Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Does anyone with anxiety/depression find nice weather makes you worse, not better?

97 replies

saxatablesalt · 22/02/2019 10:25

Just that really. I suffer from anxiety and a bit of depression which I guess is mild to moderate. Everyone else I know with this seems to feel miles better when the days get later and the sun comes out but for me it's the opposite.

It's a lovely day outside today, I can see that, I work from home, I've dropped my toddler off at nursery and I could easily go for a walk. I'm curled up on my laptop underneath my duvet feeling paralysed by anxiety and sadness. Feel like I'm surrounded by people feeling happy that it's spring and thinking everyone else should be out and about enjoying it. In winter I have free rein to curl up indoors with tea and a book, and there is no pressure to be outdoors enjoying everything.

Anyone else? I feel like such a shit person as I feel I should just be appreciating my life, who knows how much longer I'll have left on this earth etc etc, but I just feel terrible and I don't know why.

This is just a rant really. I've had all the meds and all the therapy it's possible to have and I still feel like this. I'm only 30 and I've had anxiety literally since I can remember.

OP posts:
NottonightJosepheen · 22/02/2019 21:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheFirstOHN · 22/02/2019 21:58

As an introvert who is prone to anxiety, I completely agree with this.

If it's rainy and windy outside, it feels socially acceptable for me to curl up under my duvet with a book.

If it's sunny and warm, I feel cultural pressure to socialise more and be outdoors more.
Ironically, I'm expected to appear happy and relaxed doing these things, whereas actually what makes me happy and relaxed is hibernating indoors on my own.

Grapetree · 22/02/2019 22:06

I have depression and can completely relate. I hate the summer, it’s recently been sunny where I’m from and I’ve already got that sickening dread for what’s to come...

As others have said, I feel more exposed. Also, I have chronic skin conditions and I can’t hide away with long sleeved clothing in the summer. I feel so down seeing my reflection under harsh sunlight, I look dirty
Not to mention sweating flares my skin further

I can’t explain enough just how bright sunlight genuinely makes me feel sick and down
Meanwhile everyone else around me raves about it, so I usually don’t admit how much I hate it to others

certainlymerry · 22/02/2019 22:11

I read somewhere that often depression can be worse in summer or good weather because everyone else is perceived as having a wonderful time, having barbecues and going to the beach, and that highlights the feelings of loneliness and alienation for the depressed person.

Bubba1234 · 22/02/2019 22:12

Haha not at all JosepheenWink
I know I was laughing to myself writing that haha

NottonightJosepheen · 22/02/2019 22:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SuperPixie247 · 22/02/2019 22:21

This a thousand times over!

I actually love the warmth and the heat but its the social pressure to be out and about that gets to me. Can I not just enjoy it from my little haven backyard?!

Pebble21uk · 22/02/2019 22:46

Yes, but in a slightly different way. My anxiety skyrocketed last summer with the extreme heat. I find coping with heat really hard... I'm peri-menopausal and asthmatic and it triggers huge anxiety around my breathing. I also sweat buckets and feel constantly uncomfortable, claustrophobic and too hot to do anything active. I hate it! It resulted in panic attacks last year!

I'm already really dreading another summer like last year. My meds were upped and an air con unit was purchased last summer, but not sure what else I can do... I've tried CBT too.

Teddy1970 · 22/02/2019 23:05

I've found my people too! I've just never ever liked Summer, it makes me a bit panicky and all the bullshit that comes with it too, the pressure to be outside enjoying yourself, the hot nights where you can barely breathe because it's so stifling, the bugs, the weather men/women ASSUMING we all want "glorious" sunshine.. the neighbours rancid BBQ being lit after yonks in the shed. Today we had sunshine and I was glad it clouded over, I felt myself once again. I'm looking forward to Autumn already!

Moominfan · 22/02/2019 23:11

It's not the weather but It's not sharing the same happy feelings. I expect I should feel x but feel y instead which makes me feel even more y. I just give myself a pass, feel the feelings, don't ignore them. We're not meant to be happy all the time and that's ok

Teddy1970 · 22/02/2019 23:20

The noise levels in Summer irritate the hell out of me too, everything is just louder, neighbours chatting in their garden until really late with music blaring, shouting in the streets, cars revving, people are just generally out later when it's hot I suppose, this Winter where I live we haven't much snow and I love it because it acts like a blanket and everywhere is QUIET...I miss that.

Asta19 · 23/02/2019 08:39

A couple of years ago I went to Egypt and the temperature was around 32/33 each day so not much higher than the bloody heatwave we had last year. People there were not out “enjoying it” anyone that could seemed to sleep for most of the day and be up all night. I remember we arrived around 2am due to odd flight times, and in the car going to where we were staying we passed huge groups of people, including many children, sitting around drinking tea and talking! In this country there is too much of an expectation that we “rush out” to “enjoy” the sunshine as it’s supposedly so rare! Didn’t feel very rare last year! This does place huge pressure on those of us who struggle.

And yes to the noise! I got so sick of all my neighbours party’s that went on until 3 or 4am. There’s no consideration because hey it’s summer, we’re having fun! I’m just not ready for it to be spring already. We didn’t get a proper autumn because the heatwave dragged on and on and it’s only February now. I’d like a couple more months of “my weather” before facing all that again.

ScorpiaForCatra · 23/02/2019 08:56

There’s no consideration because hey it’s summer, we’re having fun!

I hate this attitude that people have. The whole world seems so much more self centered these days. People couldn't give a shit that they're disturbing neighbours or turning areas into shit holes covered in broken glass and bottles as long as their having fun. Summers of football are the worst. Not only do they then justify their scummy behaviour with, "but it's summer" you then get, "but England's playing"

EthelFechan · 23/02/2019 09:51

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

ScorpiaForCatra · 23/02/2019 09:59

EthelFechan

Listen to you lot just feeding off each others' misery!

You don't have to open the thread, post, read or exist tho tbf. Shut the browser and go for a walk, you'll not be missed.

EthelFechan · 23/02/2019 10:21

Scorpia - I'm off for a walk as soon as I've finished my coffee - why don't you do the same? Have a listen to this from the book Josepheen mentioned up thread.

ScorpiaForCatra · 23/02/2019 10:46

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Asta19 · 23/02/2019 10:52

Well hopefully Ethel will be out on her walk for a good long time and stay off this thread!

QuirkyQuark · 23/02/2019 10:58

@EthelFechan

Listen to you lot just feeding off each others' misery!

I'm not sure I've ever read something quite so insensitive or offensive on mn ever. Please do us all a favour and go away with your pearls of wisdom.

MumUnderTheMoon · 23/02/2019 11:20

Seasonal effective disorder occurs when the seasons affect your mood. Usually people improve in warmer weather but for some, like myself things are better in the autumn/ winter. For me I think that the summer is brighter, the neighbourhood is busier (kids out playing, people out playing music in their gardens etc) it's just all much more overwhelming.

EthelFechan · 23/02/2019 12:47

Fuck me, that'll do what 3 therapists haven't managed

Well, if 3 therapists have failed maybe you'd benefit from a different approach.

EthelFechan · 23/02/2019 12:52

I'm not sure I've ever read something quite so insensitive or offensive on mn ever

Look if you lot want to play depression and anxiety top trumps, I can match you. I'm offering an alternative point of view (what with this being a chat forum). I'd hate for others to be stuck in the prison that depression is and then wake up in their 50s and ask 'what happened to my life?'

rosinavera · 23/02/2019 12:58

Placemarking

Asta19 · 23/02/2019 12:58

Ethel. It’s one thing to offer a different perspective. I do so myself on here often. But you are doing it in a goady way. Saying things like “listen to you lot” etc. Can’t you see how you are coming across? Which then devalues anything useful you could have added to the conversation.

QuirkyQuark · 23/02/2019 13:30

Ethel I am most certainly not playing top trumps, I'm taking ADs, I'm about to start talking therapy that I SELF referred to and I'm trying to take one day at a time which is what I imagine most of the others on this thread are doing. Implying that we're wallowing in misery is unhelpful, unnescesary and rude.

As Asta has said, if you'd approached things differently in a supportive manner with kinder language you wouldn't be getting accused of goading us.