Allowing transfer of a jealous bully to my team.....

[TwixBix1]

Hi all,
I feel full of regret now..
Long story short: started at a job and an awful female co-worker made me feel awful and hindered my learning at the job (she was supposed to teach me things as she'd been there longer than I had) at a software company - she did this very underhandedly.

Fortunately, I got a transfer and moved to a different department due to this and has been really good for me since I moved department, have learnt lots and really progressed and got promoted etc and get along with everyone.

However, recently this awful colleague was interested in a transfer to our team (this is just over a year since I was moved) and she went through the interviews etc and the majority of the interviewers (~80% said she did not perform well (they know her from working with her and went through a formal interview process with her). In the end, they jointly thought it's best to give her the lower position (they applied for two potential positions) so it would be below mine.

Anyway, I was asked opinions about the girl and I mentioned the back story of what had happened. Despite this, as I'm a really nice and perhaps too soft person, I reluctantly agreed to her transfer under the condition I don't have to work with her directly. I was given the option to say no completely and the transfer might not have happened at all apparently (esp due to low performance in interview anyway I presume) and was told it was admirable I hadn't gone for the full "no way" approach. I was glad to be complimented at the time but now I wonder if I did the right thing.. If it was the other way around, I'm sure she'd have had no issue saying no way to me joining..

I rarely feel regret with my decisions but here I already do......

What would you have done?

I expect you'll be stuck with her now as everyone else will feel well rid.

You shot yourself in the foot, really. Turning the other cheek is kind, but if you hadn't transferred away from her, would you still work for the company? You may find yourself looking for a new job.

Given the option to say no I would have said no. Why would you willingly subject yourself to a bully?

I think you've proved yourself the bigger person.

PLUS she's below you, not above you now. You fit in, you know the job. You know that no-one's that sure of how well she'll perform or hugely impressed with her so far. So it seems like it's a bit of a win-win for you, really.

You don't have to become her buddy.

If things have now moved on to the extent that she can not hurt you, then you can be proud of that.... Isn't the best revenge to live well.

I’d have said no, no way, not my team! Why wouldn’t you?

Well, it might not go well. But I think I'd have said the same in your position... it's not an easy thing to be asked.

I think most men would have said " No, this person could be destructive for the whole team, so from my past experience of her, I won't endorse her"....I think the interviewers are relieved you said Yes, as they have now passed this "issue' onto your shoulders and they have not had to give this person feedback on why she didn't get EITHER job due to her overall very poor performance.....

I was in this situation and did what you did. I regret it.

Seems like a mixed bag of responses with most swaying towards a no.. eek...

But you don’t have to work with her?

Do you like your team, do you really want to inflict her on them? I'd say No.

Your workplace sounds extremely unprofessional. Who are these people doing the interviewing then telling other members of staff about their opinions?

That said, I recently refused to have somebody back on my team who was on it two years ago and completely ruined the atmosphere with her whining victim mentality and undermining of me and the company as a whole. My boss emailed me and said she'd been interviewed and what was my opinion. I said it was up to them what they decided but no, I would not want her on my team again.

Can't you say on reflection you've changed your mind?