Anyone else's mother hooked on 'mother's little helpers' in the 70's and 80's?

[DownButNotDefeated]

I believe it was quite common then for GP's to hand out Valium.

I am wondering if it partly explains my mother's parenting - no empathy or affection, violence and aggression, together with her convenient memory loss about that now! I've read all of that can be side effects of long term use.

She was on them for a good 10 years from when I was around 7/8.

Anyone else have experience of this?

Mine was, and for about 10 years in the same window - I don’t relate to your description of your mum though, I wonder if it’s more the underlying condition being treated?

Yes, mine had severe PND. She hated taking valium though (or 'nerve tablets' as she called them) and weaned herself off them. I remember her breaking them in half to reduce the dose. I guess she would have been on them for around 6 years. I don't recall any of the behaviour you describe though.

My DGM was in Valium for decades but she wasn’t as you described your mother. My DGM was just constantly in bed, zonked out. We would stay with her for weekends and weeks during the summer and be left to our own devices until she surfaced late afternoon. She was kind, loving and never aggressive or violent. She was just spaced out.

That's interesting Stop. I've read aggression and psychotic disturbances can be a side effect of long term use which is why I was interested to see if others had experiences of this. My mother is still a pretty toxic person over 30 years later though!

My mum had the "purple heart" pills , think they were for depression. She said they lifted her spirits. Oddly, she used to try and give them to me and my sister, who were in our teens, if we had an important exam or something! She'd say "It gives you just that little bit more confidence! " Sis and I laugh about it now, but it was a bit odd!

Cross posted with other replies. Thank you all.

Hmmm. My mother blamed my absent father for her being on Valium, which I took responsibility for of course . Very interesting.

My memories of my mum during my childhood mirror yours OP. However, that was during the 90s/2000s so much later on and with methadone as opposed to Valium. She once told me she’d kill herself if she didn’t have her methadone as it was the only thing that kept her happy (not her three children and grandchild).

I agree with above poster that the behaviour was a symptom of the underlying reason for the medication though, not the medication itself.

It’s tricky isn’t it because psychotic disturbances and aggression can also be symptoms of ongoing mh issues! I seem to recall that Prozac etc also list side effects that can sound like the condition being treated for.

I too remember my mum needing a nap in the afternoons, but being a kind under reactive sort mostly. Photos of her she looks totally ‘not there’ that zonked out look in her eye. She’s still the same, she shuts down or escapes into distractions when she can’t deal with things.

Sounds like you have unreconciled thoughts avoir your childhood bothering you and you would benefit from talking to a professional - whether it was the pills or the illness, I’m sure it’s not what your mum expected or wanted to be like as a parent.

Yes

She had to be medicated so she could stay with my verbally abusive father

40 years later she is still with him. And still medicated.

My dm was on them in the 80's, she's now on AD's, sleeping pills and self medicates with wine.

I was prescribed Valium once - when I had an injury and was in pain. I took it and it knocked me out. This was before I had children - but if it had been when they were little then I don't think I would have been able to look after them.

I don't think it changed my personality when I was taking it - it literally knocked me out so that I was able to sleep. I was also taking muscle relaxants. I only took it for a few days until worst of the pain had passed and I was able to move about a bit.

Yes but she did manage to get off them and onto much better, safer, less addictive ADs when SSRIs became an option.
Tbh the valium probably saved her life at the time, so although things weren't great they did at least finally get much better when I was a teenager.

I was prescribed Valium for two weeks recently and a week before Christmas too due to having had some sort of major breakdown - 2mg 3/4 x a day as needed . I was out of it - slept 16-18 hours a day and hardly ate a thing other than McDonald’s delivery and chocolate . Not very anxious but also not very functional either - my lecturer had to help me walk as I was so woozy at one point . Stopping even at such a low dose after two weeks has been hell - flu like symptoms and rigoring. Not fun .

Very, very addictive - if you told me where to buy them safely I’d buy them because the horrible feelings that anxiety causes goes in ten minutes , and I can’t get that relief anywhere else . It’s like stepping into a cosy bath at the end of a hard day at work . It’s just getting a coherent sentence out and getting off them that’s hell .

But I would agree that it probably stopped me from going down the road I wanted to - I was preparing to OD , which GP knew about - and the diazepam stopped that .

I’ve always wondered how freely it was prescribed, given it garnered its own nickname regarding the demographic it was used amongst most.

I wonder if a lot of women prescribed it then, didn’t tell anyone.

firstly yes my mum was addicted to them and when she came off had a really bad breakdown
secondly i was prescribed valium as i had childhood issues no one knew but i was sexually abused hence why my behaviour became so bad how old was i when i was put on valium? 6 year of age perfectly true

labazsosgoingmad I was nearly prescribed Valium at 5 for anxiety but luckily the GP my mum took me too was an older gent coming close to retirement and didn’t like the way Valium was being pushed so to her that even though it was the treatment he was supposed to give refused to for someone so young.
I still suffer from anxiety, but I am grateful the GP decided what he did

My mum was on vallium and Ativan (they mat be the same thing; I don't know). She was just very unemotional, not violent or aggressive. I don't remember ever getting hugs or kisses.

Valium is diazepam and Ativan is lorazepam, they are both benzodiazepines but lorazepam is fast acting and diazepam slower acting

I agree on its addictiveness - ive taken one for severe hiccups and just felt so relaxed, I also think I’d be tempted if they were easier to get

they were handed out like smarties my mum was like a zombie on them and so was i they worked as i didnt cry or have outbursts why the hell noone asked why a perfectly calm happy child had such a major personality change is beyond me abuse affects a child deeply esp when it happens to her by 4 unrelated people when mum came off them one day she just lost it smashed a casserole crying screaming i was only 13 scared the bejesus out of me i just remember ringing my sister and dad who were both at work begging them to come home to help me back on valium think that one was called librium or something similar