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Original poster

Child maintenance

12 replies

adultcat · 14/03/2019 08:51

Good morning, I'm posting here for traffic...
My exh is due to start paying child maintenance for our 13 yo DD but is trying to get out of it!
I've told him if he thinks I'm trying to 'fleece' him he can go through CSA (or whatever they're called these days) but he said if he does he'll simply tell them what he has spare each month and they'll take that (less than half of what it should be) and write the rest off because he has debts etc.
Does anyone have experience with this? I'm really not trying to take him for everything, I would just like some financial help for bringing up our daughter.
He's in a relationship with two good full time wages coming in and no dependants there. I don't doubt he has debts / expenses but so do I...

Thanks for reading!

OP posts:
goldengummybear · 14/03/2019 08:55

His Partner's wages don't come into it.

Do you know what he earns? It might be easier if you make a claim first and he has to prove to CMS that he doesn't earn that amount.

BitchQueen90 · 14/03/2019 08:57

CMS won't take his debts into consideration. It's based on his wage and whether he has other dependent children living with him.

Do you know how much he earns? If so use the CMS calculator to work out what he should be paying. He can check that himself as well.

AwkwardPaws27 · 14/03/2019 08:57

www.gov.uk/calculate-your-child-maintenance

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Lonecatwithkitten · 14/03/2019 08:59

The CMS will look at his income and calculate a percentage of that. They are not interested in debts, they will only make adjustments for the number of overnights and there is some adjustment if he has to do a large amount of travelling to get your DC.
You can use the calculator on their website if you know what his income is to give you an idea if he is paying correctly.

BitchQueen90 · 14/03/2019 08:59

Although CMS are pretty crap from what I've heard. If you can it's definitely best to come to a private arrangement. I have one with my ex although luckily he is a reasonable man and not many are when it comes to maintenance.

ems137 · 14/03/2019 09:32

It won't make a difference whether he has debts etc. If he isn't going to be reliable I would just go through the CMS. It will save you the stress and having to argue with him every month.

Original poster
adultcat · 14/03/2019 09:59

Thanks everyone.
I've worked it out on the calculator on his wages when we split, I know he's had a pay rise since then though. I think he thinks he's actually paying ME - as in, so I can spend it on myself!

OP posts:
Tutlefru · 14/03/2019 10:02

He knows nothing about the CMS then!

His debts won’t be taken in to account at all. It will go off his wage and that alone. If there is shared care then they reduce it but it still won’t factor in his debts.

Going through the CMS was the best thing I’ve done. They slapped a DOE on him.

Bishalisha · 14/03/2019 10:04

They take his gross income into account and calculate off that based on overnight stays and other dependant children.

If there’s 1 child and no overnights it would be 12% of his gross income.

He has to prove his income to CMS via payslips- if he doesn’t they go directly to HMRC to seek the information.

It’s a very long drawn out process so your best bet is to get the CMS involved right away, as they’ll have to give him a chance to pay the legal minimum directly, then if he cocks up they’ll issue a DOE order on his wages. I got in touch with the CMS April last year and am still waiting for the correct amount of maintenance to come in (it should start from next month as they finally have the DOE after I got my MP involved)

Good luck

Original poster
adultcat · 14/03/2019 10:46

Thank you all.
It's due to start in 10 weeks so I've told him I'll contact csa.
She stays at his one night one week and two nights the second week which I don't mind being taken in to account.

OP posts:
HotChocolateLover · 14/03/2019 13:08

Ooh my blood is boiling, he sounds like my ex!! He doesn’t get to dictate what you get as maintenance and tough shit if he has debts. They MAY do a variation of his income if they can prove that he is paying joint debts but you would lose a minimal amount IF they allowed this. Don’t miss out on what you’re entitled to.

SMW3103 · 14/03/2019 15:11

I've been divorced 8 years and I've never received a penny maintenance from my ExH for our two DC (now aged 10 & 9). He's rarely worked over the years (a factor in my leaving him), and when he does its cash in hand so CMS has never been an option for me. I don't even bother asking him now as it's an argument for nothing/have just got to a stage where I'd rather go without than ask Hmm

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