Feeling sorry for myself - newly single mum. Tell me I can do this?!?

[Cantfindmenow]

Me and my partner split a few weeks ago - sort of mutual but my decision in the end. He stayed here for a few weeks as he wanted to be around d for DS first birthday etc. I was happy with this arrangement.

Today was finally the big day and he has moved out! He's staying with his parents for a few weeks until he finds a place of his own.

I was so looking forward to him going, but since he left this afternoon I have not stopped crying! I want to ask him to come home but I know that won't be best for either of us in the long run.

I'm just so stressed at the thought of being a single mum. I'll have ds (he's 1) from Sunday night through to Saturday morning (ex will have him Friday nights too when he has his own place but can't right now).

How am I going to do this by myself? I've not been overnight in a house by myself since I was a teenager! I've never locked our front door at night and I'm terrified of forgetting and just leaving it unlocked all night. I don't even know which bin goes out each week, how am I almost 30 and don't even know how to do these things??

I know these are stupid things to worry about but I'm mainly just worried that I can't be a good enough Mum by myself.

Please tell me I am being stupid and of course I can do these things?

You can do this! If I can anyone can!

Make yourself a list of things to do before bed like check the door, enjoy the fact that things can be your way, even if you don’t know what your way is yet you will figure it out.

You’ve got this!

You just get on with it, like you did when you took your newborn home. Only 17 more years then you are free and you will have enjoyed it, yet be glad to have moved on.

Stupid's a bit harsh...daft maybe but I know the feeling. Of course you can do it; it'll get easier with each day, I promise! And in your DS's eyes, you're the perfect mum for him. He doesn't care if you miss bin day, or tea isn't a huge affair, he'll just be happy you're there.

For today, let yourself cry, if that's what you need to do. You're allowed to feel a bit sorry for yourself.

Stick a reminder with alert in your phone about the door & check the council website for bin days, for the moment, until you adjust to your new normal & it all becomes second nature

You'll be grand! Start by enjoying doing the things you couldn't do when he was there. And take it easy on yourself. Don't feel like you have to be perfect, good enough is good enough.

And definitely relax when you have time off! The times without your DC will be very strange at first so have something planned.

This will all be ok.

Oh, and I've been on my own for three years and STILL put the wrong bin out even when everybody else has put the right bin out.

You can do it.
I had Dd1 young. I moved out my parents house when I was 18, dd1 was 3.
I didn't know what I was doing I can remember dd was so excited to have her own room and I was telling her to come in with me😂.
I was a single parent for 13yrs. I learned so much being on my own it really was the making of me.

Thank you every one.

I know I am being silly, I know so many people do this on their own so I can too!

I just can't shake the feeling that I need to text him and ask him to come home!

You say it's the right decision to split up, I took you at your word. Are you sure that's what you want?

Yeah I think so, I'm questioning it now so I'm not sure.

We were together 9 years, I probably haven't been happy together for close to 2. Pregnancy and babies really change you as a person and I didn't think we were well suited any more. We both changed. Tried relate but I hated it.

Oh I just don't know anymore, but he has said he wouldn't take me back even if I wanted him to.