Child hit someone - how to handle it

[mortifiedmum12]

My 8yo has hit someone at school. It sounds like it was unprovoked but I'm still gathering the details.

I need to make sure he realises how unacceptable this is & dole out a suitable punishment.

I'm going to talk to him about it and try to find out why, I'm planning on cancelling all weekend activities and a very early night tonight. I'm also going to make sure he apologises to the person he hit.

Is this proportionate/over the top/not enough?

I've never had to deal with this before and am very cross but also can't understand where this behaviour has come from.

Has the school dealt with it?
What have they suggested?

I would suggest finding out why before handing out harsh penalties...

I'm meeting with the school this afternoon.

I have an 8 year old dd. How I work punishments is if she's in trouble at school and has been punished there, then we talk about it but there is no punishment at home because what's the point in punishing twice, you never get the full story from kids anyway and you can't enforce a punishment hours after the event.

If he has hit someone for no reason then j would just talk about how we don't hit people as we can hurt someone and it's not kind

I'm going to find out what the school think/have done today. I'm also going to listen to his side of things. But if he did lash out for no reason, I'm thinking some punishment of some kind would be appropriate.

I think you need to find out everything first. Does he normally lash out for no reason?

I'd listen to him. 8 year olds rarely hit fir no reason other than siblings. I would not cancel anything. Wait, listen, consider before you react all guns blazing with punishment.

Talking and listening is really important. Not least because your child will learn this from you.
Get all the facts.

The school are punishing him too so i wouldnt go over the top.
Id be having a big chat and reiterating the no hitting ever and leaving it if its out of character tbh

I’d have a chat about it but I wouldn’t punish at home as well. Yes he needs to know it’s not acceptable to hit but two punishments is over the top.

The school will take action.

No need for you to punish your ds twice.

Also it's highly unlikely to have been random and unprovoked. If this is a new thing to happen, why would you ds suddenly do it? The chances are it was provoked. Doesn't excuse it, but makes it a little more understandable.

Thanks all. We did talk to school and it sounds like the incident wasn't quite as cut and dry, or as aggressive it first seemed.

School didn't think punishment was necessary and have resolved the issue between the pupils, so we're going to leave it as is. There will be repercussions, but not ones that come from us.