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I want to leave

3 replies

NotSoHappyMan · 08/03/2019 20:01

I want to leave my wife but I am terrified she will stop me seeing my children. We have both been unhappy for ages. Although we have tried to sort it out on numerous occasions and things are okay for a few days then back to blazing rows and arguments. We have 3 children and the only reason I have stayed is for their sake. To give them a sense of normality, I don't want them to see what happens between us. Anny advice on what I can do would be fantastic thanks. I know this is primarily a ladies website. So probably unusual seeing/ hearing a male on here asking for help. I just don't know where else to turn in this situation. She has cut me off from my friends and even banned me from going to my uncles funeral next week 12/03/2019 as she doesn't like my mum and she was concerned I may talk to her. ( They hate each other passionately lol) so yeah any advice would be fantastic thanks. Have a lovely evening people

OP posts:
thegreatbeyond · 08/03/2019 20:17

Well, that is abusive behaviour and it's not difficult to see why you want to end the marriage.
Do you intend to be the primary carer for your children?

Bringbackthestripes · 08/03/2019 20:54

It is abuse behaviour.
I am sorry you are in this difficult situation. My brother is in a similar predicament in that his wife has cut him (and his kids) off from seeing anyone Despite us being nearby & being the only people they get Birthday/Christmas presents from and we would love to take them for days out she just keeps them in the house other than at school, no longer lets our brother see us or our mum. Wouldn’t let him or his kids attend grandads 90th birthday...all a bit sad. Please seek formal advice. There is lots that is free.

I know you want to protect your kids- and that is admirable- but to protect them you may need to fight for them. Either for parental control or access, please start logging all the information you have for your wife exerting control, issuing any threats, arguing when she has said you can’t do certain things, if (and when) she has hurt you - so that it is all logged. Do it now, and each and every time, so it is fresh in your head.

www.citizensadvice.org.uk/family/gender-violence/domestic-violence-and-abuse/

www.mankind.org.uk/help-for-victims/types-of-domestic-abuse/

Please seek help from family and friends before you lose them all and seek help from professional resources so it is logged because it is very easy for a manipulative mother to make out a man is distant and not bothered.....seemingly. So I would advise you to get professional advice ASAP.

NotSoHappyMan · 09/03/2019 18:28

Thank you for all the advice people. Nice to know there is somewhere to turn for advice if it's needed. I'm logging things all the time now.

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