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Child soiling himself at school

13 replies

MRSCSB · 26/03/2019 12:54

My son who is 5 has started soiling himself at school , the school are concerned it is a physical thing as he does it and doesn't tell them or realise he's done it, however he has NEVER soiled himself at home, when at home he will stop and say I need to go to the toilet and then go so I do not believe there is a physical aspect to it if it's only happening at school, I've taken him to the GP who have said it's common at this age, which isn't very helpful. I personally think it's an anxiety thing , starting year 1 has been a huge change for him , I have spoken with the school who have said he's a happy child and not being bullied , they have also said he can go whenever he needs and doesn't need to ask , they suggested making him go in the morning before school however he doesn't always need to go in the morning. We have a few good weeks and then it happens again . He is also still wet at night . Has anyone else experienced this or could give some helpful advice on it?

OP posts:
Smoggle · 26/03/2019 13:03

Has something frightened him about the toilets there? School toilets can be dirty, no toilet paper, broken locks, bigger boys etc that puts lots of children off going.
I would try to get him into a routine of going before and after school to avoid the issue though.

whiteroseredrose · 26/03/2019 13:08

Sometimes it's because they're doing something interesting and don't want to stop.

endofthelinefinally · 26/03/2019 13:10

Are his bowels functioning normally at home? Normal, regular stools?

Didyousaysomethingdarling · 26/03/2019 13:21

This happened the day my DS started school. He's an end of August baby, so wasn't really ready for school. Initially I thought he had an upset tummy but it turned out to be encopresis, which led to overflow diarrhoea. I think it was anxiety related, he didn't want to use the school toilets.

Chubbychic · 26/03/2019 13:30

Do they have loud hand dryers that scare him? My ds won't use the school loos as the noise scares him, and when my older ds was little there were stories of a ghost in the loo so he wouldn't use them either!

MRSCSB · 26/03/2019 13:38

Yes he does use the toilet at home fine, it's only at school . He did say he didn't like the toilets because they were dirty and dark , we spoke with the teachers who suggested a buddy system but he is soiling himself without telling them , he doesn't actually tell them until other kids start smelling it and the teacher asks him, he's the complete opposite at home , never any poo accidents

OP posts:
MRSCSB · 26/03/2019 13:41

I've tried to get him to go in the morning but he doesn't always need to go and is forcing himself

OP posts:
CottonSock · 26/03/2019 13:43

Could it be leakage? Take a look at the Eric website. My 5 yo dd has this and it is a long term problem unfortunately. If it's a full bowel movement it's more likely he's just not getting there on time.

FelixTitling · 26/03/2019 13:48

He did say he didn't like the toilets because they were dirty and dark

He's told you why. School needs to step up and make this a safe experience for him. Budding up with another 5 Yr old isn't the answer.

Weepingwillows12 · 26/03/2019 13:49

I don't have an answer but just wanted to say I have similar issues with my 5 year old. In reception he wet himself a lot but teachers say he's happy and popular and has settled well. It stopped for a while and then he had a phase of pooing himself. Not full on just big stains. Few times a week for a while. I think it's an anxious response but not sure what to. I do think he doesn't want to miss anything too. I gave been focusing on hygiene (wiping techniques) etc but haven't gone to a gp or anything. It's not happened for a while but will be watching your thread to see what advice you get. Hope things work out for you and him.

CottonSock · 26/03/2019 13:51

Google Encopresis and see if it fits. My dd is not obviously constipated with it.

Luella29 · 26/03/2019 13:58

My son did this in reception. He's year 6 now and we've found out in the last few years that he has issues around communication and a speech and language disorder. In hindsight I think this was his way of expressing anxiety as he struggled to understand what was being said to him. It's not a common problem but I wish I had considered the possibility that he was struggling back then. Its unlikely to be the cause but do bear it in mind.

NewFoneWhoDis · 26/03/2019 14:39

my ds won't poo in school or at afterschool. He likes his own loo at home. So if he doesn't do one in the morning before school I make him try as soon as we get home.

Some people just like to use a familiar loo.

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