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How should I handle this?

2 replies

Awittyusernamehere · 04/03/2019 11:49

There is someone who I used to be very close to. We were childhood friends and good mates throughout teenage years. Ultimately though, we’re completely different characters and therefore we drifted apart in our early twenties. We’ve had some fallings out in which neither of us were in the wrong but it did highlight that we’re very different people now and so we’re friends on FB, wish each other happy birthday, etc but no more than that.

I am aware that she and her husband have been struggling to conceive. I am pregnant so keeping in mind how close we used to be, I wanted to tell her privately rather than let her find out through a Facebook post or something. It felt more respectful to her feelings.

She has got back to me saying her only shot at IVF has failed. I don’t know what to say other than ‘I’m so sorry’ and that I’m here if she wants to talk. Is that a cop out? What else could I say?

OP posts:
ImMeantToBeWorking · 04/03/2019 12:03

To be honest it is a difficult one. A close friend is saving for IVF (it's expensive in Ireland) and we are TCC and I hate talking to her about it. But, its not your fault that you are pregnant and they are struggling. All you can do is say you are there for her if she needs to talk, and if you do meet up do not be rubbing it in her face about being pregnant. I don't think it is a cop out, as you said you are not close to her anymore so chances are she won't take you up on offer to talk, but at least you offered.

And congrats on your pregnancy. Flowers

Awittyusernamehere · 04/03/2019 12:17

Thank you. It must be heartbreaking for her. I’ll just let her know that she can talk to me and leave it at that.

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