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Should I go to the party?

12 replies

cadburymilkchoc · 16/03/2019 15:19

Tonight is my oldest friends surprise engagement party. Known about it for a month. I was dating someone for 2 months but I ended it last Sunday because he kept speaking and meeting up with the girl he was dating before me claiming he was "in love" with her. Anyway obviously he isn't my plus one for tonight any more. So I asked my sister. She said she would come along with me until I just heard her on the phone to my DM saying she's had an argument with her finance and said she didn't feel great and didn't know if she was coming with me any more. She hasn't told me this herself though and I know her and she's in a big mood so that will be why she doesn't feel like coming and not any illness. My other close friend is pregnant with 3 other children. My other close friend has no one to baby sit her daughter and then I have no one else to ask.
I'm petrified about going on my own. I know my friends family but wouldn't say I'm close to them and would just be making small talk. Her other friends I know of but not well and they all have partners who they are bringing. The other guests I don't know at all. I don't want her thinking I'm being funny though by not going. I found out last week she didn't ask me to be bridesmaid which hurt but her decision and I haven't said anything but don't want her thinking that's part of the reason I wouldn't go.
So what would you do?

OP posts:
Slowcookervegan · 16/03/2019 15:23

Go, you might actually end up having a great time. Set yourself an hour and if you feel awkward leave at least you are showing her support on her night.

cadburymilkchoc · 16/03/2019 15:33

Yea maybe. It's just that initial turning up on your own that scares me the most. And that I'll look like such a loner. Had a rubbish week and feeling Down. Just trying to psych myself up to go.

OP posts:
LondonUK · 16/03/2019 15:41

I used to socialise (even travel the world) on my own by going to up to 3 places a night: a show, a bar, briefly a club and used to be home by 1am the latest....... what is wrong with that?

Go, have fun, if you do not like it, go home early. You only live once. Life is for learning.

HollowTalk · 16/03/2019 15:44

It's very different if every other person is part of a couple, though, LondonUK.

HoraceCope · 16/03/2019 15:47

are you normally shy?

shinyNewPound · 16/03/2019 15:49

Go. It's for your oldest friend. Say congratulations, gush over the ring, people watch whilst enjoying a nice glass of something. You can then easily slip out early if you wish, having done your duty to your friend.

cadburymilkchoc · 16/03/2019 15:52

Well people wouldn't think I was shy as most of the time I put on an act. I like small groups and one to ones not being in a large group/party situation. This week I've felt quite low after what happened with the guy and my anxiety is pretty high so I am already feeling on edge about going. I don't want to let her down though but I'm scared about going too.

OP posts:
FriarTuck · 16/03/2019 15:55

Turn up, stay a short while to show your face, then tell friend you have a really bad headache and are heading off 'but I didn't want to miss this' or some such bollocks. Job done.

FriarTuck · 16/03/2019 15:56

Though personally I admit you wouldn't get me at a party!!!

Slowcookervegan · 16/03/2019 15:56

You cant hide for the rest of your life and the sooner you socialise the better it isfor you. I know its hard but you need to do this

cadburymilkchoc · 16/03/2019 15:58

slow I wouldn't have a problem socialising. It's just the fact most people are in couples. It's only my friend in really close to and don't know others hardly at all. And I don't have a plus one either. Standing on your own in a room of people who know each other or has a plus one by their side is quite daunting

OP posts:
cadburymilkchoc · 16/03/2019 16:29

So just received a text she def isn't going.

OP posts:
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