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Original poster

Can you get away with being lazy if you are beautiful? 😁

35 replies

user1483390742 · 12/03/2019 18:14

My friend has married a stunning woman. She is tall, slim, very stylish and very pretty. She also works full time and is studying for her phD.
However, she does absolutely nothing around the house to help her DH. Whenever we go around, she sits reading her paper or phone looking beautiful whilst he flaps around cooking, cleaning, washing up etc. He also works full time and long hours.
I think she is very lazy- she has never even made me a cup of tea- but everyone else fawns over her and how clever/stylish she is!
How does she do it? Has she got the life I want? Am I a green eyed monster? I would never get away with doing nothing at home- am I just not gorgeous enough? Confused

OP posts:
MarvinMarvinson · 12/03/2019 18:17

Do you really think she does nothing at home based on what happens when you go over? You are his friends so why should she be making you dinner and cups of tea?

Someone who is working full time and studying couldn't really be described as lazy surely?

ScreamingValenta · 12/03/2019 18:19

You don't know what goes on in the house while you're not there!

If she's working full-time and studying for a PhD I wouldn't call her 'lazy'.

If you and your partner have a good balance of responsibility in the house, you should be thankful for that - if your partner isn't pulling their weight, address that rather than wasting mental energy envying your friend.

Hiddenaspie1973 · 12/03/2019 18:19

Yep. She should milk it or stash some funds so she isn't buggered when her looks fade and she's been ravaged by the menopause.

User10fuckingmillion · 12/03/2019 18:19

She works full time and is studying for a phd...

Mookatron · 12/03/2019 18:20

If she works full time and is doing a PhD she's not lazy. You wouldn't suggest it if she were a man.

I reckon she doesn't like you and tells her H you can come over but he's doing all the entertaining.

kaytee87 · 12/03/2019 18:21

Well you're the DH friend so it's only right he should do the running around after you.

If the sexes were reversed you wouldn't bat an eyelid.

Oblomov19 · 12/03/2019 18:25

I wouldn't clean, iron, etc if I earnt a packet!!

excitedtobehere · 12/03/2019 18:27

Judge Judy has a book called 'beauty fades, dumb is forever'. If this woman annoys you so much, you should find other friends.

AnneLovesGilbert · 12/03/2019 18:28

If she’s reading the paper or on her phone when you’re over there she probably doesn’t like you much, which would explain her lack of hosting.

Al2O3 · 12/03/2019 18:28

She sounds pretty cool to me. What’s her PhD - now that’s the interesting bit.

Guylian2019 · 12/03/2019 18:29

Have you ever seen the size of a PhD thesis? I doubt any lazy person could do it.

thedevilinablackdress · 12/03/2019 18:31

I know you didn't post this in AIBU but YABU based on the info given.

  • Works f/t plus PhD? Not lazy
  • Your friend makes you tea etc etc when you go round, seems normal
  • Their domestic arrangements not your business.
  • Yes, you sound jealous.
Springwalk · 12/03/2019 18:33

You are her dps friends they probably have an understanding that he does the grunt work when you are over. Dh and I had a similar arrangement with his family, as I found their company exhausting

BettyBooJustDoinTheDoo · 12/03/2019 18:37

My friends and family always thought that about me when they came over for dinner that I did bugger all as my DH is the one who cooks, what they did not see before they arrived is I was the one who cleaned the house top to bottom, laid and decorated the table and did lots of the preparation of food beforehand but as he did the ‘Glory’ stuff of the actual cooking I was constantly told how lucky I was that DH cooked and I did not have to do anything, they really did think that I sat around filing my nails all day Hmm

Supergrassyknoll · 12/03/2019 18:40

Sorry but you just sound jealous! He's your friend, why should she be running around for you when you visit! She sounds ace and not lazy at all, why don't you try to get to know her!?

CostanzaG · 12/03/2019 18:41

Lazy people don't work full time and do a PhD.
When I was in that situation I was bloody exhausted.

However, surely it's not her responsibility to look after you given you're her DH's friend..... regardless of her current work situation.

I wonder if this would have even registered if it was the other way round?

StrippingTheVelvet · 12/03/2019 18:48

Her husband clearly has more time to do the cooking and cleaning as he isn't doing a PhD....

I'm guessing she's doing it for a higher income and standard of living for the two of them rather than for the craic.

MaidenMotherCrone · 12/03/2019 18:55

To answer your opening question Op.

You don't need to be beautiful to get away with being lazy. I'm not beautiful and manage it perfectly well. (I actually work extremely hard but at home I suit myself)

The person in question isn't lazy though is she, you just feel inferior to her and are looking to make yourself feel better.

bordellosboheme · 12/03/2019 18:57

She's doing a PhD and working full time. That's almost impossible. Could you do it op?

gamerwidow · 12/03/2019 18:58

Why do you care who does the housework in their house. If her DH was sitting on his arse and she was running around doing dinner would you wonder if being a good looking man made it ok to be lazy.
If you want to do less work at home no one is stopping you.

teyem · 12/03/2019 19:02

Fuck me, that's some chip on your shoulder!

Seaseasea · 12/03/2019 19:04

Yes you’re jealous. Im jealous too, she sounds great.

Hoppinggreen · 12/03/2019 19:07

I’m bone idle but people think I’m incredibly busy and efficient for some reason so get away with it.
I’m also quite fat and a bit old

iwillkeepthishouseclean · 12/03/2019 19:10

I wished it do sent work for me !

Walkmehome · 12/03/2019 19:11

Maybe they’re both happy with that set up.