How do I leave my job?

[flamed12]

I am at my wits end with coping with a 2 year old and 6 year old and working. I started 6 months ago full time (45 hours). I didn’t need to work but wanted to as I was worried about my future potential earnings after taking 2 years out.

I got offered a full time role (this one) and a very part time one. I took the full time one as the job was in a similar industry as I was in previously.

But in reality it’s shite. The people are awful and the job is painfully boring. There’s not enough work so I spend most of my day bored counting down the hours. This is time I want to be spending with my kids.

In January I asked to drop a day and they very very reluctantly agreed. I’m not sure why they were so against it as there’s still not enough work to keep me busy!!

Also it’s a small team and one person acts like the team leader as he’s more experienced. Everyone comes to him to do jobs/for help. Even though I might end up doing the job they will come to him then he will come to me. Then when This person is training me and another team member he won’t look at me at all. He will talk to the other person as if I’m invisible.

I literally dread every day and from Monday to Thursday I’m just existing. My two year old is exhausted after nursery and often falls asleep on the way home so I get to see her for 20 mins in the morning before I leave at 7:30am.

And honestly I’m just done in. I feel like I could cry at any minute.

How do I leave though. My boss goes on holiday next week for 2 weeks so he’s not going to be around. I have a 4 week notice period too. And then there’s the fact that everyone will be angry I’ve messed them about in their eyes. Taken on this role then leaving within 7 months. I can’t face the whole leaving palava either. I don’t want a fake speech or anything. No one speaks to me, no one knows me, they don’t approach me for anything. It’s the strangest place. I just wish I could disappear tomorrow from it all.

I walk over to my more experienced co worker and stand next to him waiting for him to stop typing before I ask a question. Last time I interrupted him he shouted go away! And I was in tears in the toilet so I waited.

And waited. He knows clearly I’m there. When he stops typing I say his name and he pretends to get a fright and rolls his eyes. I just ignore his dramatic performance and ask the question. He’s an idiot.

I spoke to my OH about going off sick and he said to work my notice and do it professionally. He thinks I might never know when I might need a good reference and it’s in my best interests to do it right. I know he’s right but honestly I’m so tempted to leave today and never return.

OP - are you still there?!! I see your husbands point about staying professional and getting a reference, but from what you're saying, they aren't capable of a meaningful, honest and professional reference so don't hang out for one. If resigning is just too difficult for you. Call in sick, take your full statutory days then see a GP - get a sick note and resign at the same time. Most companies don't give broad references now anyway (we are too litigious now) - they simply confirm or not your tenure and salary. Good luck! We're all expecting a note from your 'sick bed' tomorrow telling us that all is well!

Just hand your notice in, and speak to your boss when you see them. You’ll probably have to give notice to the nursery too.
I’ve handed my notice in without another job lined up. It was exciting. They’ll probably owe you some holiday, so you may be able to finish earlier than 4 weeks.

Just hand in your notice and I think you will find the weight will begin to lift! Life is too short - be happy 😊

Good luck

Hand your notice in!

If boss not about, serve notice to their boss, or HR.

Fuck them! It's just a job. You will be so relieved to get out there, once you're gone you won't give it a second thought. You will laugh about it one day!

He’s not right

By law they only need to give dates and sickness late records

They no longer provide a personal reference

Just walk

Thanks. I can’t believe how much support I have got from everyone. Genuinely believed everyone would say to suck it up and be professional.

I took all my personal belongings from my desk today. I’ll phone in sick tomorrow then Hand in my sick note. Then Monday I’ll hand in my notice. I’m scared but relieved I’m not going back. It’s final In my head and feel like the tunnel is almost over.

Not sure why I didn’t do it sooner. There’s been times where I’ve cried from the moment I leave the office or the moment I go home. I can’t wait to spend the full day with my two year old tomorrow. Proper bonding time too whilst the oldest is at school.

Thank you so so much everyone. Without your encouragement I would be sitting depressed possibly crying about the prospect of another day tomorrow. Thank you.

That's brilliant OP, you're doing the right thing. You'll feel so relieved once you're free of the place.

GOOD decision. Dont make yrslf miserable for a job. You will in time get another job and it can only be better.

Well done! You won't regret a second of this. Enjoy your day tomorrow and good luck next week.

Stop worrying about what other people at work think. It's your life. Do what you need/want to do and just leave. Or go off with stress for a while and then don't go back. But of the two options, the honourable one is to be honest with both them and yourself and just give your notice in.

How did you get on today?

I called in sick and left a message with someone and they said they’d be email my manager so I didn’t even have any awkward conversation.

I’ll go to doctors tomorrow and hand in a sick line and I’m thinking I could email my notice on Monday.

I had such a lovely day with my daughter. We played,went for a walk, went to the park, visited my mum and done the school run. During her nap I built an ikea bookshelf for her room that had been sitting for months that neither of us had time to build. When she woke up she acted like it was Christmas morning and was so thankful for her surprise.

Feeling so positive and happy and I 100% would not have acted without the support on this thread. Thank you.

🎖💃

Well done!!

That's great OP, I'm so pleased you've made that decision! I'm dreading going back to work on Monday, I've only been there three months and wanted to stick it out for a year. I can't afford not to work but this thread has made me think, life IS too short to be miserable so I'm going to start looking for something else!

Well done you!

I got my sick note and the doctor wrote “stress at work” for the reason I’m off. Which isn’t true as the job is so boring it’s painful but it’s causing me stress in my personal life trying to cope with a full time job and kids etc. I’m worried if I send it they’ll laugh.

The job itself may not be stressful but working there certainly sounds like it is, so it's perfectly valid. They are unlikely to question it anyway, they'll just be dotting their eyes and stuff. Hope you are doing ok.

Dotting i's..,.

Well done! I had a similar problem about 18 months ago and posting on Mumsnet gave me the courage to hand my notice in on a miserable job. I didn't regret it for a second and since found another one which although not perfect was way better than the job I was in.

Life is way too short to be in a horrible job.