Over protective parents

[Spanielmadness]

Today I was in a small park just chilling out by an ornamental pond - the sort of thing where people sail small remote control boats on, with a few ducks bobbing about.

There was no flow of water in or out of the pond and no vegetation to hinder the view of the area from any angle. The surface around the pond was very smooth tarmac and the water itself was very shallow.

I noticed that almost all the parents were talking intensely to their children about how very dangerous the water was and how they could fall in. They were holding the children’s hands extremely tightly, often resulting in a massive tantrum/argument and the parents shouting about the danger the children were in near the water. A couple of the children were around 5 or 6 years old.

I asked my own father, was this typical for when I was young (I’m mid 30’s) and he said no, they would keep a close eye on us as small children and be ready to make a grab if needed, but we were allowed to enjoy walking near the water and talking about the ducks etc without being permanently physically restricted.

I just think, no wonder there is such obesity and kids want to sit indoors on devices if they are not allowed to explore and are constantly harangued about the danger they are in while closely supervised near a small pond.

I'm so confused as to how parents keeping their kids safe is the cause of childhood obesity

That does seem intense to me. Water terrifies me so I can somewhat understand parents reacting like that (except not really with the pond that you described) but I don't let my fear stop my children playing by the water (we live a short walk from a lake so we go there almost daily in the summer) as I'm supervising so I can pull them out if they fall in.

I agree . How can kids learn to assess risk if they are constantly monitored?

Go back to when I was a child in the 60s/70s and we would have been over the park without our parents. We travelled by bus and train on our own or with our friends from.a very young age and were able to buy tickets, buy stuff in shops and then walk miles home. We climbed trees, built dens, rode bikes without helmets and came home just before it got dark.

Nowadays the world is so different with more cars/traffic, risk of bullying from other children, pedophiles lurking on every corner and behind every bush and its no wonder many parents today wrap their children in cotton wool.

Drowning is a serious risk in children. Perhaps these kids were reckless. My youngest has no respect for something like a pond until he's up to his neck in it. Don't judge other people's parenting. Do you have kids?

I was abroad a few years and watched with amusement while a mother hovvered over her dc ages about 7 who were wearing rash vests and floating devices while they nervously dipped their toes in the baby pool. Meanwhile loads of other kids of the same age were flinging themselves in the deep end of the main pool and having a whale of a time.

It only takes a tiny amount of water for someone to drown.

I don’t think parents warning their children and encouraging them to be sensible around water is a bad thing. Holding hands of young children near water certainly isn’t.

That sounds absolutely extraordinary. In all my years of taking kids out to various parks - almost all of which have water/ponds - I don't think I've ever encountered such dramatics. Almost all parents I know would keep hold of toddlers, issue a general warning to older kids not to get too close to the water and that would be it. No intense conversations or shouting. So no, this isn't typical even now.

I collect my kids from a class every week, these kids are the older class, 8 years plus, it's not on a road just about 8 feet up a path, every single adult gets out the car and waits at the door for their kid!! It flummoxes me.

My son would always be held onto near water because he would wander or fall in and has no understanding of why he shouldn't. He is much older than 6.

Hairynick, could just be habit and convention rather than over protectiveness. You go through years of primary school where you have to collect from the door and then you see all these parents going to the door of this activity and probably just assume you have to do the same.

I'm so confused as to how parents keeping their kids safe is the cause of childhood obesity

Those parents keep them inside the house and not allowed out to play, they aren’t allowed out on their bikes or walk to school. Then other parents won’t let there child do those same things as they are frightened of their peers saying they are neglecting their children.

I had freedom to play out, ride my bike and walk to school. My dds played out and walked to school but we’re more restricted in doing so and I know other parents muttered about it

Children can drown in an inch of water and we are now aware of secondary drowning which was less well known than 30 years ago. Water is a massive risk and the parents are teaching their children this.

I agree that seems a bit over the top. If you are watching your kids and are within arms reach that should be enough to mitigate any risk. Parents have become very ott and it does impact on how kids play but often there are good reasons for concern.

A neighbour of mine growing up almost drowned in their tiny pond in their garden when he was around six. It's a genuine risk to children, think of all the stories of kids drowning in the bath.
If you breathe in water you can 'dry drown'. I think you're being judgemental tbh.

Drowning is really high up on the list of unintentional deaths worldwide. It is quiet. It can be subtle.