I've name changed for this as regular username will put me.
I moved to DH's hometown (and where he's lived his whole life), when we got married. We moved to the house a week after our wedding day. 3 months later, I gave birth to DC.
I don't really have any friends here, I've made the odd one out and about but none that have really stuck. Which is a shame as I'm very friendly and sociable. I live 5 minutes away from my SIL and I absolutely love her company. She works part time and looks after her brother's children when she isn't so I spend half the working week there!
However, if any minor arguments break out, or big ones, I know deep down she will choose BIL and his wife's side. DH has warned me of this and I know it now to be true. Something escalated badly recently (and was blown way out of proportion by BIL and his wife), and his wife announced she wouldn't be leaving her children there if my DC was there too. In a nutshell, my DC bit her DC of the same age. SIL never really made it clear that she wouldn't be banning me from the house, and didn't want to take sides. So naturally, I don't feel welcome. Although she's told DH she isn't banning me.
I'm about to start a new job that'll help towards by Midwifery application when I apply for Uni this year. I start my Access course in September, where I'll be working my usual job but also studying at college too. DC will come with me for college and stay in a crèche, whilst he will be with SIL for the days I'm working. And will also be with SIL when I start this job in a few weeks.
I feel so so lonely. I don't think it's just a friendship thing. Family connection is something I really crave and love. My family live 2 hours away by car and I don't see much of them now, which is a huge shock to the system. I would consider moving back, however, this town offers very good support and help for adults wishing to peruse education and go to uni. I've been told it's because it's deprived so has a lot of funding to help people.
The town is incredibly depressing, an awful place to live as a whole. But I live in the 'nice' area so I don't see that until I go into town or go elsewhere other than my own part of the place.
I'm currently learning to drive (a must have if you live here, there are beautiful surrounding areas). This would also give me the freedom to see my family more. I'm hoping to have the driving test down by September when I start College alongside work, otherwise it'll be a right pain.
I don't know if I'll ever be able to move nearer to my own family again. The prices are extortionate where they live. Ironically, we are both 25/30 minutes away from London. Just opposite ends.
What would you do? What's your advice to me? Will this feeling of needing family close for that particular relationship ever go away?
I'm wondering if College/Uni will help with these isolated feelings at all? I'm really looking forward to becoming a MW and I hope it opens new doors for me, in more ways than one.