How much do you do with dc on the weekends. Feel we're in a rut

[etta0]

We don't live near family and have very few friends. So we have no social events to go to on weekends, apart from the occasional dc birthday party.

I have become tired of being the energiser and organising things to do on the weekend. I'm also tired as I work full time. Dh isn't the best at organising things either. We also don't have the money spare to be doing much that is interesting. Ds4 is also in a difficult phase and can be unsafe in public, running off and also tantrumming and so its unpleasant to take him anywhere anyway.

So we tend to stay at home. They play and watch TV and we might pop out to the park sometimes.

I worry it's a little boring for the older dc, although they never complain.

How much do those of you with primary aged dc go out on the weekend? And those with no friends or family what do you do to keep interested in doing things just as a small family unit together?

defiance at 6 years old isn't normal. He should be doing what you tell him to do.

Hahahahaha. 🤣
What kind of kids do you hang out with?
The weirdness of people!

Dd has school sports Saturday morning, and at this time of year, may come down to the Den while I run Cubs as the Scouts have to do boatwork (maintenance of the boats they use in summer).

Sunday she generally spends doing training for sailing, I am doing a race series for the winter so I’m down there from midday too.

If dd doesn’t have much on, and homework/study has been done, she will often go on a bike ride with DH. I’m not fit enough for that.

Yesterday we also baked cookies that she is taking to a family event today. And she came up with and shopped for her own dinner (but asked me to cook it, under strict guidance, as she’s recovering from a basketball injury so her hand had got sore again).

I’d love to get back to having time to go hiking as a family again, do some shopping on occasion or just vegging in front of a movie. But maybe in a few years it will slow down again.....

We're also going through a rut.
We don't have family living nearby. She's just started high school and there have been divisions in the primary group. Of all the local mates she had, only 1 is left.
Her new mates don't live locally.
We used to go for walks, park, soft play, trampoline park.
She's got a foot problem (awaiting ortho app mid march) so cannot walk far or stand for long.
I'm a walker/cyclist but as she can't do it atm, it's miserable for her.
I've lost any mojo for going anywhere and if it wasn't for work and school we would hardly go out.
We have money, but it cannot give my DD full mobility ( can't afford private h.c).
So what do we do? Stay in, watch tv, play games, do makeovers (She's talented).
Shopping is fucking boring(even if we've got money).everywhere is so crowded, traffic jams, parking extortionate for my dd to suffer pain anyway. It's crap. I hope they can help her in March.
Just existing atm tbh.

@MWNA I hung out with my own children. That's how I know hahahahahahaha

My 4 year old does tennis on a Saturday morning and then we go swimming afterwards while my husband goes out with the toddler.Not sure what we'll do today. My husband is working so we may just go to the park or just stay home.

hiddenaspie1973 would your DD enjoy swimming? It might not aggravate her foot as much as something walking around. Or a craft cafe? Can while aaway a few hours painting and having a treat of some cake?

We go geocaching in almost all weathers.

If you haven't heard of it it's basically a treasure hunt played all over the world. People hide "caches" which are usually small containers with a log book in and some "swaps" - think keyrings, kinder egg toys etc. There's an app and you use GPS coordinates to try and find the cache.

They're hidden in towns and in the countryside. We've been on some great walks doing it and the kids love it as they like the plastic tat they get from the swaps.

I always try and get them outside for at least hour, even during the winter, as it makes us all feel much more energised.

Dd15 usually does her own thing with friends
Dd 8 has dancing but we tend to go to the library as she is doing a reading trail incentive.
Ds10 months just fits in with whatever we are doing.
Most weekends theres a party or something to go to.
We always go for a walk.
As a treat we will eat out once a month or so.
I tend to save days out in winter to indoor places for the holidays. Mine are off this week for half term. I cant wait for the summer months picnics and parks and icecream.

Could you get some board games for at home? Baking/cooking. Weathers abit nicer now for gardening.

FASTER - Thanks, we haven't been swimming for a while (local pool is not good). May take her further afield to a slightly better pool.
She loves craft and is good at that, the cafe sounds good 😀

hiddenaspie1973 you’re welcome. It’s hard sometimes to figure out what do to with them!

My dd's are 4 and 6, we always go out at the weekend, more often than not it's just a local park but do sometimes go to soft play.

I find they get bored and nag if we stay in and then they start bickering, dh & I end up spending too much time on the sofa getting narky and even though sometimes the last thing I feel like doing is going out I do always feel much better afterwards and so do the kids.

We've just signed up to the National Trust, it's £10 a month but you get free access to all their properties, there's loads within an hour of us so we'll easily fill one day a weekend with that plus we'll get free parking when we go on holiday to the Lakes and Cornwall.

Join the National Trust, it is worth it for family membership. You or your dh can take the kids on your own or all go together.

Go to the park, or the countryside or seaside for a walk or picnic or to explore if within reasonable distance.

Some churches have a open house type of thing on a Saturday morning. They serve tea and coffee sometimes food much cheaper than the cafe. Where the kids can play football, table tennis or board games or with little kiddy toys or do art and craft. Or they might have a theme each week like a science week or a book week. You can meet other parents there.

On Saturdays, they both have swimming lessons at 10 then we might go to a cafe after but the rest of the day we’ll generally chill - we do a bit of baking/ drawing/ board games but also just TV and playing amongst themselves.

On a Sunday, we’ll always go out somewhere. It can be something low key - local park, bowling, soft play, out for Sunday lunch etc etc. We have National Trust membership and I’d say we use it every 6wks or so. We also keep an eye on local papers/ Facebook groups for local events.

Depends really.

Yesterday DS1 was at rugby then they both had haircuts went to a bookshop then had a swimming lesson and then they went to see their grandfather (while I napped - result!). So quite busy.

As a pp said the rugby season is long!

Today it's raining so I'm thinking possibly cinema or a walk if it clears up.

DS2 has SN so it's tricky.

When they were smaller we went for a walk every Sunday to get us out of the house.

Oh I love chilled weekends.
I have quite a big age gap with my 2. Dd just turned 8 this week and ds will be 16 in a couple of weeks. Trying to accommodate them both can be tough.

Ds has a season ticket to our local premier league football team and goes to every home game and has started travelling to all away games too so almost every Saturday he is out. When they're not playing he goes out with his dad ( we are separated ) or with his friends.

Dp takes 8yr old dd out every Saturday. He works long hours during the week and loves this day with her. They usually go for a meal and do an activity such as trampolining, cinema, swimming etc and I get time to rest ( i have fibromyalgia ) and clean the house.

Sundays are a bit meh. My mum always hated them when I was little and I think it has rubbed off on me!
Sundays are when uniforms get ironed, bags are sorted, shoes are polished etc.
Dp will often offer to take both dc out but it's normally only dd as ds will be revising or playing on Fortnite.
Unlike Saturday where money is spent, Sunday is more of a free day and they will go to a park which dd loves or bike riding.

I love having no plans and just going with the flow. I'm at my most relaxed and will often stay in my pyjamas with no make up or hair done.
Kids are not at home enough sometimes and love just chilling too. Life is so fast paced these days. Don't feel guilty about doing nothing.

It's a mixture - we see family quite a lot, some weekends are taken up with shopping and practical stuff and a couple of times a month we'll eat out at lunch or in the evening. Now and then we have a day out - in summer sometimes for a walk or to somewhere on the coast. It's all very uneven and sometimes the kids whinge we haven't done anything fun for a bit but we tell them not every weekend can be fun.

Rugby 10-12 on a Saturday morning, once a month there's an away match which will take up most of Saturday (usually 1-1.5 hours away in the club coach). On training day we'll have lunch out and go to the beach, or belt up and down on his scooter. Yesterday we had lunch at home then 5-9 he went to play at a friend"s house.

Sunday we often take a picnic into the mountains and hike somewhere, find a stream to dip our feet and let the dog swim . It"s a little cool at the moment so today we're going around the flea market by the cathedral to nosey around, buy a €1 book for D's, meet a friend for vermouth while D's plays with her son in a big square. Sometimes DH will take DS out to see in-laws.

But if DS is pooped, especially after an away match, Sunday will be at home chilling out: Lego, reading, drawing, crafts, bucket of soldiers invading the living room, den under the dining table etc.

Downtime and chilling out are invaluable.

our best weekends: Take it in turns to have a lie in. One of you do something with them on Saturday am (play games, go swimming) and one on Sunday am.

One movie/dvd night. A Sunday roast and a bit of Sunday homework. Chill the rest of the time. Pizza on Friday night.

Maybe a walk somewhere onSaturday afternoon eg NT or a bus ride

Not all of those every weekend...

I used to hate hanging out in freezing parks etc when DH had to work weekends

We are the same, DS aged 7 has to write a weekend diary and he often says he runs out of things to put 🙈 the fact is I am pregnant at the moment and have been feeling absolutely awful the whole way through so although there are all these lovely days out I would love to do I just don't feel upto it! 2 weeks to go and I can't wait to be back to normal!

Both boys play football and have matches on Saturday and Sunday mornings, I tend to have a lazy morning and a bit of a tidy up/organise on these mornings or if the weather has been nice we will all go and watch the game as there are other siblings that my DC play with. Sunday afternoons we go to the in laws for dinner. Yesterday after football DH cleaned the car and the kids had some screen time, we then took scooters and walked to the park for an hour or so and then got pizzas and a sweet on the way back and came home and had a movie night which was nice! We quite often have been doing this.

Sometimes we will go swimming, crazy golf, cinema or bowling perhaps every 2 weeks and we also have National trust membership so a nice walk out the house is always good.

Before being pregnant perhaps once a month or two we would do a bigger day out such as go upto London to the museums, travel down to the coast etc and once baby is born hoping to do more of this.

DH & DS1 have football every Saturday & Sunday morning, so weekends are limited, particularly in the winter. We only have 1 car, which they take, so the other Dses (7 & 4) & I generally go to the library or playpark in the village or stay at home. We also have a very limited budget.

Sometimes in the afternoons we'll make it out for a walk in the woods or a country park. Or we might visit my parents.

Summer is slightly better as we have better weather & more daylight hours, so we can go for walks further afield.

If I had the car, I would take the little ones swimming (free due to them having lessons there) or to soft play or to the local estuary town etc.

Summer holidays are great as there is no football & we have days out throughout the country, castles etc.

I really wish there was not football on both weekend days

It's nice to chill. Lots of pressure nowadays to 'do stuff' #makingmemories. However it does sound like you could do a bit more? Cycle ride, geocaching, basic gardening like sunflower seeds, baking are easy and cheap. Maybe get them out in the morning to park as well then do house stuff afternoons. Film with popcorn, board games, hama beads, stone painting. You don't need to always meet people but there might be sports activity they could do?

We have 12 & 15 yos who like nothing more than staying at home. I hate it as I WFH so come the weekend am desperate to get out!

DS (15) needs prising away from the Xbox so football in the form of playing, coaching and refereeing means he's busy with that a few hours each weekend. He meets up sometimes with his friends but we have no involvement - he gets the train to see them.

DD (12) has band practice at the weekend and sometimes a netball match but we do tend to peel her away for something else like shopping, a local walk, local wildlife centre, cinema. Sometimes she will meet up with friends.

We do little as a whole family outside the house. DS can usually be persuaded to eat out but we don't do this regularly. Sometimes we will have friends over for supper or lunch but unless they have DC then our DC don't get involved that much.

We've never done the National Trust thing - DS would rather pull out his own toenails than "walk aimlessly" round somewhere - and the idea of him coping in a museum "standing and staring at things" is unthinkable. DD OTOH quite likes both so tend to do those things with her & her friends and leave DS at home.

It bothers me sometimes that we don't do more as a family.

Oh, and Saturday night is boardgame night. Although we'll do it this afternoon around 5ish as we were out late last night.

We'll play two or three, or do a jigsaw. It's nice to get some family focussed time with lots of giggles and crisps!

It's been interesting reading about your weekends. I think we might need to look at getting the dcs to choose an activity to do on the weekend. They've never done any before so this might be what we are missing.

I think I find it difficult because my childhood was quite different, we lived in the country and did lots of outdoor activities and had a garden. Dh grew up in a flat in a city just like we live now so he doesn't think it is unusual to just spend a lot of time inside doing nothing much. He spends most of the weekend playing guitar and talking to us all. I don't really have many indoor hobbies so tend to just clean and potter around, talk to Dh and then feel like I should be doing more with the dc. I never bake or do anything like that with them as I don't do those sort of things, I just prepare regular simple food. The Dc do seem happy doing nothing much, they play with their toys and watch TV. Maybe I need to find an indoor hobby