Crippling indecision over having another child

[drivingmyselfinsane]

I'm driving myself insane going back and forth on whether we should have another child

One minute I think yes it would be great then the next I think of all the negatives and risks

I should add I am quite old and it may not happen even if we go for it and our other dc is older so age gap will be significant

But my constant indecision is driving me mad. I think I've overthought this issue for so long that I can't think straight

Anyone else felt like this? Not looking for answers .. I know only I can answer that but just comfort in others feeling the same way

I think deep down I don't want to and that's why I haven't but it's hard to make the firm decision to say no and close down that route forever

Feel absolutely the same except we have toddler twins (2.5) with ASD and I therefore have a higher chance of having twins again. Part of me really wants another baby even though I know it’s probably not the best idea.

I'd say, if you have to think about it then it's a no.

Good approach to many of the key things in life... if it's right it's a yes without hesitation

Having said that I can never make a decision about anything !

Be careful what you wish for! Nappies, sleepless nights, screaming, cbbees, boredom, expense, and (if you really are older) the increased risk of a baby with disabilities!

I agree; if you’re back and forth then the answer is no.

Yes. Same boat. Dithered for months, fell pregnant, miscarriage. It did help to clarify the issue for me, I would like one more. But probably too old. I'd say go for it.

I think there is a 'flip your thinking' approach - what are the negatives and positives of the other choice? Not having another one?

Sorry to hear of your m/c funthief. Yes I think it's a no but I feel really sad about it .. perhaps that's normal

I just feel like my family is not complete so I will be having another in the next year or 2 (although maybe sooner). I'm not looking forward to the pregnancy and early days though.

We always said we would have 2 then DH will get the snip but deep down I feel like we should be a family of 5 so will need to rethink our original plans.

I eventually realised that the niggle wouldn't go away until we had another.

I'm not convinced it would help in your circumstances, but I made a decision to only think about it every 6 months. So I'd think 'not now' and know that I could reconsider in 6 months. It meant it didn't drive me nuts.

I knew the day dd was born I was one and done
9 years later I haven't wavered, no matter how many times people ask, insinuate, insult and makes comments that I should.

I don’t think a niggle is enough of a reason to have a child. Sorry to sound mean but people need to have children for the right reasons. Makes me think how we say men think with the wrong head.