How to share out housework

[FrenchyQ]

We are a family of 4 (with 2 dogs and a guinea pig). I work 30 hours a week, my husband works generally 70+ hours a week. Daughter is 20 and is at college 3 days a week(mon, wed,fri) and usually spends weekends at her boyfriends house as she works part time near his. Son is 12.

I'm just trying to get my head around whether I'm being unreasonable to expect everyone to muck in and help out as at the moment I pretty much do it all, I cook most meals, clean up, etc.
Husband makes the occasional meal and makes the packed lunches, daughter occasionally empties the dishwasher.

How does it work in your household?

Your dh is working extremely long hours so I think it's fair that he doesn't do loads.

Your DD is a grown adult with plenty of time on her hands. I'd expect a fair bit from her.

Your ds should be keeping his own room clean and perhaps helping to load, unload the dishwasher and maybe set the table for dinner.

Dh works full time shift work and I work full time at home. Three dc aged 8-15.

Dh does food shop and bathroom and cooks when he’s here.

I do laundry and day to day tidying, hoovering, dusting and loading the dishwasher, mop floors, decluttering etc.

Dc empty the dishwasher each morning (they have a section each), tidy, hoover and dust their bedrooms plus a couple of extra jobs at the weekend like hoovering the stairs. They strip and remake their beds and put their clean laundry away.

I definitely think your dc especially should be doing more.

Forgot to add, I do everything but am a sahm and DC are both school age. My oh will occasionally empty dishwasher on the weekend and I get my DC to help out with the odd thing like clearing the table after dinner and tidying their rooms.

Thanks for the replies....Since DH had this job I've not expected him to do much around the house, which is fine (and he never complains about the house being a mess).
I think the real issue is that the kids really take me for granted....my daughter especially, she seems to think that because she goes to college 3 days a week and works the weekend that her Tuesday and Thursday are her days off so she can do nothing!

To be honest at 12 I would expect your DS to be doing a fair bit, maybe keeping his room clean (weekly hoovering and bed changing) plus dishwasher filling every night plus one job off a chores list every day after school. Your daughter should be doing a lot. Obviously keeping her room clean etc and certainly doing her own laundry, but I would expect her to hoover and tidy up the house on a regular basis and maybe do some of the supermarket shopping / run errands etc. Your DH shouldn't be expected to do much on those hours, maybe bins and sorting his own laundry/ ironing?

I think I would be acknowledging one of your dd's days home from college as study days. She will have assignment, research ext to do and you only get one chance usually to be this age and get the qualifications. I would be expecting her to maybe do stuff on the other day. Maybe hoover through and do an evening meal or Do bathroom/bathrooms and kitchen. Even with working at the weekend this still gives her plenty free/hang out ext time,