Ex giving my number out as his.

[Hedwigsradio]

I split from my ex 2 years ago. He was emotionally abusive and hasn't taken the split well and still seems to think I still want to be with him/tries to hug me and sends creepy I know you still miss me stuff. We have children together so sadly I cant just block him. Anyway when we were together he used to give my number out for everything and now hes started doing it again and I dont know what to do about it. Last year I went through a very stressful time being assessed for tax credit fraud as he didn't change his address on important documents which I only found out when speeding fine letters came to mine.

I thought finally I had sorted everything and he was starting to accept the way things are and this starts again. I know its only stuff from shops, drs etc but its annoying the hell out of me just as much as the messing maintenance around all the time.

Has anyone else had experience of this and know what I can do. I dont really want to change my number as I've had it years and not sure if I can on a contract. I'm just so sick of his crap.

I know you don't want to change your number but - advise ex that contact is to be by email from now on and go ahead change your number.

I'm really sorry. He sounds vile.

Just ignore the incorrect phone calls, if you don't recognise the number, don't answer..let it go to voicemail then just ignore and don't even mention it to him.

He's only doing it to annoy you. If it's not a shop or doctors surgery you use just block it.

Thanks for the advice its mostly non stop texts. I know that's not a big deal but it gets on my nerves. I cant ignore all unknown calls as I'm starting a qualification with work and been getting lots of calls regarding it from numbers I dont know.

I guess I could change my number but dont know how that would work for contacting his mum who helps me alot with emergency childcare. She will just give him my new number. I know it's not so bad but it's like I finally feel free of his shit and it starts again.

Don't know if its any use but i had a colleague with a similar issue. She set her voicemail on and it said "hi, if u wish to speak to 'me,name ' please leave a message and i will call u back, if you wish to speak to 'ex /other' please redial '07blahblah' ,
The calls for 'other' soon stopped.

Thanks that's a good idea. I'm just so worried I will have to go through the checking process again this year. Plus I think the texts are kind of the straw that broke the camels back. Hes been telling one of the children that he can move back as soon as I say it's ok so I've had them getting angry with me for being so mean. I'm just sick of the shit really. Guess it serves me right for thinking the reason he hadn't had any relationships before me was because he was a "nice guy".

Sorry just having a bit of a vent as I cant talk about this stuff in rl. My family just think I was mad to stay with him for 10years.

Wow, considering your last update it sounds like your ex is determined to get back with you. I think you need to distance yourself from him as much as possible.

The voicemail message with a number to contact your ex is a good idea, but will it work for texts you receive for him?

Can you afford a cheap pre pay phone alongside your current one? Tell your ex you have a new number, give him it and block him on your other phone, also blocking anyone else who gets in touch for him. This way all things that come through on the new phone can be ignored if it is not from your ex.

You can also use the new phone for ex's mum so she can't tell him you still have the old phone and he still use it as a contact for other people. If he knew you still had the old phone he might get suspicious and wonder what's going on so it might be best to have a new phone for ex and his mum.

Not a good thing for you to have to deal with OP. Not wanting to intentionally worry you but if ex is still wanting you back what is he capable of doing if you start dating someone new and he finds out? You might need to put him in his place somehow and distance yourself as much as possible (as I said earlier) as he sounds as if he could cause you more problems in the future.

Thanks I know what you mean I dread to think what he would be like of I met someone new. When we were together he would get really nasty at me just talking to a cashier. Luckily for the moment he has put me off men for a long time. The second phone is a good idea may have to look into getting a little Nokia or something.

Tell him that from now on all your contact with him will be through email only. Set up a separate email address just for him. Then change your number.

If you need to ring his mother re: childcare etc, set your (new) number to private when you're ringing her. I have to do this on the (very rare) occasion that I have to ring MIL. She doesn't have my number because she's too much of a user and would constantly be ringing me looking for me to 'just do a quick favour'.
I've warned DH that if he ever gives it to her, I won't be happy.

Change your no. for your own calls and buy a cheap PAYG phone, give him and his mother that one, only take calls on it that you want to answer, ignore anything else.

That's a point she does have a habit of calling for no reason. Would be nice just to have a break from the pair of them.