredness

Yes, same here. Tired children = grumpy children!

I do let them stay up late now and again if we're watching a film or for a treat or an event/party but I do it in the knowledge that I'll have to deal with whining and grumpiness. When we're on holiday and in school holidays they stay up later but have the luxury of sleeping longer in the morning rather than having to be up at 6.30 like they do on school days, even then though they'll reach a point after so many days where the grumpiness starts and I know they need an early-ish night.

I am a Brit in Italy. Italians think sending children to bed before the adults go is verging on child abuse. When dd was small I had a heck of a time convincing the Italian side of the family that she went to bed at 8.30-9 (at primary age- already late for UK kids) because a) she needed the sleep b) I needed DD free time.
The Italian teens I teach all think UK kids are pissheads who hang around outside McDonalds and then have babies at 16.

I work in an international college for part of the year and the worst behaved kids are the Italians and the Chinese. Both brought up to know they are the centre of the universe and can do whatever they want. Best behaved Japanese, always.

Going to bed early is a odd one. I think in many countries children at school are not discouraged from sleeping in the middle of the day. There are nap rooms and day naps are fine, sometimes enforced. Where as British kids are not expected to sleep during the day after toddlerhood. My mother is always shocked that my children and their friends can all be out playing at 10pm or out at restaurants on a school night. But many children under 11 in Brazil, mine included, go to school after lunch and stay until 5-6pm, so sleeping at 9 or 10pm is ok as they can still get 10-12 hours sleep.

Lets be brutally honest here.

You just have to spend two minutes beside the pool at any holiday resort. No offence, but the fat, red faced, sunburnt, loud and aggressive "British kids" (And I'm NOT being rasist, I am specifically referring to white Caucasian.) Are just awful looking.

Continental kids are so much more elegant, well spoken and well behaved. It's a little depressing to watch a British kid, sitting down to a Breakfast of Frosted Cereal, a glass of coke in one hand and an iPad in the other, ignoring his parents and stuffing his face. Compared to say a French family (yes I'm generalizing here) who always seem so much more elegant, well behaved and respectful.

I'm going to get slated I just know it

My Swedish family think British children are very well behaved and socially confident but over-protected and really funny about food.

I have Indian in laws. They're amazed that I put my kids to bed around 8pm and they sleep around 11 hours. In India they tell me kids sleep at the same time/amount as adults. They think I should hit the children when they're naughty.

waytooearly

Where in the States do you live? I have lived there on and off over the years through work placements and I have family there. I have never ever known any US kids to be afraid of speaking to strangers or have any problems speaking to adults.

I’ve lived in Spain and have both Spanish and South American friends. They have all commented on British kids being rude and badly behaved. I lived in a quiet area but not far from a resort which had many German, French, Dutch and Italian visitors as well as British. I think it’s telling that just sitting having a coffee and watching the work go by, my friends could tell nationality’s as they walked by. They were nearly always right

World not work

Confusedfornow I agree.
That said I went on holiday to turkey and there were lots of Russian families there Christ their kids are hard as bloody nails! They were often getting slapped round the head by dads especially the boys but then they were fed from a spoon like baby (7 or 8 year olds) by their mums. The fighting between siblings was vicious but was totally ignored by the parents.
My family is Italian and I love a lot of the ways they bring up children (except the obsession with getting them to eat when they're not hungry) so have tried to incorporate as much as I can.
We have a no screen at the table rule and on holidays we try and get them to try as much local food as possible ( not always easy)

I find it interesting how much of how kids behave is influenced by culture and how much is part of them. I always find it amusing when someone says on here that kids of a certain age can not do something when it is routine for kids of that age in another country to do that thing.
The one that really amazed me was the comment that said no kid likes curries.