DD (9) has a friend whose mum hits her

[Meshpregnancy]

DD came home from school today and said her partner for class work told her today that her mum hits her with a belt when she is naughty.

I don’t know this girl or her family. In this circumstance would you tell the school? DD is very sad that her friend will find she told adults her secret.

Also if I should tell the school who do I tell? I will have to call from work. Do I tell the receptionist or ask to talk to the class teacher or head of safeguarding?

you bet i'd bloody tell the school. You need to ask to speak to the Safe guarding officer.

Definitely call the school, our school has a nominated child protection officer normally the Head teacher or deputy.

Tell the school as soon as you can.

Either social services or school. I would go to social services.

Tell school.
It might not be true but needs checking.

I don’t think I can go straight to social services, I don’t even know the girl’s last name.

Call the school and ask to speak to the safeguarding lead. Explain to DD that these things cannot be kept secret, because adults have a responsibility to look after children in their care (all safeguarding training emphasises you should never promise a child to keep a disclosure a secret, so it wouldn't have been a secret if her friend had mentioned it to an adult at school). You might also want to enquire what the children are told wrt secrets - I would imagine most safeguarding lessons would include something about not keeping secrets, as they enable abuse (e.g. abuser will dress abuse up as "our little secret"). Also don't hesitate to follow it up in a couple of weeks' time - we (secondary school) are encouraged to do so, so we can be satisfied our report has been acted upon, so no one will think it strange. Good luck, it's not an easy thing.

You can tell the school. I told my school I was being hit (I was 15 at the time) social services got involved and the cunt of a social worker decided I was lying because I was to bright and had nice things. We were returned to my parent but at least it put the fear in them and they stopped after that.

Call the school tomorrow and ask to speak to the designated safeguarding lead. There's probably more info on the school website if you are unsure of who it is and want to mentally prepare tonight

Thanks. Have found the name of the safeguarding lead. I will try and call them directly.

Social services. Remember folks there’s a difference between what’s school is for and what social services are for.
Yes, schools have safeguarding etc for issues arising with pupils BUT they don’t have a staffed telephone line for anyone wanting to report issues.
As a rough guide, school = education.

Um. OP has already said she doesn't know the child's last name, which will be the first thing social services will need to know, along with the address. So I think it is reasonable to start with school.

They have safeguarding leads who can ring social care directly with a child’s surname however. And may well have other pieces of the puzzle to add together.

Slightly patronising tone there. The disclosure happened at school in a conversation between two pupils who only know each other as class partners, it’s not unrelated to the school.

So shall I call social services and say “a girls who has a very common first name, whose second name I don’t know, told my daughter this...” Won’t they just call the school themselves if I do that?

Sorry my last post was directed at alienspaceship.

Yes report it to school. It's a waste of a phone call to ss to be honest if the only info you have is her first name.

School safeguarding will speak to the girl and make their own referral.

"School = education" is an incredibly simplistic view.

Alienspaceship

Actually it's entirely appropriate to contact the school in this situation. The school safeguarding lead will pass the information straight onto social services. The OP doesn't know the girls name to report it to social services anyway.

And schools are not simply for education. I work in a school, yes we are responsible for educating children but also for ensuring their wellbeing and safety (as far as we can). This sort of information is absolutely suitable to be passed onto the safeguarding lead. The safeguarding lead will have more of a chance of getting through to the right person in social services compared to the OP who may not get to speak to anyone immediately.

Ffs enough with this school is only for education balls already.

School has the training and knowledge to be able to report a safeguarding concern. They also know the pupil in question's details. The disclosure was made at school, so of course it's appropriate to report to school.

Incidentally if any further disclosures or repeats are made to your daughter, report each and every one of those too. Safeguarding officers report each and every time. I run a weekly club, and if something is disclosed to me week in week out, it's my job to report it, whether there's any new information or whether it's likely the child is lying or not. Our - and your job is simply to report it, each time.

I repeat, schools do not man a reporting hotline. What exactly do you think social services ARE there for? Report to them with her first name, school she attends etc they will do the rest.
Many of you seem to perceive social services as not fit for purpose - but it’s ok, the school will pick up their slack.

Enough of the inflammatory BS. Nobody is saying SS isn't fit for purpose.

Alien obviously has no idea how schools work. (Watch them come back now with ‘ well actually...’

Well why not report it to them? And I very carefully said ‘seem to perceive’.

For the reasons already highlighted. Stop being a wazzock alien. It's called social care, BTW.

olderthanyouthink that’s appalling!