So upset with son's behaviour

[cjt110]

Posted the other day about son here

He has been so unruly these last few days. Arguing back etc. We were called in at pick up and he had bitten another child.. I'm gutted.

I know it might seem extreme but I;m so upset about it.. This is not my boy and his behaviour...

what can I do? I've spoken to him, again, explaining how it's not acceptable. He says he gets cross, and "more more more" I've explained it's ok to be cross but we don't use our hands, mouths or feet to lash out. Told him to go and see the teacher if he feels cross.

This is really bringing me down and I feel so embarrassed.

My arm from when he bit me is a real shiner now a few days later and looks awful

bumping for advice

Just read your other thread.

Unfortunately, right now, this is your boy. DD was frightful at this age, I nearly lost an eye. It lasted about 3 months, and iirc it was to do with starting school. Basically, she had to interact with other people whom she didn't choose to be with. Firm cuddling during meltdowns, not letting her get behind us on the stairs, reassurance etc. Chin up, courage, hide the knives and matches.

I just want to cry.

I know it sounds melodramatic. He's such a beautiful boy and so loving.. and now this.

I have a huge bruise from where he bit me on my wrist and keep seeing it and it makes me sad.

Do we need to go and speak to school about it?

I think you need to really get a grip on your feelings about his behaviour. You need to understand why you're so badly affected by it. You also need to put aside your embarrassment. That shouldn't factor in.

Clearly the behaviour is less than ideal, but it's also within range of normal behaviour for a four year old. They do occasionally bite/answer back/lash out etc. It's not good. They need to be punished, to be told it's not acceptable and to be taught better ways of dealing with their emotions. But it's not indicative of some kind of psychopathy. He just a normal kid.

Chances are he's going to continue through his life doing all sorts of less than ideal things and embarrassing you. You need to get a grip. Deal with it, but not let it become.more.of an issue that it needs to.

I think a friendly chat with his teacher would be appropriate, see if there is anything happening at school that is upsetting him.

An early night. He sounds a bit tired and rundown.

I think you need to really get a grip on your feelings about his behaviour. I probably do. The teacher made ME feel like I'd done wrong when I called to talk to her. Like I had said to him it was OK to bite someone or some such nonesence.

I just want my boy back.

Every day with him feels like a battle. I am tired. Tired of battling for him to have a bath, get dressed or other such shit and now this, Cherry on the cake that was