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Original poster

Malicious WhatsApp group with photos of my daughter

17 replies

Moodymmai1 · 16/02/2019 06:47

My daughter has a group of friends at school who she was getting on well with. She's in Year 7.She is a very nice girl who knows her own mind and won't follow the crowd. One of the girls in the group set up a WhatsApp group where she's the only admin. My daughter said she wanted to be an admin also and the girl made a big song and a dance about it, made her an admin, then deleted her from the group. My daughter also has another good friend, who this girl doesn't like and makes nasty comments about,and my dd has made a great effort to spend time with her other friend at school, which this girl is not happy about.
Now this girl has made a WhatsApp group about my daughter with pictures of her and the group is called something like "photos of..." some of my dds friends from out of school became aware about it. She has also started being really nasty about my dd, calling her names behind her back.
I am unsure how to handle this. My dd doesn't want me to speak to her head of year. What do people think?

OP posts:
AdoreTheBeach · 16/02/2019 07:13

I’d love to come out with something witty but the truth of the matter is this is bullying, most schools have strict rules about online bullying too.

Please do go to the head, about this group what’s app and the group that was used to bully the friend. If at all possible, see if you can obtain screen shots.

I’m sorry you’re daughter is gong through this. I do hope something is done about this bully mean girl

FogCutter · 16/02/2019 07:21

It's bullying so report it to the school.

Similar social media bullying has happened at DSs school (amongst y7 girls), the school have taken it very seriously and stopped it.

madeyemoodysmum · 16/02/2019 07:33

Go to the school This needs to be dealt with

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adelias · 16/02/2019 07:41

Please report to school, they have the power to confiscate phones, search them and delete anything inappropriate. This is bullying and the school will definitely be interested.

yodelsay · 16/02/2019 08:06

It's very easy to download a whole chat history on WhatsApp if you are a member of the group
Click the middle off the top bar in the chat and scroll down to the option near the bottom that says 'export chat'. Choose to send to yourself as an email. Bingo evidence!

Original poster
Moodymmai1 · 16/02/2019 08:09

She's not a member of this group. She only knows about it because someone saw it on her phone

OP posts:
yodelsay · 16/02/2019 08:12

I assume she probs knows some of the other girls in the group? I'd approach the mother of one of them to download chat. A lot of kids get added to groups they don't want to be part of but don't want to leave to look uncool.

WhoGivesADamnForAFlakeyBandit · 16/02/2019 08:19

This is one for the Head of Year 7 who will be very, very used to dealing with similar stuff and have policies to deal with it. Don't try to sort it yourself.

Iamstrongiammum · 18/02/2019 19:38

Just found out my daughter has been excluded from her best friends birthday celebration.
Our girls are the same age (8) and have been friends since birth (NCT)
They go to different schools but see each other every other weekend due to family commitments and work etc. Usually hang out the whole day or go on a day trip etc.
I consider the mum a very close friend, to the extent that I was considering asking her if she would raise my daughter if anything ever happened to me. (I have no family and dd’s dad isn’t interested) so this family is very important to us, they mean a lot.
After being asked to keep some dates free whilst mum worked out when the celebration could happen, time ticked by and I started to wonder where the invite was. Fast forward to a week before and I have to ask out right if she had finalised the date yet, to be told that something was happening for school friends only and she would get back to us about when we could do something, but she wasn’t sure when it would be.
I almost burst into tears when I heard this. My little girl would be destroyed if she found out. I feel physically sick and I don’t know what to do. It’s so mean.
I want to add that my daughter also knows some of these children that have been included from other parties and get togethers, she’s very well behaved and gets on with everyone and is no trouble. I cannot think of why they wouldn’t invite her.
I’m a considerate friend, I don’t impose myself or take the piss, I never ask for anything and always offer to help out when I can.
I feel so upset. Have I just completely mis-read and entire friendship for the past 9 years?
What should I do?

mamasiz · 18/02/2019 19:41

Maybe start a thread of your own?

Dreamzcancometrue · 18/02/2019 21:11

Go to the head of year, he/she will then take the necessary measures to ensure it stops. Bullying is serious, more and more kids are harming/killing themselves over things they see on social media, I would def get this nipped in the bud before it escalates. Good luck!

AdoreTheBeach · 19/02/2019 06:25

@iamstrongiammum please do create a thread for your situation as it’s very sad situation, you’re upset and could do with the advice.

Original poster
Moodymmai1 · 02/03/2019 21:54

Thanks for your comments everyone. I sent an email to the Head of Year and the girls were spoken to. They have apologised to my daughter and have taken the group chat down. My dd doesn't want to be close to them any more , understandably, but it seems to have calmed down now! Thanks for your support .

OP posts:
IndigoDream · 02/03/2019 22:01

iamstrong has already posted about this, I think her thread didn't go the way she wanted.

moody hopefully you can treasure your daughter that these situations aren't a reflection on her, rather they say more about the people engaging in this type of behaviour.

IndigoDream · 02/03/2019 22:01

Treasure = reassure

Thatsalovelycuppatea · 16/03/2019 18:33

I would report this to the head teacher. There is a age limit of 16 for WhatsApp and they should not be on there.

Spiderbanana · 16/03/2019 18:36

Well done OP.

It is by addressing bullying firmly and early that we can best stop it altogether

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