I posted recently about an internal promotion board in work which I went for and was gutted to not get. Anyway today I got the feedback and I didn't just miss out I seemed to have completely missed the mark. I didn't get a great score in any of the four competencies and got comments like "showed ineffective demonstration of skills and experience required", "poor example" and "didn't match example to criteria" It was much worse than I had expected. The thing is I really prepared, spent weeks going over the competencies and I thought that I had a lot to talk about from my job and lots of good examples. I felt that the interview went reasonably well. I answered all the questions and they were writing lots down but I seem to have missed the mark completely. I have applied for promotion several times externally and haven't got past the aptitude tests so this time there was an internal opportunity so I passed the aptitude tests, two rounds and fell at the final hurdle of the interview. I saw people that got through that are younger and less experienced which was pretty gutting. I always get good reviews at my appraisals and great suitability for next grade but cant flipping seem to get there, I just seem to get knocked down time and time again.
Besides from that my period has started, I have been crabby with my DH and kids for about the last week. I don't seem to be able to keep on top of the housework. I really do try my best but seem to be crap at my job, poor at housework and a miserable wife and mother.
On top of that I used to be friends with a group of girls but we lost touch. One of them has got in touch looking to rekindle things again but I find myself making excuses not to meet as I don't feel good about myself or where I am. They are all big talkers and if one of them had an issue it would all be talked about and discussed at length where I cant do that. I bottle things up and there is a lot of stuff that they just aren't aware off.
Sorry that turned in to a bit of a get off my chest rant!